What happens when you force Slayers to sing?
by Akita
Summary: Story much like my other one Singin' Slayers but planned to be a longer one. I'm SO evil. Again, Slayers crew is forced to sing songs, which reveal things they'd like to remain hid. Major OOCness, LG AZ and FX hints. To sum up BEWARE.
1. How they've put themselves in this

Okay, I know that I'm stupid and that I should finish my other stories before I put up another one, but... umm... well... I just had to take this idea from my mind. Sorry!

So. This is a story very much like 'Singin' Slayers', but I plan to put more work in this one and to make it few chapters long. Horrible, isn't it?

But I have worse news – I decided that I'll try to write it by myself and not to bother Airi with all my 'work' (I have really BIG problems with my school lately, so if she is at least half as much tired annoyed as me... well, I hope that she isn't. So bad news – here comes back Akita with a looooooot of mistakes, misspellings etc. Please, be lenient...

* * *

This time, at the beginning of the story we find Slayers band... surprisingly NOT in an inn, but in the middle of the road to nowhere. 

Just joking.

Lina co are in a restaurant, having their usual fight-for-food. Well, at least Lina, Gourry and Amelia, because Zel was as usual sipping his coffee and trying to look as if he didn't know these freaks next to him, Filia was sipping her tea and Xellos was probably in the neighbourhood wreaking chaos, pain and sorrow. Don't ask, you don't want to know the details.

So as I said, Lina almost whole co were fighting to fill their stomachs.

"Miss Lina, it's unjust! You've eaten whole chicken!"

"Shut up Amelia! I'm hungry and nothing's gonna stand between me and... GOURRY! WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH MY SPAGHETTI!" yelled Lina throwing a few fireballs at him, but blonde knowingly dodged them and moved away for a while.

Well, maybe he's not the smartest person in the neighbourhood, but during his travels with Lina he learned one thing – It's better to move from her way, hoping that she'll accidentally miss something , than get burned and still be hungry.

Suddenly, all lights in the room went dim; windows and door closed with a loud 'smack'. All people, including Slayers band, jumped from their places looking around. Then, all candles in the room blew out, one after another. Zelgadis drew out his sword, and so did Lina.

"Guys, is everything okay?" asked redhead staring in the darkness trying to see anything.

"Yeah, but what's going on?"

"Mr. Zelgadis! I'm scared!" said Amelia glomping to the figure next to her.

"Umm... Amelia... As far as I remember Zel was on your right.."

"Oh, sorry Miss. Lina!" apologised Ame and a few moments later chimera felt tiny hands around his waist.

' God thanks that it's so dark..." he thought feeling warmth coming to his cheeks.

In that moment all candles lit up.

'Damn...'

Lina glanced at the room, but she didn't notice anything strange or unusual. Well, madly blushing Zelgadis who is being clutched by Amelia... you just get used to it. She looked left to see if Gourry's all right... but he wasn't there!

Lina quickly turned around to find him, but blonde was nowhere to be seen. Just as she started anicing, she looked at the table...

"What are YOU doing with MY roasted beef! FIREBALL!"

Slayers gang took their seats pretending that nothing has happened...

But evil was watching them... Their every move... Evil was close... VERY close...

Zel turned right saying "Filia, would you please give me that kettle of coffee..."

He stopped in the middle of the sentence realising, that on the chair, which was supposed to be free (because Xellos was off) was now seating GAGGED and TIED Xel, and that someone was leaning against his chair.

That 'someone' was dressed in long, black cape, had green-greyish eyes and hair of an unidentified colour (mix of blonde brown) and happened to be a girl.

(Guess whom... MOI of course. Who else would have such sick ideas... Okay, maybe not me, but let's say that my alter ego. Who cares, read on!)

In that moment whole table noticed an extra guest.

"Who are you?" asked Lina

"And how did you do this to him! I tried so many times and I never could, even hitting him with my mace gave me..." Filia stopped her babbling when Lina sent her a look.

"... nevermind .."

Girl threw mazoku off his chair (Golden dragon ACCIDENTALY stepped on him) and took a seat.

"My name is not important. Important is what I can give YOU."

Lina co blinked, so she continued.

"I have an offer for you – I will make your deepest dreams come true, but you have to do me a favour..."

"What kind of favour" asked redhead. Gourry took advantage on the situation putting everything he could into his mouth, chimera last his contact with reality because of certain princess clutched to his arm.

'Thatgirl is_strange..._Anyway, it'sa good pretext to be near to Zel-chan...'

And Filia was way to preoccupied with indenting her heel into one's mazoku head.

"Well, let's say that you'll be forced to play a game with sick rules, which really don't exist, forced to do things against your will and everything will be given to public eyes, so you'll probably loose your honour and dignity." Lina twitched and tried to interrupt, but girl continued "If you survive, I'll give make your deepest wishes come true." Redhead narrowed her eyes. " Let's say like mountains of money.. and as much food as you can put in your stomach.." after these words sorceress eyes went starry.

"Okay, WE agree!" jumped Lina

Girl grinned. "My name is Haiiro" she said giving her a hand. Lina shook her hand and in that moment she and all her companions dissapeard.

:Grey in Japanese. Lately obsessed with this colour D. :

* * *

When Lina opened her eyes she saw that she's not in the inn anymore. It was rather big building with glass roof showing starred, night sky. Walls were covered with lamps that beamed with red light. She also noticed that one wall of that strange room was actually a curtain, from behind of which came quite music and sounds of people talking. 

"Hey, Lina, are you okay?" redhead heard Gourry's question, but she couldn't see him.

"Yeah... Actually yes."

"Great. Now would you please get off us?" Lina looked down and she noticed that all her friends were lying beneath her.

"Oops, sorry!"

The whole group stood up looking around the room. Except of Xellos, because he was still tied down, but no one seemed to care...

"Woke up already?" They turned around as one man to see that freakin' girl leaning against the wall. "That's good. I suppose you would like to know what to do."

"Lina, what's going on in here?" chimera turned around to sorceress.

"Well.. uhh.. you know. I agreed to participate in one game..." she said sweatdropping "because as a reward that girl promised to fulfil our wishes, so you see..." she looked at twitching Zel " you can ask her to turn you back..."

Chimera mood instantly changed. "Is that true?" he asked Haiiro.

"I will make your deepest wishes come true. I said that before, but NO ONE wanted to listen me. Hmpf" she seemed to be quite annoyed with fact that they ignored her before.

Zel thought for a while. Well, becoming a normal human WAS his deepest wish, so what he had to loose? But one thing hounted his mind...

"So what are the rules of this game?" asked Filia

"I wanted to ask the same question" joined her Zelgadis.

"Well, none" girl ginned " I will make them during the game"

Group sweatdrop.

Slayers gang gathered in a circle to discuss topic of participating in that sick play"

"Something stinks in here. I think we shouldn't risk." Said Zel

"But if she's true I think that it's worth it." Filia looked at faces of her friends.

"Who is that girl?"

"But if there are no rules she can do everything with us!"

"For the sake of Justice we shouldn't resign from such marvellous chance to bring eternal peace to the world!"

"I'm hungry."

"Hurry up guys! I won't wait forever!" yelled Haiiro.

"Okay, quick decision. I will take part in it." Lina raised her hand to the middle of the circle.

"If Lina's in, I'm too." Gourry placed his hand on redheads.

( :blush:blush:)

"What do we have to loose? "said Filia joining them.

"Count me in!" said Amelia putting her hand on Filia's.

Zelgadis just sighed, but knowing that he's in minority, he also joined them.

Meanwhile, girl approached to mazoku and took the gag from his mouth.

"NO WAY! I'm NOT in your games! I'M the one to manipulate others!" he yelled immediately as he could talk.

"As if you had any choice..." sighed Haiiro untying him. " I asked Beastmaster to rent you, so you have no choice." Girl smirked.

"Why, Beastmaster. WHY? FOR WHAT?" yelled mazoku making dramatical pose.

: Meanwhile, on the Wolfpack Island:

"For 1000 gold pieces, NO WAY I said. For 2000, NO! But for 20 bottles of fine Zephillia wine I would give away my own life..." said Zellas sipping more dark liquid from her glass.

:Back to Slayers:

Xel sweatdrooped.

Lina co faced Haiiro "Okay, we agree to take part in your game."

"Great" she answered "So let the fun begin!"

In that moment all lights went bright blinding everyone in the room, from the floor suddenly emerged 7 armchairs, six on one side of page, side to curtains, and one standing separately, with a table covered with bunch of paper next to it. Slayers cast took their seats, Lina in pink armchair, Gourry in the blue one, Amelia white, Zel beige, Filia yellow and Xellos in purple one. Their crazy host sat down on a luxurious green armchair that stood face to them.

Before Lina managed to ask "And what?" a curtain raised and they were greeted with loud applause. Slayers gang saw that they were in place that seemed to be a restaurant with a scene, where they were.

Few seconds later applause faded away and now only one person was clasping, but...

:smack:kick:boom:

..he was quickly quietened by the security.

"Okay, Haiio, Haini, or what your name was. What re we supposed to do now?" asked chimera sarcastically.

"What do you mean what? SING, OF COURSE!"

Slayers's mouths gaped wide open.

"NOT AGAIN!"

* * *

Well, this the first chapter. Sorry 'bout my English, but... hey! Now I have my winter vacation (or whatever you call it) so my "English-thinking" is a little bit... out of order. Sorry! 

Please, tell me about my mistakes, so I can correct them :)

Anyway, RR Of course!

Flames welcome! It's damn cold in here...


	2. Show yourself with song L&G

Thanx for all reviews! And as we come to that...

Um... klfh, I'm not Finnish :D

I would also like to thank:

Lady Dark Angel

Kindall

Airi

Mistress DragonFlame (I'm so sorry! I didn't want to make I mistake so much that I... did it...:sweatdrop: )

Lina Gabriev ( for your suggests! )

ARIGATOU!

So let the chapter begin!

Disclaimer: I don't own anything in that story, except of my sick ideas. Kill me.

* * *

"WHAT!" You didn't say anything about singing before!" yelled Lina putting Haii's head in headlock.

"I didn't say anything about **not** singing either! You agreed to do EVERYTHING!" cough up girl.

"Did we? Oh, so I quit! Come on guys!"

"But Miss Lina! Don't you remember?" Amelia jumped on her armchair...

...fell down on her face, stood up and made her 'Justice pose'

"We are obliged to do everything we can when there is a slightest chance of bringing peace to the whole world we cannot give up! We have to fight with love in our hearts, even if our life is in danger, even if we have to leave our family and friends, EVEN IF WE HAVE TO SING!"

:blink:blink:

"Who cares! Let's go Gourry."

"Uh? What? Who? Where? Why?" Redhead cached her companion by ear and dragged him away.

"Miss Lina! You don't give me a choice!" princess quickly picked something from her secret hideout and raised it up high. It was pink, fluffy notebook.

Zel and Filia sat in one of the tables, both sipping their coffee/tea. Looking at their friend's quarrels was a lot better, than being in the middle of it.

Xel sat in the dark corner of the room, repeating rapidly: "Why... Zellas, why me? ... "

Lina glanced over her shoulder at Amelia. Her eyes went wide as she saw what her friend has in her hands.

"You wouldn't dare..." she narrowed her eyes.

"You leave me no choice..." Ame said in the cold voice.

Someone in the audience burst into tears yelling: "This is so dramatic!"

:smack:hit:

Security seems to be rather fierce today...

Amelia opened the lock in the notebook and stared to read:

"My dear diary, I, the most beautiful sorcess in the world, felt so bad today! And because of who? That stupid and selfish chimera just **had** to ruin **everything** looking for **his** cure. Sometimes I really think that he's made of really thick..."

"STOP!" Lina left confused swordsman on the ground and jumped on Amelia. "Where do you have it from? How could you!"

Then, redhead was thrown into the wall because something veery heavy hit her. Well, it happened to be rather nervy chimera. "I'm made of really thick **what**?"

Lina nervously laughed lying upside-down next to the big hole in the wall.

"Okay, you've had your talk, but it's time to start the show. Would you please sit down?" said Haiiro dragging Xel to his seat.

Everyone sat down on their places, Lina and Amelia back to themselves.

"So, LET THE SHOW BEGIN!"

... ... silence ... ...

"stupid stubborn people..." Haii mumbled "Nevermind. It time to..."

YAAYYY! WOOHOOO:applouse:applouse:

":blink:blink: seems that audience has problems with their reflex.. as usual.. Well, it's time to explain to our guests WHAT they're supposed to do:

This game consists of few rounds... I don't know how many exactly, but nevermind.

One who wins gonna get an extra 'Surprise-Reward', SR in short. First round is ..."

Everyone held his or her breath.

"Song that best describes your personality! Our special guest will be given..."

YAAYYY! WOOHOOO:applouse:applouse:

" ... ... umm... where was I... They will be given a few songs to choose from and they'll have to pick and sing one, that they think suits them the best. They'll have to sing WHOLE song ignoring random ins... umm... comments. Soo... Lina Inverse, you're first!"

Lina stood up and angrily went to Haii. In the middle way she looked over her shoulder and stuck her tongue at Amelia, accidentally pointing at one of cards that show host gave to her.

"Okay, so you've made your choice! Now I'd like you to go behind the stage and dress up." Haiiro patted her on the shoulder. Lina panicky looked at her lyrics and...

"NO WAY! I'm NOT going to sing THAT one! I refuse! Give me another one! It's not about me!"

"I'm sorry, but you chose this one. And well, all songs were supposed to fit you. I PERSONALLY picked them for you all"

The rest of Slayers gang gulped thinking about their turns...

Security dragged kicking and shouting Lina behind the stage.

"So, now when we have a while, shall we talk with our wonderful audience!"

YAAYYY! WOOHOOO:applouse:applouse:

"...They're doing it to throw me off balance... Okay, so..." Haii took a microphone from nowhere and approached to the first table. "Good afternoon, can you introduce yourselves?"

"Of course. My name is Taka, and this lovely girl next to me is Miaka. We met each other in a book 'Universe of Four Gods' when I was Tamahome, but..."

Haii quickly jumped off "Well, yes, that's wonderful, but it seems that Lina is ready!"

All lights were directed to the scene entrance and few seconds later there were heard footsteps.

All the men in the inn starred whistling (half of them was soon quietened by their companions), Gourry's jaw dropped and his eyes went starry, Zel only glanced at her and came back to his previous activity (staring at Amelia without her noticing it) and Xel was broke out from his trance and he opened ONE EYE! Seeing that whole famine part of drooled of, but that's not important...

"So, ladies , gentleman all you freaks around, let me introduce ya to...

LINA INVERSE as BRITNEY SPEARS in 'MY PREROGATIVE!"

Lina walked in her high-heel leather boots to the middle of the scene and put her long, dispelled hair behind ear. She was wearing black leather jacket and black bra under it and black, tight, leather shorts. In short, she was rather more naked than clothed... Whole Britney (I hate her... nevermind)

Suddenly before redhead magically appeared microphone. She took a breath thinking 'Do it for food', and she was just to start singing when...

"STOP! Before you start, who do you want to dedicate it to?"

"**What?"**

"There is such a tradition, everyone has to dedicate their songs to someone very special to them... and it can't be random person from the audience!"

Lina sweatdrooped 'Damn.. That was just what I wanted to do..." she looked at faces of her friends 'Xellos no, he won't let me live if I do it, Filia... no! Someone could think that I'm a lesbian... So Amelia not too... Zel... no. Gourry? Well, he's to stupid to think about any overtones...'

"I'd like to dedicate this stupid song to stup...Gourry!"

Audience 'awed'. Lina tried to ignore it and started singing:

„Of course the ones to disturb Lina are you, Slayers!" quickly added Haii

:spoken:  
_People can take everything away from you  
But they can never take away your truth  
But the question is..  
Can you handle mine? _

"I don't think so... after hearing that fragment of your diary I don't..."

:twitch:  
_They say I'm crazy  
I really don't care_

"As long as they don't mention size of your breasts..." innocently added mazoku. Filia helped Lina out in hitting him.

_That's my prerogative  
They say I'm nasty _

_But I don't give a damn_

Xellos was to say something, but Filia send him her special say-something-and-die look, so he was quiet.

_Getting boys is how I live _

:cough: Until The Prince happens to be Justice freak :cough:  
_Some ask me questions  
Why am I so real?  
But they don't understand me  
I really don't know the deal about my sister_

"Just mention her name and Lina would run away" mumbled Zel

:Lina shivered:  
_Trying hard to make it right  
Not long ago  
Before I won this fight _

_Everybody's talking all this stuff about me  
Why don't they just let me live? _

"Why don't SHE just let them leave? I wonder how many people got hurt when Lina got angry or something..." wondered Ame

"You don't want to know." Sarcastically answered Zel

_I don't need permission, make my own decisions  
That's my prerogative  
that's my prerogative _

_It's the way that I wanna live_

_You can't tell me what to do_

"I tried once... It REALLY hurt..." sighed Filia

:Lina simply fireballed her:

"Ouch... just like now..:

_Don't get me wrong  
I'm really not souped  
Ego trips is not my thing _

"Don't worry Lina, we wouldn't even think about you doing that..." Zel was still mad about Lina's diary...

:Lina tried to burn Zel, but missed:

_All these strange relationships really gets me down  
I see nothing wrong in spreading myself around  
_

"Never thought that someone maybe don't..." Redhead sent Amelia such look, that she stopped.

_Everybody's talking all this stuff about me  
Why don't they just let me live?  
I don't need permission, make my own decisions  
That's my prerogative  
That's my prerogative X2  
_  
_It's the way that I wanna live_

_You can't tell me what to do_

_why can't I live my life  
without all of the things  
That people say_

:spoken:

Like my dear friends who's gonna be sorry in a while..  
_oh oh ohhh..._

Male part of audience stood up clasping in applause. Lina ginned, stuck her tongue out at Zel and went behind the stage to dress in her normal clothes.

"Well, thank you Lina, it was quite nice try."

Lina came back and sat on her armchair.

"Yes, you made it well. Anyone from audience wants to say anything?"

One man raised his hand, so Haii levitated to him.

"Yes?" she gave him the microphone.

"Where's that sexy girl that sang before and who's that flat girl?"

"FIREBALL!"

Man was burnt into crisp. Haiiro sweatdroopped and came back to the stage.

"Let's pretend that nothing's happened. Security! Take that... umm.. remains out. Okay... Gourry, you're next!"

Blonde stood up and came to her.

"What? Free food?"

":sweatdrop: maybe later, Gourry. Now, please pick the song that fit's you the best."

"... ... what? You mean like my clothes? I don't know... these cards seem to small for me..."

":double sweatdrop: Nevermind. Pick the song you like the best."

Gourry looked at the cards seeming to think hardly. (Impossible, I know) Meanwhile, host wondered if he actually could read, but if he could read all those menus's, so who knows... Maybe he just orders the same as Lina...

"I've got it!"

Haii looked over his arm. Well, actually it would be hard to do it, so she looked just from below his arm.

":triple sweatdrop: Umm... are you sure?"

"That's not fair! You didn't ask ME whether I'm sure! FIRE..."

"OKAY, okay! Now, Gourry, please go behind the stage and... umm... dress up. Okay, now when we have a while shall we talk with another pair here?"

She quickly flew to the another table, avoiding Taka and Miaka and went to another table. "So, what's your name?"

"Hi! My name is Misty" said girl with quite short red hair "and this one next to me "she poked guy with short, black hair "is Ash"

"Uhm. So what can you tell me about yourselves?"

Girl was about to say something, but in this moment waiter brought them their chicken. When boy saw it he jumped on the table shouting:

"OH NO! PIGEOT! YOU ARE BURNT! OH NO! BREATHE, BREATHE!" and then he started to reanimate their dish. Misty sighed "And again all for nothing... He's too obsessed with Pokemon to go on a normal date..."

"Oh" Haii blinked "Well, Gourry has dressed till now, so let's watch him"

Blonde swordsman entered the scene in...

a...

chicken costume?

... Everyone mouthdropped...

"So, um.. l,g & all you freaks around, meet Gourry as a... Sweety the chick, the ringtone...yeah, who do you want to dedicate this song to?"

"I want to dedicate this song to Lina! Hi Lina!" He waved to the redhead, who desperately tried to disappear.

Gourry happily flapped his wings and started to sing:

_I may be small, _

_I may be sweet,_

"..."

_but baby,_

_I know how to move my feet!_

"..."

_Hit it!_

"..."

_Cause when I start to hear the beat, _

_I just start to move my feet _

_and that makes me wanna be _

_Sweety - tweet tweet tweet tweet_

"... ..."

* * *

And that's the end of the second chap. Hope you liked it? Impossible, I know :D

Anyway, R&R!


	3. Show yourself with song Z&A

Sigh... Getting new ideas for songs is quite hard... I spend a lot of time watching all MTVs and VIVAs I've got. So please, forgive me, if my choice seems unsuitable for you. I'll try to make it better, and... um. Suggestions welcome D

Special thanks to:

Lady Dark Angel

Mistress DragonFlame (this time I used paste & copy :- )

Nicci Rockdad

Lina Gabriev

Airi-chan ( Your ideas are great! I'll surely use them in later chapters. In that turn they have to sing songs of artist of the same sex. Tee hee...)

* * *

There was so quiet, that sound of spider hitting the ground was like shot. Not to mention, that it was a very funny look with everyone sweatdropping, muthdropping, eyes popping out and a one dead from shock spider. Okay, not dead – it would be too brutal... 

Haiiro was the first one to regain her senses.

"Oookay, thank you... Gourry. It was... umm... VERY original, now you can go and dress up in your normal clothes..."

Swordsman flapped happily his wings for the last time and went backstage. As soon as he was out of sight everyone came back to normal. After a moment Gourry was back and as he sat down he waved to Lina. She blushed and immediately looked away mumbling 'Jellyfish brains... Canary...'

"Okay, people! And others... Let's pretend that nothing's happened." Haii looked at the piece of paper she held in her hands " The next person to make an idiot of him... eckhm, to entertain us with his song is going to be..."

Everyone held his or her breath.

"Mr..."

Everyone set their eyes on Zel and Xel. Amelia and Filia sighed with relief.

"... ... Or Miss... "

Now girls tensed.

Haii smirked. "Tee hee... that's the way how my physics teacher asks. I've always wanted to do this. BUAHAHAHAHhaaaa"

Again everyone sweatdropped not understanding what was that about.

":cough:cough: Nevermind. Next one will be ZELGADIS!"

Zel stood up and unenthusiastically (what a long word...) approached to Haiiro, who handled him a few pieces of paper. As he read them he raised his eyebrow.

"Sigh... Let's say that this one" he gave to host one of cards. She snatched it from his hand and quickly read it.

"Awww... Why this one? It's not so funn..." she stopped when she saw furious Lina who held a sign with 'YOU DIDN'T LET **ME** CHOSE AGAIN, SO...' written on it. "Alright, Zel, go and change your clothes."

Zel went backstage and somehow frustrated Haiiro faced the audience.

"Alright guys, now it's..." suddenly lighting bulb appeared over her head. Devious smile appeared on her face and with maniac smile she also run out of the stage.

Lina & co sweatdropped. "And what was that about?"

"YAAAAAAAAYYY! WOHOooo... YAY :applouse:applouse:" audience was a bit backward... nevermind.

A while later Zelgadis came on stage, causing this time whole female part of audience to drool and whistle.

Zel was dressed in leather, black jacket. Moreover, it was unzipped giving a good view on his muscled chest. All guys 'humphed' looking on their drooling dates and started to plan to visit a gym more often. Chimera was also wearing black trousers and black shoes.

Amelia just couldn't take her eyes off him. Despite the fact that chimera was dresses in black, which is known to be the colour of _evil..._

HE LOOKED GREAT! Suddenly, Zel turned around and noticed her looking on him. They both blushed and quickly turned their heads.

Single person in the audience 'awwwwwwed'. Everyone turned around and saw that it was one security officer. O.o

Lina blinked "It's gettin' weird. And where is Haiiro?"

"Here I am!" Haii rushed on the stage. She looked at Zel and mouthdropped.

"Wow... eckhm. You look... great!"

"Uhum..." agreed Zel's funclub sitting at the first table. Chimera sweatdropped.

'Pretend that you haven't seen that...' he thought.

"Okay, let's start before this show gets too long. Zel, who do you want to dedicate this song to?"

Zel had the same dilemma like Lina 'All right. Lina... no. Gourry... NO. Filia... better no. She probably still has that mace. Xellos... ' chimera spat '**HELL NO!' **and than he looked at starry eyed Amelia. 'oh... Alright.'

"I will dedicate this song to Amelia"

Haii grinned deviously.

"Freaks and people! Meet Zelgadis as a... um... Green Day vocalist in the 'Boulevard of broken dreams'!"

Music started and Zelgadis started to sing:

_I walk a lonely road  
The only one that I have ever known  
Don't know where it goes  
But it's home to me and I walk alone_

„Oh, Mr. Zelgadis" sighed princess & Zel's funclub. No, my mistake. His fanclub was already lying on the ground with stars in their eyes.

_I walk this empty street  
On the Boulevard. of broken dreams  
Where the city sleeps  
And I'm the only one and I walk alone_

„Zel surely is talented..." nodded Lina. She didn't notice that Gourry seemed to sadden suddenly.

_I walk alone  
I walk alone  
I walk alone  
I walk a..._

„It's so sad, isn't it, Miss Filia?" Ame turned with tears in her eyes to dragon. Unfortunately, blonde was just gagging Xel. :sweatdrop:

_My shadows the only one that walks beside me  
My..._ **Amelia's** **heart **the only thing that's beating?  
Wha? Who? Where? How?

Amelia & Zel blushed furiously.

Haii laughed maniacally. „BUAHAHAHAHAH! KNOW THE POWER OF MY PEN YOU LOSY MORTALS!"

Zel sweatdropped and with a deep sigh continued.

_Sometimes I wish someone out there will find me  
_Yeah... someone normal...  
_Till then I walk alone _

Ah-Ah Ah-Ah Ah-Ah Ahhh  
It's so stupid.  
_Ah-Ah Ah-Ah Ah-Ah Ahhh_

_I'm walking down the line  
That divides me somewhere in my mind  
On the border line of the edge  
And where I walk alone_

_Read between the lines  
What's fucked up and everythings all right_

„Linaa what does that 'f' word mean?"

Lina blushed. „Shuddup, jellyfish brains!"  
(I found out that jellyfish has no brains. Matches Gourry perfectly, ne?)

_Check my vital signs to know I'm still alive  
And I walk alone_

_I walk alone  
I walk alone  
I walk alone  
I walk a..._

_My shadows the only one that walks beside me  
My..._ eckchm. _**Amelia's** heart the only thing that's beating  
_:sigh:  
_Sometimes I wish someone out there will find me  
Till then I walk alone_

_Ah-Ah Ah-Ah Ah-Ah Ahhh  
Ah-Ah Ah-Ah Ah-Ah Ahhh..._

OH. MY. GOD. NEVER. AGAIN.

Zelgadis finished his song and not waiting for Haii, walked off the stage.

„Wow, that was something. Does anyone want to say anything?" Haii asked

„YEES! WEEEE!" yelled whole Zel's funclub. Having no choice Haiiro approached to them. „Yes?"

The one holding the biggest 'I '_heart_' U Zel!' sign stood up.

„I'd like to say that ZEL IS THE GREATEST MAN IN THE WHOLE WORLD AND THAT YOU DON'T HAVE TO LOOK FOR YOUR CURE CUSE YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL LIKE THIS! And **leave** that Justice Princess! She's not worth you!"

„Hey!" Ame frowned.

„Ignore them." Said Zel entering the stage. His fanclub again drooled.

„I will, Mr. Zelgadis" smiled Amelia.

„AAAAwwwwwww..." security officers were very sensitive. Surprisingly, it was still the same squad as in the beginning of the show. ...  
...  
Nevermind. People and security officers DO change.

":sweatdrop: They seem to be overworked... Okay. Amelia, you're next."

Princess tensed and walked to the host. Someone in the audience yelled "Justice Rules!"

Amelia looked over her shoulder and than Haii took one card and placed it like princess was pointing at it.

"AHA! So you chose this one!" Amelia panicky looked at her 'choice'.

"Hey! It's unjustice! I haven't..."

"Nor did I..." interrupted her Lina. When Amelia saw a little fireball forming in redhead's hands she decided not to argue more...

"Alright. Ame, you can go backstage..."

When princess dissapeard Haii faced the audience

"It's time to have a talk with another couple in here! Let's say..."

She flew to one table surrounded by a thick smoke. She waved to see who's sitting there, and she saw a women with quite dark skin, long, blonde hair and round glasses on her nose. She held a cigarette in her mouth, so she was probably the cause of smoke barrier.

Next to her sat tall men with dressed in red-black coat and matching, big hat. His face was hid in shadow, but it could be seen that he had yellow, round glasses. They seemed to be really _STRANGE_...

"Umm... Hello?" women gave her a look. Haii sweatdropped. " Heh, heh... Could you tell me your names?"

Women hissed. "I'm Sir Integral Wingates Hellsing. Would you _please _leave us alone?"

Haii sweatdropped. With resign she turned to the strange man,

"And who are you?"

Man rised his head looking at her with one inhuman eye. Than, he spoke with deep voice:

"I'm Alucard, the vampire. What about joining _us_?" Shiver came through Haii's spine.

":gulp: heh heh... Maybe later?" and she quickly moved away letting the thick smoke mist to fall back. With pounding heart she walked on stage.

"Amelia, are you ready?"

"Yeees, I'm comin!"

When Amelia came on stage she was looking...

"Beautiful..." slipped from Zel's mouth. Gourry looked at him and blinked. Chimera blushed and suddenly found the opposite wall very interesting.

Amelia was also blushing, but because of the fact, that she was dressed only in black socks, black panties and black top. Lina suddenly felt very jealous about her 'shape'. Well, her costume had to be stuffed in certain place...

"Amelia, yours dedication?"

"I'd like to dedicate this song to... ummm... Zel :blush:"

Anyone notice lack of Mr:smirk:

"So all you freaks around, meet Amelia as Jennifer Lopez in 'I'm Glad!"

Music started...

"bum hit thud bum bumm"

"Ooops, wrong tune..."

This time right music...

_Baby when I think about  
The day that we first met _

"She had great face when saw you the first time, ne Zel?" mocked Lina

"Shuddup"

_Wasn't looking for what I found  
But I found you  
And I'm bound to  
Find happiness in bein' around you_

Filia and whole romantic part of audience 'awwed'  
Zelgadis's almost killed her with look.

_I'm glad when I'm makin' love to you  
I'm glad for the way you make me feel  
I love it 'cause you seem to blow my mind  
Everytime_

_I'm glad when we walk you hold my hand_

"Although he just pretends that he doesn't want her to lose and cause trouble. Or something..."

"Shuddup."

_I'm happy that you know how to be a man_

"Rather chimera" smirked Xellos  
Zelgadis simply knocked him off.

_I'm glad that you came into my life  
I'm so glad_

_I dig the way that you get down  
__(you get down and thugged out)  
__And you still know how to hold me  
Perfect_

"Wow, Zel, I didn't know that you're like that."

Lina was knocked off too.

_blend, masculine (can't get enough now)_

_I think  
I'm in love Damn, finally_

Amelia send her friends a worried look. She didn't say that she was singing about Zelgadis. She didn't also say that she's not... but that's not important...

_I'm glad  
That you  
Turned out to be  
That certain someone special  
Who makes this life  
Worth living_

"Zel, maybe you should start working as a psychiatrist?"

Chimera blinked surprised.

"You know such difficult words, Gourry?"

"Wha?

"phew... For a moment I was worried that the end of world is near..."

_I'm glad  
You're here  
Just lovin' me  
So say that you won't leave_

"See Zelgadis, stop looking for your cure and..."

He ignored the fact, that Filia is a dragon. With a heavy mace.

Statistics: 3 lying on the floor, 2 sitting, 1 singing

_'Cause since the day you came  
I've been glad_

_I'm glad when I'm makin' love to you  
I'm glad for the way you make me feel  
I love it 'cause you seem to blow my mind  
Everytime_

... No one left to comment/disturb her.

We're not counting Gourry, of course.  
_  
I'm glad when we walk you hold my hand  
I'm happy that you know how to be a man  
I'm glad that you came into my life  
I'm so glad_...

"YAAAYYY! WOWOOO :applouse:appluse:"

Amelia bowed and with a smile went backstage.

Haii came to the middle of the stage. "Does anyone want to say anything?"

"Yeeees!" yelled again the leader of Zel's funclub.

"Anyone?"

"ME!"

"No one? Come on, guys!" Suddenly she was hit by a big sign.

Fangirl came on the stage and approached to Zel.

"I'd like to say that after this song we understood that she deserves you and that we won't bother you anymore." She gave him 'pat-pat' on head and headed off. "Now I'll have to tell my boyfriend that he doesn't have to take that 'attach-rocks-to-your-skin' operation..." she worried.

: group swaetdrop:

* * *

Heh, heh. The end of 3rd chappie! I feel so tired. YAWN... some notes to Amelia's performance: 

**1.It was only song and she didn't even choose it herself.**

**2. How come everyone automatically associated text of that song with Zel?**

Those questions won't be ever answered.

Or maybe in one of the next chapters -

Suggestions free so R&R!


	4. Show yourself with song F&X

**WARNING:**

I'm sick. Yes, psychically. **No!** I mean, I am physically sick, but... Dammit.

Let's just say that I have flu and veeery bad type of running nose... And it's horror for me, because I DO NOT get sick. Surely NOT for longer than 3 days, and when I'm writing this it's the 4th day!

So I can't move ENYWHERE without big supply of handkerchiefs, my eyes are red from crying (standard part of my catarrh, I can't help it no matter how I try...), I RAVE because of fever, and so on...

So this chapter will probably turn out to be really crazy, sick etc.

Look on the bright side. There's a chance, that I'll be the first person to die from running nose...

Live with hope, mortals.

* * *

By the way, really **BIG** thanx to: 

Mistress DragonFlame  
Mwafwa  
Eien no kaze  
Lady Dark Angel  
Lina Gabriev  
Ly Mizukage - and by the way - of course I know your page! I visit it just as frequently as :D

* * *

Amelia stood silently on stage with a blush on her face and a small sweatdrop. Zel was also blushing as he sat still (like a rock **:SMASH: **...just joking...) in his chair.

„Okay lovebirds, Amelia, you can now go and change!" Haii patted her on shoulder.

„We're not love..." Ame tried desperately to deny, but Haiiro just threw her backstage.

„So, people, any comments?"

One man in the audience (which was now about half size smaller since departure of Zel's funclub) rose his hand. Girl flew to him.

"Yes?"

"Hay, babe, ya know who I am? Surely know who I am." Haii tried to interrupt, but he didn't let her "I just wanted to say, babe, tha that sweet chiccy who was there just a minute ago, yes, minute ago, I'm lookin' for chic like her, 'cause, babe, I'm the famous Ric Phal, autographs later, sweetheart, an' I'm lookin' for a chic with such figure, ya know what I mean, an' I'm making an advertisement of my new collection of furry underwear, and..."

'Fireball!'

Guy was burnt into crisp. Haiiro sweatdropped thinking **how** to hide another murder and looked at the stage.

Zelgadis was...well, more than pissed out. How _dare _that guy even think about his princess taking part in something like that? It was just... sick. Amelia would never agree. Well, the guy was lucky, that she didn't hear that.

Anyone noticed _'his'_ before the word _'princess'? ;_D

"What's going on?" Ame came back. Haii quickly hid broom and bag filled with some dust behind her back and Zel just laughed nervously.

"Heh, heh, nothing" They've said in the same time.

Ame shrugged and took her seat.

"Aaaaaaaalright people" Haiiro threw both things she held to Xellos " Next will be Filia!"

Blonde carefully, wanting not to make any unnecessary moves rose from her seat and her eyes not leaving Haii approached to her.

Xellos smirked. 'The real fun begins' he thought.

Still very carefully, Filia took all cards from host's hands and read them.

"Oh, come on. You're acting as if I'd do something to you if you made a sudden movement or something..." Haii rolled her eyes

Lina and Amelia coughed.

"I choose this one" said Filia after carefully studying one of cards. Haiiro took it from her hand and read it too.

"OK." she smiled.

"NO, WAIT!" ex-priestess snatched it from surprised girl's hand and read it again.

"What's the matter?"

"If you agreed WITHOUT any complains, it means that there is SOMETHING in this song!" and Filia came back to studying the text again.

"Maybe magnifying glass?" blonde jumped away when she saw unnaturally magnified amethyst eye next to her face. Than, regaining her senses and slowing her pulse, she...

"Thanks." ..Snatched it from Xel's hand and looked with it at the paper.

"Hay, there's nothing in that text. You chose it, you sing it! Simple." Haiiro shrugged. Filia send her a suspicious look and with a sigh handled her back card with her song. Before girl started her talk, blonde went backstage.

"Aww.. she's not fun." She looked at Xel who still stood at the stage, with a shock on his face and a broom and bag still in his hands. "Umm, hello? You can sit down now."

"What? Who? Where? It's a secret! ... what?" mazoku blinked in Gourry's style.

"Nevermind... To make this show more interesting, I'm not going to have an interview with any of you boring guys out there, so for a while you can go and use our buffet!"

"EAT!" Gourry and Lina yelled in unite and they, among with whole audience, security and odd people who shown up hearing 'buffet', run in food's direction. Room was now completely empty ( Zel and Amelia were took along with crowd and Xellos was probably off to spy on Filia).

"Heh heh... Now, let's take advantage of the situation and have a **crazy self-talk**" Haii grinned and quickly with her ALMIGHTY PEN she drew a simple face on her left hand.

"Finally, I've thought that we will never talk again. So, can I ask you one question?"

"Sure."

"Why you let Filia with that non-embarrassing song?"

"I've..."

"You didn't even **try** to change the lyrics like you did with Zel's song!"

"She took the lyrics with her..."

"Dammit! So what are you going to do NOW?"

"Let me finish. I didn't do anything 'bout Filia's lyrics, because I hope that certain mazoku's gonna do it for me."

"Aahhh... crafty one..."

In this moment Xel teleported back on the stage. He was drooling and blushing like mad.

Left-hand man looked at Haii worryingly (how could he? No idea. )

"I don't even want to know where he was and what he saw."

After a hour of running around and trying to collect everyone, chasing them with torches, forks, shovels, physics workbooks and accidentally running into Zelgadis and Amelia who seemed to have a closer moment... not that anything happen... but who knows what _would _if she run into them ten minutes later...

Anyway, after all that everyone sat in their places, even Xel (still with broom in his hand, dust from bag was spilled in the corner of the room), and Haiiro got ready to present Filia.

"So. All ya too-hungry-to-come freaks around. I'd like to present Filia ul Copt as Natasha Bedingfield in the song "Unwritten"!"

"Yaay... ... woohoo... :clasp:clasp: " audience was burnt, hurt etc. Do not expect too much of them...

All lights directed on the entrance to the stage. When Filia entered whole male part of the audience went crazy:

"yaa... :clasp:clasp: ... cough... cough..."

... as I said before, don't expect too much...

Xellos turned his had slowly to look at dragon and he froze.

As he studied her, from her slim legs, through knee-length, green dress, black top sticking from under it, to her face, he felt that he's heart started to beat faster.

Actually his heart was in a fridge X miles away on the Wolfpack Island, but mazoku always kept in touch with it, so he knew. Simple.

'She IS beautiful...' he whispered to himself. Thankfully for him, sitting closest to him Amelia was now concentrated on what had nearly happened in that room before that freak with rubber chicken came in... but that later. So she didn't hear that rather _amusing_ comment.

(Read it slowly... I missed sense of this sentence in the midway, but I'm sure that it's still quite understandable...)

"Filia, who do you want to dedicate this song to?"

'that question...'

Xellos made puppy eyes "Dedicate it to me! Pleaaaaaaase?" he mocked.

Filia twitched. 'Just calm down, just calm down... Okay. I have 5 peopl...person to choose from. Lina... would fireball me. Gourry... Lina would fireball me later, Amelia...' she looked at her and noticed, that princess was now pretending that she's NOT looking at certain chimera, and that certain chimera was pretending that he does NOT see it. She sweatdropped.

":sigh: I'd like to dedicate this song to the only person left, to one lousy, stinking, awful and annoying Namagomi."

"Hey!" mentioned above frowned.

Music started and Filia began to sing.

I_ am unwritten, can't read my mind, I'm undefined_

Nods from all around. Filia twitched.  
_  
I'm just beginning, the pen's in my hand, ending unplanned Staring at the blank page before you  
Open up the dirty window _

„Dirty? Miss Filia is too obsessed with cleaning for that... Not like some people I know..." princess glanced at Lina.

„What was THAT supposed to mean?"  
_  
Let the sun illuminate the words that you could not find _

Reaching for something in the distance  
So close you can almost taste it

"Like when we gave her a carrot on a stick to make her fly faster!"

_:twitch:  
Release your inhibitions  
__  
Feel the rain on your skin _

Suddenly, everyone heard loud 'boom!' and dark clouds started to gather over Filia's head. Blonde blinked and than a heavy rain fell on her skin. Knowing WHO's to be accused of this, she took her mace, turned to Xellos and threw it at him yelling 'NAMAGOMI!'

He was crying on the floor from laughter, so didn't even see this coming.

He wasn't too horrified when Filia's mace rammed into his head either.

_No one else can feel it for you  
Only you can let it in  
No one else, no one else  
_...Has the strength to smash his lousy face...  
_Can speak the words on your lips  
__  
Drench yourself in words unspoken  
Live your life with arms wide open _

**:boom:** lighting struck the microphone sending a lot of sparks all around. Ex-priestess just sighed and continued.  
_  
Today is where your book begins  
The rest is still unwritten _

Oh, oh, oh

I break tradition, sometimes my tries, are outside the lines  
We've been conditioned to not make mistakes, but I can't live that way

"It suits her. Well, she rejected being a priestess, didn't she?" Lina looked over Gourry at Zel. He nodded and Gourry glanced from one to another, somehow disappointed that they weren't talking to him. By the way, it's rude to ignore the person next to you and talk with another one.

Staring at the blank page before you  
Open up the dirty window  
Let the sun illuminate the words that you could not find

Redhead felt someone poking at her arm. She turned to see that it was Gourry.  
_  
Reaching for something in the distance  
So close you can almost taste it  
Release your inhibitions  
Feel the rain on your skin _

"Hay, umm... you know, that part about inibitions is good too. Isn't it? Suits her, ne?" he gave Lina an innocent look.

"Yes, your right." She smiled, and seeing this so did he. Than, they both came back to watching Filia.  
_  
No one else can feel it for you  
Only you can let it in  
No one else, no one else  
Can speak the words on your lips _

"And by the way Gourry, it's in**h**ibitions." She chuckled.

Gourry sighed. 'I can't do anything right.' He thought..

:Place for big 'aaaaaaaawww' and moment I should stop writing until my temperature is normal again... no chance. So I continue, buahahahahaa...' :

_Drench yourself in words unspoken  
Live your life with arms wide open  
Today is where your book begins_

_Feel the rain on your skin  
No one else can feel it for you_

Unnoticed, Xel clutched the broomstick as he watched Filia's performance. Well, by this time rain had made her clothes really wet, so they clang to her body leaving very little to imagination...

_Only you can let it in  
No one else, no one else  
Can speak the words on your lips_

Amelia turned around thinking that she hadn't heard Xellos for a while. Surprisingly, she found him staring fascinated at blonde on stage.

:sweatdrop:'umm.. better not disturb him now...' she thought

_Drench yourself in words unspoken  
Live your life with arms wide open  
Today is where your book begins  
The rest is still unwritten..._

"Great!" yelled Haiiro, supported by applause of audience.

Even Xel realised suddenly that he's clasping too. Strange...

Filia went backstage to change and Xellos quickly teleported himself to Haii's side.

"And what do you have for me?"

Girl simply handled him two cards.

"Two? Don't you think that I should have more to choose from?"

"Nope." She grinned sheepishly.

With a sigh mazoku read the first one. His eyes widened and a devious smile appeared on his face.

"I take this one!" he handed it to Haiiro. She also smiled.

"I just knew you'll like this one... So you can go and change."

He nodded and teleported away.

...hey...

...wait...

...but...

Something was wrong.

...hmmmmmmmmmmmmm...

"XEL! THERE IS ONLY ONE CHANGING ROOM AND FILIA ISN'T BACK YET!"

**:BOOM:SMACK:**

And so Xellos was back with his beloved broom crashed on his head.

Moments later Filia got back, red both from anger and embarrassment.

"You deserved that..." she mumbled 'accidentally' stomping on Xel's face.

"Itaii..." he coughed up and weakly stood up. "Anyway, I have something that belongs to you" he smirked and took from his sleeve... red bra.

Filia flushed and put a hand on her back to check if her bra was there...

"NAMAGOMI! HOW? JUST A MOMENT AGO I WAS WEARING IT I'M SURE!"

Gourry blinked. "What a frivolous underwear, Filia..."

Lina smacked him with her fist.

Angry blonde snatched her underwear from Xel's hand, sent him with a kick backstage and sat on her armchair. One man from security, who just happened to walk beside her, patted her on shoulder, slipping a 10 dollars banknote and his phone number behind her neckline.

Ex-priestess couldn't blush more so she just smashed the guy with her bra yelling "HENTAI! PERVERT!"

Haiiro sweatdropped again. 'Next time when I'll be hiring security I'll read those notes about possible behaviour.'

Minutes later, there could he heard footsteps which were sign, that Xellos is ready.

Lights in the room dimmed.

Haii went to the middle of the stage.

"Ladies and gentlemen, I'd like to present you..."

footsteps were now louder:

tap... tap... tap... **boom**..."Damn shoes.. I can't even walk in them..." ... tap.. tap...

"Xellos Metallium as Right Said Fred in..."

Mazoku entered the stage. He had his hair tousled (so-called 'artistic chaos') and he was dressed in deep red shirt, black trousers and... Strange, black leather shoes with a little high-heel. He had also black hat on his head. Despite that strange combination – he looked sexy. ;)

All lights directed on him and he sent an alluring smile to the audience.

"Yaaayyy! Wohooo:applouse:applouse:"

Few girls fainted, but no one took care of them. People can be so mean...

Again breaking Haii's fun, Xellos snatched the microphone from her hand before she managed to say anything.

"I'd like to dedicate this song to Filia..." he pointed at her and not jealous part of the room applauded. Others just 'hmpf'ed.

"The most beautiful, nice and amazing..." Ex-priestess blushed.

"...dragoness with really nice body and breast size..." he was cut by Haiiro's fist in his head.

"Give me that back." She took microphone. "Sing before something bad happens to you."

Gourry tried to think for a while.

"Lina, how does he know Filia's body that well?"

Lina smirked deviously and making sure that Filia can't hear her said "He probably often sneaks to her room at night..."

"Miss Lina! What kind of dirty thoughts are these!" appalled Amelia

Xellos sighed and music started.

"But what's the title of this song?" yelled Lina

_I'm too sexy for my love too sexy for my love  
Love's going to leave me  
_

Everyone sweatdropped.

„After this song Filia surely will..." mumbled Lina.

Thankfully, dragon didn't hear that. She was to shocked. And by the way, she couldn't take her eyes off him... not only from shock ;)

_I'm too sexy for my shirt too sexy for my shirt _

Xel started to strip, what made whole famine part (and a few men) drool. Zelgadis protectively covered Amelia's eyes and Lina just turned around too ashamed to look at the stage.

Gourry again proved his lack of brain and happy-go-luckily went to sleep.

_So sexy it hurts  
And I'm too sexy for Milan too sexy for Milan  
New York and Japan_

_And I'm too sexy for your party  
Too sexy for your party  
No way I'm disco dancing _

Suddenly, mazoku took sunglasses a'la Elvis and started to dance on stage, moving his hips in.. very certain way. Audience 'wohooo'ed and Xel sent a look to Filia.

Dragoness blushed deeply and looked away.

_I'm a model you know what I mean  
And I do my little turn on the catwalk  
Yeah on the catwalk on the catwalk yeah  
I do my little turn on the catwalk_

Xellos made a walk as if he really was a model and winked to the audience.

_I'm too sexy for my car too sexy for my car  
Too sexy by far  
And I'm too sexy for my hat  
Too sexy for my hat what do you think about that_

He threw his hat in the air spectacularly. Pitifully, it didn't make anything like 'flying with grace and landing on someone's head', but it made a big hole in the wall and flew into the space.

_I'm a model you know what I mean  
And I do my little turn on the catwalk  
Yeah on the catwalk on the catwalk yeah  
I shake my little touche on the catwalk_

Suddenly, Filia rose from her armchair. Xellos stopped singing and looked at her puzzled.

She had half-closed eyes and wore a seductive smile on her face. She made her way to him, moving her hips in the way that made mazoku feel as if suddenly someone turned on the heating.

Haiiro crouched next to the radiator.  
"What?"

Filia approached to sweatdropping Xellos and put a hand on his shoulder.

"You know what?" she purred "I just wanted to tell you now, that... maybe we could meet somewhere after this?" she continued sweetly "In case I forgot later..." unnoticed, she slipped on Xel's lyrics a piece of paper.

Mazoku swallowed hardly. "Um, Filia?" then realising his chance he returned his usual, mocking smile. "As you wish"

She just smiled in return and went back to her place. Xellos sent her one final look and continued to sing, not noticing a little 'extra' she gave him.

_I'm too sexy for my brain too sexy for my brain...  
__Too sexy for my brain...HEY!_

Filia and Zelgadis started to laugh maniacally and they shook their hands congratulating their idea. Xellos just twitched coming back to his.. 'cough'cough'... normal lyrics..

_'Cos I'm a model you know what I mean  
And I do my little turn on the catwalk  
Yeah on the catwalk on the catwalk yeah  
I shake my little touche on the catwalk_

_I'm too sexy for my cat too sexy for my cat  
Poor pussy poor pussy cat_

Xel took a cat from nowhere and threw it to the audience.

And because that cat can't die (or I'll have police on my back) all mazoku's fangirls jumped to catch it.

One of them, Helga Milyanowa, who was... um.. you can say a big girl, with red pigtails and freckles all over her body, picked up a table and cleared her way with it. Than, she caught flying cat and yelled

"Yeah, Xelly's kitty is mine! Hahaha **haaaaaark** hahaha!"

Xellos paused and sweatdropped.

"Poor pussy cat..." he said. Than, trying to ignore his... big fangirl, he continued.

_I'm too sexy for my love too sexy for my love  
Love's going to leave me _

Tears came to Helga's eyes.

"You want to leave me? After all we've been through? After you gave me your kitty?"

'Kitty' desperately tried to free himself or at least to catch breath.

"You... You... BASTARD! All men are the same!" she ran out with cry, leaving poor animal behind.

Unnoticed, Filia took cat in her arms and went backstage, nestling it carefully...

And I'm too sexy for this song...

Xellos bowed and whole audience stood up clasping, whistling and doing all crazy things to show their enthusiasm. But Xellos, playin 'hard guy' ignored his whole fanclub and looked in Filia's direction. But her chair was empty!

Not noticing battle that started on stage (there was no more security left and Xel's fangirls wanted to capture the stage. Lina and co had to do something. Otherwise buffet would be lost...)

Xellos went to the dark labyrinth of backstage and suddenly he heard Filia's voice. He opened the door and he saw ex-priestess sitting on the floor and stoking the cat.

"...umm.. knock knock?" he said with big smile.

"MMEeeeeaaaaaowth!" animal was still in big trauma and hearing suddenly someone's voice it jumped in the air and started running around the room. Surprised Xel clumsily tried to catch it, but cat just made use of space between his legs and run from the room.

Filia stood up angrily.

"What have you done, namagomi!" she yelled "Now I won't find him!"

She quickly went to the corridor lookin' for kitty.

"Xelly, Xelly, whre are you! Hey, kitty, kitty..." she yelled

Xellos was astonished.

"Filia?"

"What!" she turned around

"... you... named that cat after me?"

* * *

Naaah... it took me forever to write everything down. I've nearly got rid of whole sickness (sorry, it seems that I won't die. Not from flu, at least. Now.), but I still rave more than usual. And you should hear my voice - my friends've had great laughs from me past few days... Andbefore I ended this chapter I wrote and sent my homework to my English teacher (it's nice to have a teacher to whom you can send you homeworks at e-mail), so I've had enough English for today. Nice language but... Today I've had ANOTHER dream in English! That'll be the THIRD ONE! Omg... End. 

Of course R&R! I'll try to make next chap more 'sane'. I promise. And I wouldn't mind suggestions... tee hee.

And something what _maybe_ will cheer you up - I've already started working on next chapter.


	5. Heh heh lunch break?

Hello. As I promised I'll try to make this chappy more sane.

Or maybe not.

Pity that I don't keep my words, ne?

Btw, This chapter is going to be... umm... strange. Surprised? Well, stranger then previous chapters... and... umm... oh well.

Believe me it hurts me more than you.

And one more thing. Nooo, I'm not writing this because I don't have more ideas for songs. Or maybe it's a reason too, but... Oh well. I AM a very abstract person, so I don't have to have a reason to do something, do I?

**And as usual, special thanx to all who reviewed:**

Kindall

Lina Gabriev (wow, what a long review... answers at the bottom. Glad that you read so carefully  )

Airi (Than? ... nie zauwarzyłam, dzięki  btw, przez 'a' wyglada ladniej ;P he he)

Mwafwa

Rukia sama (triple ;) or 4 times?)

Chibifairy

E.J.A Roberts

Thaaaaaank you!

* * *

After long (about 10min) battle Lina decided that's time for some serious steps...

Thankfully, just when she was about to Dragon Slave crazy fangirls, Xellos decided to show up. His fanclub immediately stopped attacking the rest and jumped on sweatdropping priest, covering him completely.

"Maybe we should help him?" suggested Amelia looking at pile of excited fans.

"Naaah.." Lina waved her hand "He can handle it himself. By the way..."

Suddenly pile dissapeard and after a moment Xellos teleported back, these time alone. His clothes were torn and he was covered with various shades of lipstick.

"They... were... terrible.." he managed to spill out and fell on the ground.

"Oh." Haiiro looked at him worryingly. "Where have you left them?"

"In the place where they'd be more of use..."

_Meanwhile, on Britney's concert..._

Britney was standing on the stage, about to start on of her 'songs', when suddenly pile of Xel's fangirls fell on her head.

WHAT a pity, she won't get out of it soon.. if ever.

**Buahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha...**

_Back to Slayers..._

"Oh...Nevermind" Lina shook her head. "So where is our prize?"

"What?" Haii scratched her head "What are you talking about?" (Very Gourry-like, eh?)

"Prize? We did what you wanted and you promised to make our wishes come true! So?" redhead was starting to loose her patience

"Oh, yes. Your wishes, but..." girl got suddenly more nervous "I didn't say that's the end. You still have a few songs to sing."

"Whaaaaaaaaaaatttt?" yelled slayers

"Um... tee hee... I didn't tell you? So... Um..." Haiiro sweatdropped seeing Lina preparing Dragon Slave for her "Ummm... LUNCH BREAK!"

Hearing these two magical words Lina immediately left Haii and with Gourry few steps behind her, she run to buffet. So did whole audience. When you hear 'free food' it's hard to control yourself...

"It made the trick" said Haii happily, having regained hope to live a few years more.

Then she looked around. Her studio was devastated, audience was half-dead, half-empty, and well...

"Okay, I have about a hour to repair this and to hire new security. Sigh, and I thought that I'll be the one to have fun from it..."

Amelia and Zel quickly found Lina and Gourry (next to the buffet, of course), but Xel and Filia were nowhere to be seen. The rest of the gang decided to ignore it and peacefully spend this time.

Due to fact, that they've eaten a just a while ago, it wasn't long before redhead and her companion filled their stomachs. Then, they calmly sat in their chairs, not even bothering to have a conversation or something. Besides, they had some thinking to do...

Lina glanced at blonde swordsmen sitting next to her. He was simply staring through the window, probably thinking about birds and trees or something, thought redhead. But well, sometimes he acted as if he was able to think. And well, hard to admit for her, but he **was **handsome, even with his dumb expression on his face.

'Strange that he doesn't have a fanclub like Zelgadis and Xellos." wondered Lina.

She didn't know that Gourry's fanclub decided to act just as their idol, so in result they landed in the middle of Norway instead of the studio. Just as Gourry would at their place...

In this moment swordsman sensed that someone's watching him. He turned his head to meet Lina's gaze. She quickly looked away, small blush on her face. Swordsmen blinked confused. 'Women are strange...' he thought. But at the same time, he felt some warm in his chest. 'Is it because of Lina? ... ... ... What was I thinking of? Oh yeah, birds and trees...'

_Meanwhile..._

Haii looked at workers moving around and trying to put everything in their place. Work was going well, despite the fact that she decided to rent the cheapest equip. Tape is good for everything, isn't it? Well, when everything is going well, it's time to hire some security. She **needed **specialists...

_Back to Slayers..._

Amelia was chewing a cookie. She wasn't really hungry, but well... there was surely a lot before her, and she didn't eat anything during last break, because...

She glanced at certain chimera siting next to her and sipping his coffee. During last break...

_Flashback_

Amelia looked around. Backstage seemed to be so small, but it was real labyrinth! Slowly she started to be afraid, that she wouldn't get out of there. Hopefully she opened another door and went in, but it happened to be just another empty room. Well, not so empty. When she gave it a closer look, she saw that it was some kind of an old wardrobe. Or maybe a room... There was big, dusted closet with large mirror where she hardly saw her face. In the other corner of the room stood large, heavy bed. Princess delicately touched it and than she heard someone enter the room. She quickly turned around to see...

Zelgadis.

"Amelia?" he spoke in soft voice "What are you doing in here?"

"Well, umm...I kind of got lost..." she blushed slightly. Oh, her clumsiness... "And what are you doing in here?"

Now Zel seemed to get a bit nervous. "I... ummm... I saw that Lina and Gourry were running to buffet and I didn't saw you with them, so I thought that I'll... walk around and maybe I'll find you by chance" he smiled slightly.

Then there was silence for a wile...

"Zelgadis? I... you had a nice performance" she smiled at him.

"Oh,.. thanks. You sang good too." He replied.

...  
...

"And you... ekchm... looked cute in those clothes..." he mumbled blushing slightly. Ame looked at him amazed.

"Thank you..."  
...  
...  
...

It is damn hard to talk with someone you _like _when you're alone, isn't it?  
...  
...

"Well, your performance made those girls from your fanclub crazy, it can be considered as big compliment..."

"Yeah, but I don't know if I should be happy that there are people like that brething the same air..."

Amelia chuckled. "But at least you know that there are people who like you the way you are, and..." Zel looked at her amazed "... I... I think the same."

"Really?" Zel didn't know what to say. Unconsciously, he made a step towards Amelia.

"Yes..." Ame blushed more "And... By the way I think you look nice like that..." she rose her eyes, just to see that Zelgadis is looking at her with eyes wide open. Than he smiled softly.

"Thank you Amelia." Not realising that, she stepped towards him, so did he, and when they were not more than ten inches away from each other...

"**HEY YOU TWO! GO BACK TO STAGE, NOW!"** They quickly jumped away from each other blushing furiously and saw Haiiro with rubber chicken in her hand standing in the entrance.

Haii looked at them and, after quick thinking process, her eyes widened.

"Ups..." she scratched back of her head. "Anyways, be back to stage in five minutes, okay?" and she quickly withdrew from the room.

_End flashback..._

Amelia sighed and glanced at Zel again. 'If not her...' she thought...

_Back to Haii..._

"So you say that you're good at fighting, aren't you?"

"Yes, I'm a superhero, and I have great power!" said men who was dressed in blue costume and, well... he seemed not to fit in the chair.

"So what would you do it you saw a fight taking place on the stage?"

"SPOON!" yelled men and stood up, chair still stuck to the place where back looses his noble name.

Haii sweatdropped. "Okay, I hire you. :sigh:" Strange man in blue costume smiled and went away to get his security uniform.

_Again back to Slayers..._

Zelgadis held his cup in hand though it was already empty. He also thought about his little 'wardrobe adventure'.

'It that freak didn't come in, we'd...No, clear your mind, clear your mind, no dirty thoughts, clear your mind, exhale...inhale...exhale...inhale. ... What the hell was that?' he wondered and send a glance at the princess sitting next to him. At the moment he did it she quickly turned away, what meant that she was looking at him second ago. Could this mean...'

"By the way, where are Filia and Xellos?" Gourry interrupted his and other's thoughts.

"Good question... but we probably don't want to know the answer." Said Lina

_To make you loose the track of this chapter, we're going _

_AGAIN to Haii..._

Haiiro was still sitting in the same room having interviews with another man, who wanted to be a security officer.

"What can you tell me 'bout yourself, Mr...?"

"Zangulus."

Girl looked at him for few seconds, minutes...

"You've that guy who fought with Gourry! With that stupid hat!"

Zangulus sweatdropped. "Yeah, so?"

"Weren't you supposed to be king or something? With Martina or what was her name as your wife?"

"Yeah, but... uhm... I just felt like getting away for a while. Sometimes she can be a real pain in..."

"Okay, okay, I understand. But aren't you afraid of leaving her alone?"

"Why should I?"

Haii sweatdropped. "Nevermind. I hire you."

_To make things more complicate, lets jump to Filia and Xel..._

Filia was still crouching around looking for Xel. The cat.

Other Xel just found himself teleporting behind her back.

"GAAAAAAAAAAAHHH! WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?"

"Umm... Teleporting, I think so." Answered mazoku with stupid smile on his face.

Filia just sighed. That was SO embarrassing. Not only her cat's run away, but also she had to explain to that filth why she'd named that cat Xel... Damn, what was she thinking...

Xellos smiled darkly as he felt waves of confusion coming from Filia's mind. Tasty...

Mazoku knew she was thinking about her cat. Pitifully not about him, but still... hey, where did that 'pitifully' come from? Oh well...

_Flashback (again)(I almost lost hope that anyone will read this without losing his track)_

"... you named that cat after me?"

There was an awkward silence.

Filia's eyes widened as she realised what'd happened.

"I... um... oh..." she didn't know how to explain herself. And actually why she did this?

"Well...it was your cat... and well... it kindda reminded me of you. Ya know, he has such... nice amethyst eyes..." she smiled sheepishly.

"Oh." Simply stated Xellos. He was too surprised with the answer to tease her now.

"So... would you help me find my cat?" asked Filia innocently.

"Sure. I'll be back in a while." Xellos had a sick feeling because of all that emotions coming from Filia now, and he could sense something happening on the stage. Like a battle or something...

_End flashback_

_And this time jump to Lina & co._

"Hey, guys. Let's play a game!" suddenly yelled Gourry, making Lina fell from her chair.

Red head angrily stood up and smacked him lightly "Don't do that again, okay!"

"Sure." He stroked his head.

"Good idea, Mr Gourry. But what we should play?"

"Maybe hangman?" said Zel as optimistically as always.

"Zelgadis!" yelled Amelia "Maybe something else?"

"Oh, I don't know. I don't feel like playing anyway." Lina stretched her arms and settled herself on her chair.

Amelia sighed. So it seems that they won't play...

"On the other hand it starts to be boring just sitting here." Suddenly said Zel

Princess rose her head surprised.

"Maybe a card game?"

"Okay! But we'll play for money." Jumped Lina excited by this idea.

Zelgadis frowned. He didn't like this idea. But :sigh: how could he let Amelia down?

Now jump to Haii...

Everything was going well by now. She already hired 5 men and none of them seemed to be a mass murder, terrible pervert or fan of stupid music.

Next candidate seemed to be nice men either. He had thick glasses, but not seemed to be a wimp either.

"Hello. What's your name?"

"Zachary. Zachary Clark."

(It you feel as if you've heard that name before, this means that you've watched 'Godsend'. Watched this film today on my English class. Don't worry – I took only name from this film, no need to know the plot.)

"Okay. So what would you do if you saw a battle starting on the stage?"

Man/boy/whatever simply looked at the pile of paper on her desk. It stared to burn.

Haii's eyes widened. "Okay... and what else can you do?"

"I think that we don't understand ourselves. I need money. Wasn't that enough for you?"

In that moment fire grown up.

Haii narrowed her eyes. "Umm..yes?"

"I'm glad." Then he stood up and without any noise left the room.

In that moment girl realised that she was holding her breath. "Yaaaahhhhrk... oh my... And here goes my plan to hire only normal person. :sigh:"

She put down fire in her bureau and yelled for next guy to come in. If she'll be lucky, Zachary'll be the only 'dangerous' person in her security.

_Jump to Filia and Xellos..._

They've swept about 50 rooms by now looking for cat. Knowing Xellos it could seem strange, that he's helping her. But on the other side... for a masochist like Xellos...

"Dammit! Xellos, you filthy mazoku! It's all your fault! Just wait till I find my kitty..."

She hissed crawling under another table.

"Are you here, darling?" Xellos twitched "Come to mommy... kitty?"

"MEAAOWTH!" suddenly cat jumped on her face, Filia tried to get herself out and stand on her legs. Then, she saw what was the reason of cat's reaction...

"RAAAAAAATS!" she yelled and jumped in Xel's arms. Stream of these nice... ekchm... 'terrible' and bloodthirsty animals started to run around the room covering whole floor.

"RATS! Getmeoutofhere, getmeoutofhere, getmeoutofhere!"

Xellos blinked confused by her reaction, but submissively teleported them another room.

Filia for a moment tried to catch her breath, and then she jumped off and..."Oh thank you! Thankyou, thankyou, thankyou! You saved us from rats! My hero!" she wrapped her arms around his neck cuddling up to him. "I don't know how to thank you! You are wonderful! And..."

"Filia?"

Dragoness turned her head to see that she stands in the middle of buffet room, next to Lina's and co table, everyone staring at her. And she hangs on her worst enemy's neck.

She wanted to scream, yell, and run away at the same moment, so instead she just passed out, but before she hit the floor Xellos caught her with one hand.

The rest of Slayers crew stared at them in disbelief. It was at least shocking that they two appeared there TOGETHER, IN EACH OTHER'S ARMS.

"What the hell were you doing?"

Xellos winked " It's our sweet little secret."

"**ATTENTION PLEASE!"** everyone turned their heads to see Haiiro with big bullhorn **"Show starts in 2 minutes! And I'd like to see everyone in their places by then or..."**

Everyone took the hint and headed to the stage. Lina, still in great state of shock also got up and in weak voice said:

"Come on, guys."

They didn't felt like saying 'no', so Zel and Amelia also got up and followed Lina.

Gourry looked at them, then at big pile of money that stood on the table next to where Lina's sat. Than he looked back at Lina, then at money.

"Wait for me!" he yelled after them leaving money back.

Minute after they left, strange women with purple hair and fringe covering her eyes passed by that table cleaning a glass.

":sigh: another hard day in work..." suddenly, she noticed money on the table.

Her eyes widened. "What a big tip! No one sees me? " she glanced around "No one sees me..." and she started to stuff her pockets, socks, shoes and bra with gold pieces.

"Hah! Now I'm going to Bahamas! But first..." she glanced around " I'll have to inquire WHO sat here... _Maybe it was tall, young and handsome men, who liked me that much, that he left all that money for me... " _She said with dreamy voice...

_I__t's the last jump in this story. Really:) Meanwhile, on the __stage..._

Everyone, remembering last break's events, managed to get to their places in time.

Slayers also sat in their armchairs, Lina mad, Gourry with black eye, Amelia with worried look in her face, Zel inscrutable as always and Filia with Xel sitting in her lap.

Xel the cat of course.

Other Xel sat in the last armchair with a black eye like Gourry. Say, that Filia wasn't too pleased when she woke up in his arms... Nor was Lina, when she remembered her money... Thankfully for her it was mostly Amelia's cash.

"Daddy's gonna kill me..." mumbled princess.

"Welcome back, people! Firstly, I'd like to present you our new security squad!"

The Tick, new security officer, (the 'SPOON man! Come on, you had to see at least ONE episode...) waved to the audience, but others didn't.

Haii's fears came true, when Zachary wasn't the last to **make** her hire him.

She still had some fleas running over her. :scratch:scratch:

"Isn't that Zangulus?" asked Zelgadis pointing at figure standing in shadow.

Amelia came back to reality and looked at that direction. "Indeed, it's hard to forget that hat..." she said.

Lina also turned around. "Hay, Zangulus!"

Man slowly stepped in full light. "Hi, guys. I wasn't expecting you here. How are you?"

"Fine, at least now" she glanced at Haii "And what about you? Where's Martina?"

Guy waved his hand "Oh, she stayed in her kingdom."

"And you weren't afraid to leave her alone?"

"**Why everyone keeps asking me that question?"**

"Knowing Martina she'll.. oh nevermind."

Zangulus shrugged and came back to his place. Haiiro stepped out with microphone in her hand.

"So. Now we're starting round two of our show!" she paused dramatically.

Silence.

"Damned audience... so, in round two our contestants are supposed to..."

"YAAAAAAAAAYYYYY! WOHOOOOO:applause:"

"... I hate you... are supposed to sing a song that fits to them the best, but this time... They'll have to sing a song of singer of different sex!"

... silence... that one person from the audience asked "What?"

"Naaah.. you people are SO thick. I'll show you." She took Gourry by ear at dragged him to the middle of scene." This is a man. He'll have to sing a song, which is originally singed by a woman! Understand?"

"AAAaahhhh..." audience understood.

"Well, Gourry, if you're here already, you'll be the first. Pick a song."

"Wait a minute. You mean a **_'girl's song'_**?" swordsman said

"Yeah, that's what I've said."

"Oh." And he looked at the list she gave him. Than he scratched his head and Haii again started to wonder if he could read.

"May I ask you something?" suddenly he whispered in her ear.

'Here it goes.' She thought and nodded.

"So.. "he looked very confused "which do you think..."

Haiiro rose her eyebrow.  
...

"...Lina'll like the best?"

* * *

Sorry I haven't put any songs in this chapter. You know how hard it is to find a song for Gourry? Oh well.. back to searching. Will try to write next chap in short time. It will be difficult, considering the fact, that the end of year is close. My parents gonna KILL ME because of my notes... Damn...

Answers to Lina's Gabriev questions.

_Why would Lina fireball her? Oh and can they dedicate them simply to their "friends"  
_- Ha! This would be too easy :) Why not to Lina? Well, call me strange, but I'm greatly aware of girl-girl and man-man situations and I try to avoid them as much as I can. It's just... oh well. I'm strange :)

_This might be a stupid question but what was your thinking when you assigned this song to her. Why is she considered "unwritten", I suppose is what I'm trying to ask.  
-_What was I thinking... good question. Actually, what got into me to do this was vision of Xellos bringing storm while she sang it. The rest just... came. I'm very abstract person, I rarely understand myself :)

_That whole inhibitions scene...Gourry didn't know what to tell Lina before he tapped her did he? Because after he tapped her, Filia sang that inhibitions line, and then and ONLY THEN did Gourry tell Lina about it.  
-_Exactly. He wanted to get some attention from her. (Awwwww..)

_Poor Gourry. Is there a round two to this sing thing?  
__-_This chapter should answer :)

_You did that thing again where you refer to them as Angry blonde is their name, like Chimera. If you really wanted to say angry blond, shouldn't you say "The" Angry Blond? Just a minor quibble_.  
-Heh heh... I probably mentioned that so many times that you already hate me, but again I'll say that I'm not good in English. (Don't ask me why I'm writing.) and well.. sometimes lack of synonyms makes me make such stupid mistakes :) forget me... please? And my heart is not in making Airi check my :cough:cough: "work". I have myself a lot of work, learning etc. Don't want to bother anyone :)

_How do you smash a guy with a bra? oO  
-_Another good question. ... ... I don't know. I haven't tried yet :)_  
__  
Ouchies. That was pretty harsh. I guess you aren't a Gourry fan._  
–It's not like that, it's just... oh. Well, I can't say that I'm his fan like it's in Zel's of Xel's case, but I like him. But there has to be someone enough stupid to make fun of him. I have no brain either and in a lot situations I'm afraid I'd act the same like Gourry. _Scary...  
_But I like him :)

If you have any questions e-mail me or, if you want, put them in reviews. I'll try to answer them, but sometimes, I'm afraid, I'll have no choice, but to break Xel's copyright and say 'It's secret!" :)


	6. Other sex song G&L

Hello...

All I wanted to say is that now I'm experiencing goods of veeery stressful life – school year ends in less that a month and my notes/marks/whatever are not as good as they used to be... And because of that I'm probably breaking a record of number of bans... sad...

Anyways, I'm trying very hard to both learn a lot and not forget about this story...

So. Read this chapter and review!

* * *

As usual special thanx to all who reviewed. Answers to eventual questions at the bottom : )

Lady Dark Angel

Nicci Rockdad

Rukia-sama

E.J.A Roberts

Mwafwa

Lina Gabriev

You keep me alive!

Well. Almost.

* * *

Haiiro blinked twice, unsure whether he said what she's heard.

"WHAT?"

To further surprise he 'sheeshed' quieting her and repeated his question.

"Which of those song you think Lina'll like the best? I think I made her mad with that chicken song, you know" and he gave her his sheepish look.

"Umm..I...excuse me please!" Girl suddenly run off backstage, leaving more than usual confused Gourry and the rest of Slayers. "I'll be back in a minute!"

Behind the stage Haiiri leant against the wall breathing heavily.

'Those pleading eyes, full of trust... What am I supposed to do? I have this absolutely humiliating song" she glanced at the piece of paper she still had in her hand. One title was written with big letters and red ink ' But he trusts me... So what should I do?"

Suddenly, Haii's little copy, only with horns, tail and red fork appeared with 'puff' next to her head. (You know, in cartoons evil side is represented by devil and good with angel. That stuff)

"You know what you should do! Give him that song!"

Haiiro looked at her not speaking a word.

...minutes passed...

"So?" devil asked.

"Isn't there supposed to an angel or something to give me advice too?"

Creature chuckled. "But...There's no angel."

"Oh. Sad." Haiiro thought for a while, turned around and made her way back to stage.

_Meanwhile, on the stage..._

Lina looked at Gourry, who was still standing in the middle of scene. 'What was he talking about with her?' she wondered.

Two seats on her left, Zelgadis glanced again at Amelia. They haven't talked since... _that _break.

At this moment Ame turned her head at their eyes met. This time it was too obvious to just turn around and pretend that nothing's happened, so Zel decided to say something.

"Ummm... I wonder where did she go." 'stupid' he scolded himself mentally.

"I have no idea either." Princess responded quietly.

And then was silence.

"You know about that accident in that room I was just, you know, I wanted to, I mean I didn't want to..."  
"You know, when we run into each other, in that room, that what almost have happened, I was..."

They both stopped and blushed, realising that they've started speaking in the same moment.

"Ladies first." Mumbled Zel.

"I.. just wanted to tell you, that... when we were, you know, I wanted to tell you that I..."

"I'M BAAAACK!" Haii run back to the stage, not letting Ame finish. Again... "Sorry for that, I just had to solve one problem."

She approached to Gourry and whispered to him "Take this song." For a moment she hesitated, but finally she haven't picked up that written with red ink. Gourry took the lyrics without even looking at them and went backstage.

"Okay, now it's time to talk with audience! Let's see..." she flew with her black, leather cape flowing behind her to one table. Man with fiery red hair who sat there seemed not to be in the best condition.

Actually, he seemed to have had too much of sake...

Haiiro, not paying attention to his current state, placed her microphone next to his face.

"S'cuse me? Could you introduce yourself?"

"Whaaaa?" redhead rose his head, so his face could be well seen. Everyone noted that guy had canine teeth so long, that it was sticking out from his mouth.

"Oh my" Haii frowned "Are you a vampire? Not again..."

"Naaah..." man tried to concentrate "Me not a vampi...vami...van... waddya ask?"

Everyone sweatdropped. "Okayyy... could you just tell us your name?"

Redhead thought hardly. "Genrou... or Tasuki... I think."

"Good. What more can you tell me?"

Tasuki looked at her for a while. "... I can make things burn!" he said happily and dozed off.

"Oh. So it seems that you could befriend with Lina..."

"What was that supposed to mean?" Lina yelled

"...anyway. Gourry should be ready by now. Let's see him." She flew back to stage.

All lights directed to the entrance to the scene.

"Freaks, I'd like to present Gourry as... No Doubt in song..."Don't speak"!"

Gourry entered the scene in... Blue, dotted dress. His hair was curled and in the middle of forehead he had strange, red spot.

Audience and Slayers mouthdropped, not in the least because of his astonishing beauty.

Suddenly one man in the audience stood up and yelled "Lala! It's you!"

Gorry shivered "VOLUN:"

Haiiro looked at them two and preventing further destruction (and wanting to show off) yelled "SECURITY!"

Tick immediately yelled SPOON and threw himself on poor Volun.

:phew: Haiiro sighed. "Okay, Gourry, are you ready?"

"Umm.. no. Why do I have to wear this dress?"

"Because you're singing a 'girl' song, remember?"

"It's not that. IT MAKES ME LOOK FAT!"

Everyone facefaulted. No comments.

"Nevermind. So what is your dedication?"

"I'd like to dedicate this sing to Lina. Hope you like this song" he waved to her happily.

Redhead's face colour matched her hair, but she waved to him too.

'Awwwwwww..." one of security man said with stars in his eyes.

Then he started to burn.

"AAAAAAAAAAAARGH!" shouting he run to the toilet, while Zachary chuckled.

And music started...

_You and me _

_We used to be together _

_Every day together _

_Always  
_

"It looks for me like him and Lina." Said Filia, stroking Xel.

_I really feel _

_I'm losing my best friend _

_I can't believe _

_This could be the end _

Xel, the cat, of course.

_It looks as though you're letting go _

"Huh?" Lina rose her head with interest. Gourry was looking directly into her eyes. She blushed deeply and turned away.

_And if it's real _

_Well I don't want to know _

"Oh, Lina, what a..." Xellos wanted to give her one of his irritating remarks, but he was quietened with her fireball. He coughed up some smoke and looked at Filia. Surprisingly, she hasn't made any move to take her mace or simply smack him on face.

Actually she smiled a little, looking at him with a corner of her eye.

_Don't speak _

_I know just what you're saying _

_So please stop explaining _

_Don't tell me 'cause it hurts _

"Well, now it's obvious why he's chosen this song." Zelgadis turned to Lina with sarcastic smile on his lips

"He just wanted to tell you not to fireball him every time he doesn't understand everything. Or anything."

Only his chimera speed and good reflex saved him from being burned.

_Don't speak _

_I know what you're thinking _

_I don't need your reasons _

_Don't tell me 'cause it hurts  
_

_Our memories _

_They can be inviting _

_But some are altogether _

_Mighty frightening _

Lina frowned. 'He really means it?...' she thought

_As we die, both you and I _

_With my head in my hands _

_I sit and cry _

"Well, there was a situation like that, after fighing Phibrizzo." Amelia looked at Lina "I'm still wandering what's happened there... So that we've found you in each other's arms" she smirked

_Don't speak _

_I know what you're thinking _

_I don't need your reasons _

_Don't tell me 'cause it hurts _

"Actually, maybe Gourry meant that Lina's explanations are too much for him, and when she's saying something his brain (if there is any) can't take it..." said Xellos, teleporting immediately to avoid being killed by certain redhead.

Lina was too ticked off to use spells. She wanted to choke him with bare hands.

"COME BACK HERE YOU NAMGOMI!" she yelled

"Lina, it's my line!" protested Filia. Lina turned to her slowly, with murder in her eyes. Cat meowed and jumped off Filia's legs to hide behind the armchair.

"Umm..." dragoness twitched "Nevermind."

_It's all ending _

_I gotta stop pretending _

_Who we are _

_You and me _

Lina came back to her seat leaving Xellos alive. For now.

_I can see us dying..._are we?

For a moment Gourry checked his pulse. Coming to conclusion that he's still alive, he shrugged and continued.

Everyone sweatdropped.

_Don't speak _

_I know just what you're saying _

_So please stop explaining _

_Don't tell me 'cause it hurts ..._

"YAYYYYYY:clasp:clasp:" apploused audience.

Gourry bowed and walked off the stage.

"Okay! That was great, Gourry. Any comments from the audience?"

One girl with cell phone rose her hand.

"Yes?"

"I have news from Gourry's fanclub. They say that they're now in the Mexico and they are sorry to have missed Gourry's second performance and that they'll try to make for the rest of show."

"Oh." Haiiro sweatdropped.

'So Gourry DOES have a fanclub!' thought Lina feeling warmth in her chest.

"Any more comments?"

"Hayyy!" yelled Tasuki "Ova 'ere!"

"Yes?" Haii hesitantly approached to him.

"Ya'... you woke me up, an' I wanna know what's goin' on? Who's that pretty lady wh's singin' ova there?"

"Umm.. Tasuki... I'm really sorry to tell you this, but...it was a men."

"Damn it... every time I see a girl that I like, she turns out to be a men... Or one stupid guy takes her away... an' he wants to throw me in water... and I can't swim... And my mother was mean to me... an' when I was thirteen..."

"Umm... okay, thank you very much..." Haii backed off to the stage, just in time to see Gourry coming back.

Swordsmen came to Lina and, to her surprise, he asked

"Did you like that song?"

"I... umm... yes. It was nice." She blushed slightly "Even though you were in skirt... "

He smiled back and sat on his armchair.

"Lina, you're next!" Haiiro brought her back to the reality.

Sorceress stood up and crossed her arms. She wanted to choose the song by herself. This time.

"By the way" Xellos took advantage of the fact, that Lina was gone and Filia seemed to be nicer to him "Gourry, what did you mean with words 'don't tell me cause it hurts'?"

"I dunno..."

"Isn't that the fact, that your head starts to hurt when you have too much information?"

"... Could you repeat? I didn't get all..."

"Or is it the fact that Lina smacks you every time you don't understand something?"

Lina twitched while looking at songs Haii gave her.

"Well... she does hit me very often..."

"So it's because of that? You don't want to be treated like that?"

Lina twitched again.

"Well... actually..."

"And she didn't even say 'sorry', did she?"

"... well.. I haven't heard Lina say something like that..."

It was too much for her.

"ARE YOU IMPLAYING THAT I'M **RUDE, SELFISH** AND **BRUTAL**!"

Xellos and Gourry immediately quietened, but, unfortunately, yelling Lina changed her arms position and now it really looked as if she was pointing at something.

"So you've made your choice." Host smiled and backed away slightly.

"WHAAAAAT?"

Haiiro ran away and hid behind the Tick. "You can go now and dress up. Would you?"

"I'M GONNA KILL YOU!"

"Lina!" suddenly redhead felt someone grabbing her hand. It was... Gourry?

"Remember about prises, Lina." He said pleadingly.

"Oh, yes..." she calmed down. "I'm gonna sing this. Whatever it is it can't be worse than...she looked at the lyrics. "I'M GONNA KILL YOU!"

"Security!" yelled Haiiro seating calmly in her armchair. Two bandit-like guys took kicking Lina backstage.

"Oookay, now that Lina's gone I will..."

She hadn't had any chance to finish what she was saying, because suddenly everyone heard bloodcurdling yell.

"MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWTTTTTHHHHH!"

Filia immediately jumped on her legs. "Kitty?"

Xel sprang from the backstage and run to Filia. Short after him came dozens, hundres, no, thousands of nice... okay, **bloodthirsty** rats.

"IEEEEEEEEE!" yelled dragoness "RATS! RAAAAAAAAAAAATS! AGAIN! HELP ME, HELP ME!" and she jumped in Xellos's arms "Take me out of here! Do it do it!"

Mazoku smirked.

"And you don't care that I'm your worst enemy?"

"Shuddup and TAKE ME OUT OF HERE!" she yelled looking with terrified eyes at the rats that were now running all over the place.

"And you won't say..."

"I CAN EVEN SAY THAT I LOVE YOU BUT TAKE ME OUT OF HERE NOW!"

"Okay." And they've dissapeard.

Amelia, on the other hand, tried not to make any harm to the rodents.

"Ooopss... sorry. Come here, I don't want to harm you, but you can't run on here like tha.. Hey, wait! I won't harm you! Zelgadis!" she turned her head to see him hiding behind his armchair "Zelgadis?"

"Can you take care of them by yourself? I don't really like rats..." Zel said remembering how Rezo's Laboratory used to look like. _Sheeesh..._

Amelia blinked and then chuckled. "Okay!" and she started to drive all animals in one place. Without any success, pitifully... mainly because of...

"DINNER!" Gourry was running to and from with fork in one hand and spoon in other, trying to catch at least one rat.

"Mr Gourry! What are you doing!"

"Trying to catch my dinner. Have you ever tried rat's soup? Delicious..."

Amelia turned green. "But it's unjust to eat such sweet animals!"

"It is?" Gourry shrugged and returned to his chase.

"**SECURITY! SECURITY!" **yelled Haiiro. "Where the hell are they?"

Just then she noticed a piece of paper attached to the curtain. She took it and read.

'LUNCH BREAK'

"HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELL WITH YOU!" she yelled

Due to her high-pitched scream all rats lost conciousness and fell on the ground. Amelia looked at her with nasty eyes.

Haii shrugged. "At least we got rid of them for now. Ignore them, please? Lina should've changed by now..."

And as if she heard that, Lina entered the scene. She was dressed in simple jeans and way to big T-shirt, which made her look even flatter than she really was.

But even Gourry knew that it wouldn't be wise to say her that.

"Okay, freaks, this time you'll se Lina Inverse as... Blue.. more suits Zel..."

Zelgaidis twitched.

"... and she'll sing..."Sorry seems to be the hardest word!"

Whispers started to spread along the room.

"I want to have this over. MUSIC!" yelled Lina.

Tune started and so redhead begun to sing...

_What I got to do _

_To make you love me _

Haii wanted to interrupt, but sorceress already knew what she wanted

"Gourry! I dedicate it to Gourry, okay!"

Sleyers suddenly found the wall on the right very interesting.

Not that Lina'd just said ''What I got to do to make you love me Gourry...''

_What I got to do _

_To make you care _

_What do I do _

_When lightning strikes me _

"ZAAAAAAAAAAAAP"

Stream of electricity struck Lina.

"WHO DID THIS!" she yelled

There was silence for a while, and then she looked on her legs.

"Pika."

Lina twitched.

"SING!" demanded Haiiro

_And I wake to find that _

_You're not there _

"Pika."

"Get away you stupid, overgrown rat!" redhead kicked it

_What I got to do _

_To make you want me _

"If she wants Gourry to notice her she should have a breasts operation..." mumbled Zel just to be smacked by Amelia.

"Men" she rolled her eyes

_What I got to do to be heard _

_What do I say when it's all over _

_Sorry seems to be the hardest word _

"That suits her." Commented Gourry and realising what he'd just done, swordsman jumped behind his armchair.

He stayed there for a while waiting for fireball.

_It's sad, so sad _

_It's a sad, sad situation _

_And it's getting _

_More and more absurd _

Fireball didn't come.

Gourry rose his head surprised and looked at Lina, who was still standing on stage and singing.

_It's sad, so sad _

_Why can't we talk it over _

Was it sorrow he saw in her eyes? (awww..)

_Oh, it seems to me _

_That sorry seems to be the hardest word _

_What do I do to _

_Make you want me _

_What I got to do to be heard _

"I think that she doesn't need anything to be heart, She does good job with the voice she has now..." said Zel "By the way, no offence, by how does Lina manage to sing in such bearable way?"

Haiiro leaned over his armchair. "It happens that she has special module installed in her costume that deforms her voice. Thankfully, she's the only one in here that really needs it..,"

_What do I say when it's all over _

_Sorry seems to be the hardest word _

_It's sad, so sad _

_It's a sad, sad situation _

_And it's getting _

_More and more absurd_

Yeah, I agree with that...

_It's sad, so sad _

_Why can't we talk it over _

"Actually with her short temper, talking anything over can be dangerous to life and health." Mumbled Ame

"You know it from your experience?" asked Zel

"Yeah... it hurts."

_Oh, it seems to me _

_That sorry seems to be the hardest word _

_What do i do to _

_Make you love me _

_What I got to do to be heard _

_What do i do when lightning strikes me _

"_Pika" _

_ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT_

"**I'm gonna kill that fin thing!" **yelled Lina throwing spells at everything in sight. Mainly rats which still laid all over the place. It was very good way to bring them to conciousness...

_What have I got to do _

_What have I got to do _

_When sorry seems to be the hardest word..._

Everyone in the room were running in all possible directions trying to avoid 'the running rats show – reactivation'

Amelia desperately tried to save poor animals from Gourry and Lina who were preparing plates for forthcoming dinner...

"Zelgadis, would you please help me?" Amelia was desperate. Zel carefully came out his hideout (how did he fit under the armchair?)

'Don't think about rats, don't think about rats, about their slimy tails, cunning eyes, yellow teeth, don't think, think about Amelia, Amelia, Amelia...' thought Zel clumsily trying to catch one rat.

"I have an ida!" suddenly yelled Amelia "Haii, is there a fire alarm in this building? We could active it and then..."

Haiiro scrstched her head "Heh he... you know.. it was to expensive..."

"Great" Amelia sweatdropped.

'Think about Amelia, Amelia, Amelia, Amelia' Zelgadis repeated in his mind running after one particulary quick animal. 'Amelia, Amelia, Amelia, Amelia, Amelia...'

"Zel?"

Suddenly he realised that he was standing in the middle of the room, ClLEAN FROM RATS ROOM, and everyone was staring at him.

He also realised that his mouth is open, what ment that he was thinking aloud.

He felt warmth coming to his cheeks. "Sorry. I said I don't like rats."

Lina and Gourry exchanged their looks. "Oookay..."

"Pica(c)hu?"

Lina looked at her legs. That. Creature. Was still standing there. Way too close.

"DIE YOU DEMON FROM HELL!" she started to jump on pokemon.

"Die!" :stomp: "Die!" :stomp: "Dieeeeeeeee!"

"I think that's enough." Gourry laid his hand on Lina's shoulder.

Yellow stain on the floor was all that's left of one of the most annoying pokemons.

"And speaking of creatures from hell..." started Zelgadis "Where are Xellos and Filia?"

* * *

Sorry that this chapter is... like it is. It was rewritten 5 times and i was already planning to delate all and tart from the beginning. But it'd take me at least one month to write it, so... well, here it goes. Vacations/holidays are coming, during them I'll have more time to write : ) i hope.

_"So what would you do it you saw a fight taking place on the stage?" "SPOON!" yelled men I have to say that I didn't understand this part at all. _

**IMPORTANT – For everyone who haven't seen The Tick.** He's the superhero, who is kind of parody of Superman ( The Tick itself is a parody of superheroes.) And in one epicode Tick decides that he needs a shout/cheer – something he would yell before jumping on bandidts.

And it happened that he was eating youghurt when he was pondering this thought.

And he looked at his spoon.

Spoon.

Spoon.

**SPOON!**

This scene is adorable, Regret if you hadn't seen that.

"Damned audience... so, in round two our contestants are supposed to..." "YAY! WOHO:applause:" "... I hate you... Yeah, well I sort of don't understand this little bit either.  
It's like that – ( I know that I suck at explanations : ) ) – audience is backwards. It needs a while to react, or rather reacts in unappropirate moments. And understand Haiiro – everyone would get ticked off in such situation : )

_And to _E.J.A Roberts – Gourry singing a rap song? What do you think about 50cent? I have some plans for him :D

**As usuall r&r!  
**


	7. Other sex song A&Z

Hay!

I still can't believe that it's vacations/holidays. It's just... TOO WONDERFUL!

Eckhm. Today I spent 4 hours on my bike and I have really uncomfortable saddle, so the only place where I can seat peacefully is toilet... ouch.

And in 4 days time I'm going to my grandma. I'll spend over a month with her and. She has NO Internet, so I'm sorry, I won't update. But I'm taking all materials, so I'll be writing anyway. Tee hee...

(... Spending my free time on writing in English, I must be crazy...)

I hope you'll enjoy this chapter : )

* * *

Special (really special, but I won't tell why ; P ) thanx to:

Nicci Rockdad,

Maddy02 ,

rockfreak2003,

Mwafwa,

Rukia-sama,

Kindall ,

Lina Gabriev,

Airi-chan !

**ARIGATOU!

* * *

**

"And speaking of creatures from hell..." started Zelgadis "Where are Xellos and Filia?"

Then there was an awkward silence.

"Oh, forget. I'm not missing Xellos anyway." Shrugged Zel

"AAAAAAaalright!" Haiiro enthusiastically jumped " It's time for next person! And it'll be..."

Everyone held his or her breath.

"Amelia!"

Zelgadis sighed with relief. His humiliation was postponed and well... he can't say that he didn't enjoy Amelia's last performance. Oh, those views...

Amelia on the other hand gulped, approached to Haii and took cards from her hand. After a while she picked one song. "I hope he'll catch." She thought and glanced at Zel.

"Okay, you can now go and dress." Ame nodded "And everybody else..." she faced the audience " Would you mind if I go backstage for a moment?" she grinned sheepishly and quickly run off the stage.

:blink:blink:

"Umm... what was that supposed to be?" asked Lina

"Probably its _that time of month_..." answered swordsman.

_Meanwhile, backstage..._

Haiiro run to an empty room and immediately lifted her hand. Marker-drawn face was still there.

"You wanted to ask me one question" said Haiiro looking at her fist

"Yeah, I did. I thought that Zelgadis was supposed to be next, why you took Amelia?" asked handy man

"Well, what fun it'd be for Zel to sing when Xellos is not around?"

Handy man thought for a while. "True...by the way where are they?"

Haii sweatdropped. "I'm not sure if I want to know...Okay, it's high time to go back to stage! I don't have much tape left in case of any damages... " So she turned around and run back.

When she got back she saw that..

everyone is seating peacefully in his or her seats? Wha...?

Then she looked at security officers and everything was clear. The Tick was tied down and he lay in corner and Zachary was standing with crossed arms looking sinisterly at everyone who dared to move.

"Okay, Zachary, you can now go away, I'll take the guard." Haii approached to him

He looked at her with corner of his eye, shrugged and walked off the stage.

"OOOOOkay, ladies and not-ladies, I'd like to present you Amelia Wil Tesla Sai...something as Phil Collins in song 'Against All Odds'!"

Black haired girl entered the scene with accompany of tempestuous applause.

Applause was recorded on a tape, audience as usual didn't know what's going on.

Anyway, everyone turned their heads to look at her and held their breaths, even Zelgadis, who...

...Sighed in disappointment. But well, he couldn't expect tight costume; it was a 'man' song after all, wasn't it?

Princess was dressed simply in worn-out jeans and brown T-shirt with collar. Simply.

"Who do you want to dedicate this song to?" asked Haii

"Well... I'd like to dedicate this song to... to Zelgadis" she almost whispered blushing furiously. Zel was also red like tomato, what he tried to hide mimicking sudden attack of cough.

Music started and Amelia started to sing...

_How can I just let you walk away,_

_Just let you leave without a trace _

_When I stand here taking every breath with you, ooh _

"Listen, Zel. Maybe it's time to stop looking for your cure?" Asked Lina with evil grin on her face.

"Shuddup."

_You're the only one who really knew me at all _

Amelia sent a starry look to Zel, but at the moment he and Lina were killing themselves with looks. Princess sweatdropped.

_How can you just walk away from me,_

_When all I can do is watch you leave _

_Cos we've shared the laughter and the pain, _

_And even shared the tears _

Zelgadis turned away from Lina and looked at woman at the stage. 'She really means it?' he wondered

_You're the only one who really knew me at all _

_So take a look at me now, _

_'cos there's just an empty space _

_And there's nothing left here to remind me, _

_Just the memory of your face _

This time when Amelia looked dramatically at Zel he was looking at her too.

And they looked at each other with stars in their eyes...

Unsaid emotions flowing in the air...

The moment when everything seems to be right the way it's supposed to be...

And they looked...

And looked...

And looked...

"**HEY, LOVEBIRDS, TODAY!"**

Amelia almost fell down because of that sudden interruption. Again, they both blushed and turned away.

"We're not lovebirds..." mumbled Zel glaring at Lina.

_Take a look at me now, _

_'cos there's just an empty space _

_And you coming back to me is against all odds and that's what I've got to face _

Gourry, on the other hand, seemed to be lost in thoughts...

_I wish I could just make you turn around, _

_Turn around and see me cry _

_There's so much I need to say to you, _

"Oh, Zeeeeeeeel..." mocked Lina, but Zelgadis just turned away trying to ignore her. 'Think about something peaceful... Trees...birds...bees... DAMN!'

_So many reasons why _

_You're the only one who really knew me at all _

_So take a look at me now, _

_'cos there's just an empty space _

_And there's nothing left here to remind me, _

_Just the memory of your face _

Princess glanced at her friends worryingly. Zelgadis was so red that, literally, vapour was coming from his ears, Lina was leaning against armrest of her armchair looking with evil smile on Zel, and Gourry was thinking.

The last thing was itself a bad sign...

_Take a look at me now, _

_'cos there's just an empty space _

_But to wait for you, well that's all I can do and that's what I've got to face _

"I GET IT!" suddenly yelled swordsman, what caused Lina to loose balance and fall down. And because of fact that Gourry, or rather his legs, were on her way... you can say that she landed in rather compromising position.

Again an awkward silence...

"Oh my..." commented Gourry looking at redhead's back of head on his lap "Are you all right?"

Lina jumped in the air yelling something about hentai perverts, picturesquely kicked swordsman in face and quickly sat on yellow armchair.

"What's going on?" asked Amelia. She had her eyes covered by sweatdropping Zelgadis.

"Nothing, just... adult scene." He answered and went back to his seat. Amelia gulped and continued

_Take a good look at me now, _

_'cos I'll still be standing here _

_And you coming back to me is against all odds _

_That's the chance I've got to take, oh, oho _

Zelgadis glanced at furiously blushing Lina.

She glared at him. "Say. Just. A. Word." She said through gritted teeth.

_Just take a look at me now..._

Amelia bowed and stepped off the stage.

_Meanwhile, somewhere in the labyrinth of backstage..._

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN THAT YOU WON'T TELEPORT!"

Xellos took a step back smiling sheepishly.

"Heh heh... It's like... you know..."

Filia took a step towards him holding mace in her hands.

"No, I don't know!"

"It's just that I don't think that it's necessary."

"Oh yeah?" dragoness tried to hit him, but mazoku simply dodged.

"Yes, we were here before, I know the way."

"You said the same 15min ago! Show must have started by now!"

Xel smirked. Ooh, that anger flowing from her... "So?"

"SO! I WANT TO BE THERE, I WANT TO HAVE MY WISH COME TRUE AND IT'S NOT DRAGONS CUSTOM TO BE LATE!" yelled Filia

With one quick move Xel snatched mace from blonde's hands and pushed her to the wall. Their faces were merely inches from each other. Xellos smirked and opened one eye.

"Don't toy with me" he warned her. Filia watched him with horror in her eyes. "And watch what you're sayi.."

Then, they heard piercing scream coming from behind of nearby door. Xel's face immediately changed – he closed his eye and smiled. "Told ya I know the way."

Filia breathed heavily and on shaking leg walked to the door. They were open, unlike in most of fanfics...

But there was something blocking the way. Filia pushed hard and opened the door.

That obstruction happened to be the Tick still tied down, but nevermind.

Everyone looked at unusual couple standing at the newly discovered door. Especially at female – with tossed hair and red face.

Haiiro looked from Filia's face to the mace that Xellos was holding in his hands.

"And what were you two doing?"

Filia ignored that question and on shaking legs she went to her armchair. Seeing that it's occupied she made her way to the red one, previously Lina's.

Xellos lift up one finger and opened his mouth.

"Yeah, yeah, we know, secret, blah, blah, now sit down! Zelgadis, you're next!"

Zel got up and approached to Haiiro. While he was looking at the songs she stepped nearer to him and whispered to his ear "You know? She really doesn't mind the way you look..."

"Uhm.." was his only answer. Haiiro frowned because she expected more violent reaction. Well, she had no choice now...

'Accidentally' she stepped with her heavy shoe on his foot.

"Yeaowch!"

"Oh, I'm so sorry!" and she switched one card from his hand. "So that's your choice!"

"Hey, that's unfair! Guys! Tell her!"

He turned around to see: trembling Filia, puzzled Gourry ("What did I do?"), two empty armchairs (Amelia still wasn't back), trembling Lina and at the end Xellos, who waved happily to him.

'Great' he thought and sighed. "Sometimes I think that you're worse than that fruitcake."

Amelia chose that moment to be back. "Hay! What..." she stopped seeing state of her friends. "... nevermind." And she sat next to Lina.

"'Kay, Zel. Go and change!"

Zelgadis mumbled something under his nose and he went backstage.

_Meanwhile..._

Luna studied, inch by inch, every spot around the table. Then she saw something...

"I've got it! It's his hair!" she yelled holding very long strand of blonde hair. Then she sweatdropped. "Is it man's hair?"

_Back to Slayers_

Haii sat in her armchair 'improving' Zel's lyrics.

Amelia couldn't hold her curiosity down and turned to Lina.

"Miss Lina, can you tell me what's happened in here?"

"Pervert... Hentai... How he dared... " Redhead mumbled not even noticing the princess.

Ame sweatdropped.

"Now everything's okay!" yelled Haiiro holding newer version of lyrics in her hand. "Zel should be ready by now, so girls, boys and creatures..."

All lights directed at scene. In the distance, there could be heard strange noises... like horse hoofs...

"..I'd like to present you Zelgadis G. as J.Lo..."

'Horse' sounds became louder...

"In a song Jen... I mean, 'Zelly from the block!'!"

"YAY! Wooohoooo:clasp:clasp:"

And so Zelgadis entered the scene. He had beige high-heel boots (source of noises), beige skirt, beige top and a cap in the came colour.

Haii looked at him "Well... I know that Jennifer had pants in videoclip of that song, but _accidentally _I couldn't find any..." she ended with smirk.

Zel grumbled under his nose and walked on the stage.

When he stood in the middle, air conditioning that was under his feet suddenly switched on, making his skirt flutter. Zel quickly tried to hold it down, what made him end in famous 'Marylyn Monroe position'.

"Woooooohoooooooo!" yelled audience and there could immediately be heard sounds of photographs.

'will humiliation ever end?' thought Zelgadis

Amelia sweatdropped looking t this scene. 'But I must admit, that he _has_ legs...' she thought

To everybody's (minus Zel) disappointment air conditioning switched off and tune started.

With a sigh and thought 'You're doing this for cure' he started to sing

_Don't be fooled by the rocks... **HEY**! ...that I got _

_I'm still, I'm still Zelly from the block_

_Used to have a little, now I have a lot _

_No matter where I go_

_I know where I came from _

_Don't be fooled by the... **rocks** that I got ... _Damn you all...

_I'm still, I'm still Zelly from the block _

_Used to have a little, now I have a lot _

_No matter where I go _

_I know where I came from _

Zel made a step and his skirt rose a little.

„Whoa, Zel, boxers of briefs?" mocked Xel

:twich:

_From In Living Color to movie scripts _

_To On The Six , to Zel to this headline clips _

_I stay grounded _

_As the amounts roll in _

Lina started to laugh

"You catch? '_Roll'_...Mwhahahahaha!"

:twitched:

_I'm real I thought I told you _

_(I'm real) _

_I'm real even on Oprah ... _whatever it is...

_(I'm real) _

_That's just me _

_Nothing phoney, don't hate on me _

_What you get is what you see, oh _

Amelia looked at Zel with worry. How come everyone enjoy tormenting him that much? Awww...

_Don't be fooled by the... rocks that I got _

_I'm still, I'm still Zelly from the block _

_Used to have a little, now I have a lot _

_No matter where I go _

_I know where I came from _

Lina still couldn't stop laughing and Gourry looking at her started to laugh too.

_Don't be fooled by the... **rocks**_ _that I got _...:grumble:

_I'm still, I'm still Zelly from the block _

_Used to have a little, now I have a lot _

_No matter where I go _

_I know where I came from _

_I'm down to earth like this _

_Rockin' this business_

Lina burst out with hysterical laughter, and so did Gourry.

Zelgadis twitched more and threw fireball at swordsman to quiet at least him.

_I've grown up so much _

_I'm in control and lovin' it_.. yeah...like hell..

_Rule has got me laughing kid _

_I love my life and my public_...like hell...

_Put cure first_...Hey..._and can't forget to stay real To me it's like breathing, yeah_

Xellos looked at Zel and opened one eye.

That made half of audience to yell, droll and faint, but mazoku grew used to this.

That's not important, important is that he had a _plan..._

_Don't be fooled by the... rocks that I got _

_I'm still, I'm still Zelly from the block _

_Used to have a little, now I have a lot _

_No matter where I go _

_I know where I came from _

_Don't be fooled by the... rocks... that I got _

_I'm still, I'm still Zelly from the block _

_Used to have a little, now I have a lot _

_No matter where I go _

_I know where I came from_

Zel groaned and walked off the stage in accompany of Lina's hysterical laughter.

Filia looked at her and sweatdropped. Well, even _she _managed to keep calm... Gourry paid for his good humour with his health...

Amelia was crouching next to the swordsmen and healing his burns.

Suddenly Filia realised that she can't hear laugh of one certain person she'd be sure to hear.

Dragoness turned her head to look at purple armchair just in time to see Xellos teleporting back. He waved to her happily "Hi Filia? Wazzup?"

'Oh... Poor Zel' thought Filia.

"Okay people, anyone want to comment past two performances?"

"Yeah, me! Here!" one men from the audience rose his hand and started to wave. Haii blinked and flew to that guy.

"I could've sworn that I've heard that voice before...Tasuki?"

Indeed, red-haired man grinned showing o everyone his sharp canine teeth. "Yup. I think I've drifted off and I justta woke to see that dude. That was ok., but why he was in skirt?"

Haii twitched. "Oh, I see that you're more sober now. To your information... that's the way it's supposed to be."

"Oh." Tasuki blinked "So he's not you know... I've met a few guys before that wore dresses n' stuff and they wer'... umm.. ya know..."

"No! Zelgadis isn't a gay if that's what you're asking!" Amelia jumped on her armchair and made a justice pose, leaving Gourry with some minor burns.

"'Kay, 'kay.. sheesh... " Tas shook his head and got up. "I'd better look for my sake..." and he walked off.

Haii looked after him and was about to comment, when there could be heard loud, bloodcurdling scream.

"**Where the hell ARE MY CLOTHES!"

* * *

**

So, that's it. Last chapter for a looong time, you know, vacations/holidays, spending moths at grandma's, no Internet, that stuff... So the next update will be probably at the beginning of august... month... hey, you can say that's normal. Tee hee...

Nevermind. So answers for your questions n' suggestions:

Dear**, Lina Gabriev**, dear **Airi,**

'Bout Tasuki – Sorry everyone! I know that I made him look like a total idiot, so now I'd like to emphasise one thing:

**TASUKI WAS DRUNK. HE'S NOT THAT STUPID! REALLY!**

Thank you : )

**Mwafwa**: ...and I was worried that everyone will spot that previous chapter was shorter than two previous, so your comment really cheered me up! (In wicked and crazy way, but it did! ... nevermind... like you said, there's nothing wrong about long chapters : ) )

**Lina Gabriev**: I'm glad that that part about 'Filia stroking Xel' had that effect on you. Tee hee...

" _As justice filled as Amelia is, I doubt she would be trying to help them. She doesn't like ugly things. And while those rats aren't the chimeras she had to fight in the first season, I still think she wouldn't like them. Nor would I expect Zel to be scared of them. „ _– I'm going to explain that. I hope so. Maybe.. in future...  
_"is it because Lina can't sing well? Or can't sing in a deeper voice...or what?" – _maybe it's just me, but I couldn't imagine Lina singing things like high or low tones. She's too... croaky? Sometimes... But probably it's just me : )

**Airi: **.. damn, now I remember I was supposed to replace last chap with corrected version... I'll do it later : ) ...

About Zel and Amelia not talking – I'm not counting game, by the way I meant, you know, _serious talking_, in private... ( Jakby co sorka, że Ty mi tu recenzje po polsku, a ja odpisuje po engliszu. Powiedzmy, ze sie ludze, ze ktos jeszcze to przeczyta, no bo co jak co, ale wyjasnienia pewnych rzeczy w tej pokretnej historii powinny być zrozumiale dla wszystkich : )

And... I think that's all. Thank you for your attention, thank you for your patience and everything. If you have any suggestions e-mail me or put them in reviews, I'm really reading them! There are people who can confirm : )

**BYE AND HAVE A NICE TIME AS FAR AS POSSIBLE FROM YOUR SCHOOLS!**


	8. Other sex song F&X

Hay! As I've promised, despite the fact that I'm at grandma's, I have no computer (not counting this superb-hyper-SLOW laptop...) and actually I'm on vacations/holidays, I'm writing this chapter. To your horror, tee hee...

Nevermind.

* * *

Special, vacation thanks to:

Kindall

Mwafwa

Maddy02

Lina Gabriev

Neo cristal Serenity

Nicci Rockdad

* * *

!IMPORTANTE! VERY. BELIEVE ME!

I ALMOST FORGOT TO GIVE CREDIT TO:

_AIRI_ – IT WAS HER IDEA TO GIVE TO ZEL 'JENNY FROM THE BLOCK'

AND...

TO Maddy02 FOR 'AGAINS ALL ODDS

Oh please excuse me, the mere mortal, for forgetting... heh heh.

So, after this very inspiring beginning... nah. Read.

* * *

"WHERE THE HELL ARE MY CLOTHES!"

"Oh my..." sighed Haii

Filia immediately looked at the certain fruitcake with an accusing look in her eyes, but he just smiled sheepishly and shrugged.

Dragoness rolled her eyes, but said nothing.

"You can't find you clothes?" yelled one random girl from the audience "I'm comin' to help you, Zelly-poo!" she stood up and with an incredibly happy look on her face run backstage.

Then, there could be heard sounds of someone trying to open the door and another one trying to keep them shut.

"Help me! Perverted fangirl!" yelled Zelgadis, while girl pleaded „Oh come on... Zelly, I know that you're shy, oooh... please, let me in and I'll..."

Everyone sweatdropped and Haiiro was just about to call for security, when...

„Leave him alone you injustice hentai fangirl!" yelled Amelia making a pose and with the speed of light she also run backstage.

Group sweatdrop.

„What are you doing here, justice freak?"

"Why you... and who do YOU think you are?"

„That's not your business! And by the way, you're **fat!**"

„FAT! I'm not fat! And you are FLAT!"

„Oh yeah!"

„Yeah!"

„whayyyyyyyyyaaaaaaaa!"

And as everyone could conclude from sounds, girls had just jumped to each other's throats.

"Keep away from him!"

:crush:

"And you, keep your dirty hands away from my dress!"

:sound of clothes being torn:

"How do you like that?"

"Why you!"

:thump:another sound of clothes being torn:

"AAAAAAAh!"

Girls rolled on the scene, breaking a various chair that stood in their way and making the curtain fall down.

"You're not worth him!" yelled the fangirl pushing Amelia to the ground.

In that moment princess gripped handful of girl's long, brown hair and pulled it. Fangirl screamed and in return grabbed Ame's hair.

Then, from the megaphone came music:

_Wanna get rowdy!  
Wanna get a lil' more moody_

Haii sweatdropped "I knew that this DJ is a mistake... Aguilera's 'Dirrrty'... oh my...'

_Get all fired up in a hurry  
Wanna get dirrty  
_

Amelia pulled harder her opponents' hair and somehow managed to stand up. Girl rose on her knees and sent her a dirty look, just when princess was about to kick her in face.

_It's about time that ya came to start the party  
_

With one quick move she dodged and gripped Amelia's other leg knocking her down.

"Go Amelia, GO!" yelled Lina

_Sweat drippin' over my body  
Dance and gettin' drizzled and a lil' naughty  
_

"Ha! You see, gravity isn't the best friend of FAT!" laughed the fangirl.

Amelia smirked. "Oh, so she's the best friend of people flat like you?" and she kicked her in ankle. Girl fell down gripping her leg in pain, and Amelia, taking advantage of her state jumped on her with nails.

_Wanna get dirrty  
It's about time for my arrival..._

"You'd better watch out, I have a fresh manicure!" laughed princess.

Her opponent just smirked. "Oh yeah? And I have unbreakable MaxFactor three layers nail polish! In a fashionable dark blue colour..."

Looking at the scene, all guys started to daydream about Amelia and her opponent, in smaller and tighter costumes, fighting in the middle of a puddle of a mud...

... no comments about men and their fantasies...

(No offence : )

"Amelia! Amelia!" chanted audience and security.

_Wanna get rowdy!  
Wanna get a lil' more moody_

Haiiro cleared her throat, gaining attention from her security officers. "Aren't you supposed to do something with this?"

"Nope." And they continued to yell

_Get all fired up in a hurry  
Wanna get dirrty_

Brown-haired fangirl rose up wanting to end this battle, when suddenly the main door burst open and a muscled and tanned man entered the room.

Music died in the distance...

"Julia! Where is my lunch?" he looked around "And what are you doing in here?"

Fangirl squeaked "Oh, Joshua! You're thinking only 'bout yourself! I'm here to meet me true love!"

"True or not, I'm hungry and you are my wife. We're going home!"

And with these words he grabbed crazy girl's arm and dragged her outside.

Haiiro took a handkerchief and wiped sweat from her forehead.

'Saved by a despotic husband' she thought

Amelia stood up and stuck out her tongue at exiting pair. Then, she lost balance and fell back on the floor.

"Amelia!" yelled Lina and she run to the princess, quickly followed by Gourry and Filia. "Are you okay?" she asked holding her arm

"Yeah... I'm just a bit bruised, that's all..."

"We'll heal you, don't move" said Lina and she started preparing a healing spell with Filia.

"Can I help you somehow?"

Lina tensed and slowly turned back. Gourry, who was crouching close behind sorceress's back, blinked in confuse.

Close.

Way too close.

"Iiiiiiieeeeee! Hentai! Back off!" and so Gourry was thrown to the wall with a fireball.

"Heyy... what did I do?" he thought for a while "This time?"

Haii looked at her watch and gasped. 'This show is moving wayyy too slow!' she thought

"Okay, Filia, you're on stage already, so you can choose a song as well!" Haiiro ignored Filia's weak protests and handled her a card with song's lyrics, as security was clearing the stage.

Lina was sat next to Gourry, so she cringed in her armchair as far away from swordsman as it was possible.

Dragoness looked at the piece of paper she had.

"Oh my... and what am I supposed to choose..." she rose her head in wonder...

... Just to see Xellos, seating comfortably in his armchair and giving autographs to his fans. Of rather FANGIRLS.

She twitched and came back to choosing the song.

Then, to her ears came mazoku's laugh and girl's voice: "Oh Xel, now I know why you're called 'trickster'..."

Filia twitched again, trying NOT to look in certain fruitcake's direction and mumbled "I. Don't. Want. To. Know..."

"So that's your choice! You can go and change!"

"Wha?" dragoness blinked. "No, not again..."

"Too late" Haiiro 'pat-patted' her friendly and pushed backstage. "Okay, so now... I... will... wait, I have a strange feeling that I forgot 'bout something..."

"**IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" **

"**AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGH!"**

"Oh yeah, Zel."

Filia run back breathing heavily, red like a tomato. "That... that... that was so b..." and she fainted.

More from a habit, Xellos quickly teleported to catch her, and then he walked back to his seat. With Filia in his arms, but it begun to be normal to others.

"So what are we going to do with Zel?" asked Amelia

"That's easy. Give him some clothes until we find the thief." Said Lina to Haii

"Yeah, but that's not that easy... You see, I rent these clothes and... well, they appear in the closet when you choose the song and disappear when you take them off after the song. I can't give him clothes like that" she shrugged with sheepish smile on her face.

"Oh. And you're sure you don't have anything?"

"I don't think so... maybe" an evil smirk came on her face "... sorry, I have somethin'..." she run backstage and after a while there could be heard her voice

"Zel, I'm going to throw you a piece of clothing you can use through that small window over the door! Catch!"

"Oh, thanks! I thought that you forgo... ARE YOU KIDDING!"

"wear this or come here naked."

Haiiro came back on the stage, and moments later Zel came back too.

"wooohooooo!" yelled the audience and immediately there could be heard sounds of cameras and photo's being taken

And Zelgadis just stood where he stood with a resignation in his eyes and a Tarzan-like panther loincloth on his hips.

"Oh my, Zel! You look... ummm... maybe you should sit down..." said Ame hiding camera behind her back.

"Yeah..." mumbled Zel and sat on his armchair.

"Okay, so now, when changing room is free, Xellos, could you bring that blonde in your arms to the reality?"

"Aawww, do I have to?" mocked Xel, but in that moment dragoness moved and slowly opened her eyes.

Filia blinked but violet thing before her eyes was still there. She blinked again – nothing.

"Not again..." she moaned "...but I learned something, so I'm not going to jump into your arms... I'm in them by the way, and yell that you're my hero and how wonderful you are. I'm just going to stand up and go and change and pretend that nothing's happened." And so she did.

Xellos blinked in confuse.

"Hey, Xel, is it just me, or has your relationship with Filia... changed?"

mocked Lina

Mazoku just smirked. "And is it just me, or has your distance from your favourite swordsman dramatically increased?"

Lina 'hmpfed' and turned away.

"Guys, please..." said Amelia, visibly fighting an urge to stare at certain person on her right.

In the meantime Haiiro finished changing the lyrics, so she hid her almighty pen, stood up and yelled:

"Okay, so, ladies and monsters! I'd like to present you Filia Ul Copt as Mario Winans in a song 'I don't wanna know'!"

Dragoness entered the scene. She was dressed in a big, white T-shirt, loose jeans and had one gold chain on her neck.

"who'd you like to dedicate this song to?" asked Haii innocently

Filia sighed "To who I should? Xellos." And before any malicious comment came she stated to sing:

_Somebody said they saw you  
__The person you were kissing wasn't me_

"wooo, Xel... not nice..." mocked Zangulus leaning over his armchair.

_And I would never ask you  
__I just kept it to myself  
__I don't want to know  
__If you're playin' me  
__Keep it on the low _

"And who he's not playing?" asked Gourry

Zel turned his head to him "You know, that's a very smart question..."

"Oh. Sorry."

_Cuz my heart can't take it anymore  
__And if you're creepin'  
__Please don't let it show  
__Oooh baby, I don't want to know  
__I think about it when I hold you_

"Hey,who's holding whom usually?" asked Xellos, but it could be seen that he's not as cheerful as usual. 'what? Can't a guy enjoy...Oh my, what am I thinking about?" he thought

_And lookin' in your eyes I can't believe  
__I don't need to know the truth  
__Baby, keep it to yourself _

"You don't have to ask him for that..." mumbled Zelgadis.

_I don't want to know  
__If you're playin' me  
__Keep it on the low  
__Cuz my heart can't take it anymore  
_Yeah...  
_And if you're creepin'  
__Please don't let it show  
__Oooh baby, I don't want to know _

_Did she touch you better than me_

"wohooo, Filia!" yelled Lina

_Did she watch you fall asleep  
__Say you walk away  
__Don't talk to me..._yeah, I can dream...  
_Ooh don't tell me  
__If you're better off that way  
__All that I can say  
__Stay away from me_

"That sound like old Filia_"_ commented Gourry

"what do you mean old?" asked Lina

"well... she's old, isn't she?"

:sweatdrop:

_Even though I know your  
__Whereabouts n'  
__how you movin  
__I know when you in the house  
__When you cruisin'  
__It's been provin'  
__My love you abusin'  
__I cant understand how a girl  
__Got you choosin..._ who's suicidal like that...  
_Undecided  
__I came and provided_

'woooohoooooooo! Go, Filia, Go!" yelled audience

Haiiro shook her head 'Oh my, it's the first time when they actually know what's going on!' she thought

_My undivided  
__You came and denied it  
__Don't even try it  
__I know when you lyin'_

"That's not difficult to know. All the time" commented Zel "And by the way... ummm... Amelia" he looked worryingly at the princess, who stared at her with stars in her eyes "you have spittle on your chin."

_Don't even do that  
__I know why you cryin'_

"Him? Crying?"

_Im not applyin' no pressure  
__Just want to let you know  
__That I don't wan to let you go  
__And I don't want to let you leave..._alone...  
_Cant say I didn't let you breath  
__Gave you extra cheese  
__Put you in the SUV  
__You wanted ice  
__So I made you freeze  
__Made you hot  
__Like the West Indies _

"wooo... Filia!" yelled Lina

_Last time you invest in me  
__Cuz if not then its best you leave  
__holla _

_I don't want to know  
__If you're playin' me  
__Keep it on the low  
__Cuz my heart can't take it anymore  
__And if you're creepin'  
__Please don't let it show  
__Oooh baby, I don't want to know... _

"Yaaaaaaaaaay:applouse:"

Haiiro pushed one button on her dictaphone and everything quietened.

"Ah, there's nothing better than a tape with recorded applause when your audience is too stupid to understand any joke about blondes... Thank you, Filia, you can go and change. Xellos, you're next!"

With his immortal smile, mazoku stood up and approached to Haiiro.

"Here're your songs." She smiled and handled him piece of paper.

Xel looked at it and rose his eyebrow.

"wow, two songs. And what should I choose..."

Meanwhile dragoness came back and took her seat, observing with interest Amelia's attempts not to look at Zel.

She couldn't also not notice, that Zelgadis, although visibly annoyed because of attention he gained in his new outfit, he didn't mind princess's attention at all...

"I choose the second one" decided Xel giving Haii back the 'list' "Mainly because of the fact, that the first one is 'Oops, I did it again...'"

Girl sweatdropped "heh, heh, not that I'm forcing you to sing this song... Hey, that's a good idea... nevermind. Now go!"

When Xellos dissapeard, Haii yelled "Okay, time for another interview! Let's say that I'll choose..." she flew to one table "Can you tell me what's your name?"

"Of course. I'm Mister Elephant."

Haiiro sweatdropped. Indeed, she was talking with the big, grey elephant.

"Okaaay, and what can you tell me about yourself, Mr. ... Elephant?"

"well, I come from Ghana, a country in Africa. Did you watch that Disney's movie 'The Lion King'?"

Haii jumped "YES! That's one of my favourite movies!"

Elephant cleared his throat. "Well, I took a part in that film... And it was actually my idea about that whole 'Hakuna Matata' thing. You must know, that it doesn't mean 'No worries', but in my language it's something like 'world peace, we have to leave together' and I..."

"Oh, thank you, Mr Elephant, but I think that Xellos is ready by now, so... BYE!" and quickly she flew back on the scene. 'Okay, keep calm, I was just talking with am elephant. Nothing special. Elephant...oh my God..."

"So, ladies and animal... um, I mean... nevermind. I'd like to present you Xellos Metallium as Madonna in a song 'Forbidden Love'!"

:silence:

Haiiro grumbled and then, Xel entered the scene,

"YAAAAAAAAAAAYYYY! WOHOOOOOO!"

Mazoku wore a white, knees long dress, brown tights and simple grey high-heel shoes. His hair was wavy and he had a light make-up.

Make-up?

"That girl in the closet said that only real men aren't afraid of having make-up!" announced Xellos proudly.

"Okay, so your dedication?"

"I'd like to dedicate this song to Filia! Listen to it carefully..." he winked to her.

Half of audience fainted.

Then music started and he started to sing...or rather talk:

_Love without guilt love without doubt  
__Love without guilt love without doubt  
__Love without guilt love without doubt  
__Rejection, love without doubt_

"Hmmm... I wonder what he's going to sing about... and why he dedicated this song to Filia..." mocked redhead

Filia rolled her eyes.

_Don't go near the fire don't go in the dark  
__Don't give in to your desire 'cause I'm gonna break your heart_

"Oh... that's not quite inviting..." said Amelia

_Let go let go  
_:singed:  
_I don't don't care if it's not right  
__To have your arms around me  
__I want to feel what it's like  
__Take all of you inside of me_

Filia blushed furiously and mouthdropped.

"Men..." commented Lina looking at swordsman

_In your eyes in your eyes forbidden love  
__In your smile in your smile forbidden love  
__In your kiss in your kiss forbidden love_

"I understand eyes and smile, but kiss? Do you want to tell us something?" Lina turned to dragoness

"Yes. Shut up."

_If I had one wish love would feel like this  
__love would feel like this_

"Aaaaaawwwww... how romantic..." sighed Amelia

Filia just glared at her.

_I know that you're no good for me..._yeah..._you make me sick..._oops, wrong song...  
_That's why I feel I must confess  
__What's wrong is why it feels so right  
__I want to feel your sweet caress  
__In your eyes in your eyes forbidden love  
__In your smile in your smile forbidden love  
__In your kiss in your kiss forbidden love_

Filia looked at mazoku. She knew that it's just a song, but... he looked so... nice singing these words.

Not counting the dress and make-up of course.

_If I had one wish love would feel like this  
__love would feel like this  
__If I only had one wish  
__Love would always feel like this  
__Wishin' on the stars above  
__Forbidden love_

"That's about him and Filia!" suddenly yelled Gourry

"Bravo, ten points for your observation" said Lina rolling her eyes.

"Thanks, I'm trying" he replied giving her his trademark cute smile.

Lina twitched but...'Damn, how can I be angry at him...' she thought

_If I only had one dream  
__This would be more than it seems  
__Forbidden love forbidden love  
__Love without guilt love without doubt  
__Love without guilt love without doubt  
__Rejection Love without doubt  
__Is the greatest aphrodisiac_

Xellos looked at Filia and winked. She blushed and quickly turned away

Security officers 'wooooeed' and mazoku glared at them. They were immediately quiet.

_In your eyes in your eyes forbidden love  
__In your smile in your smile forbidden love  
__In your kiss in your kiss forbidden love  
__If I had one wish love would feel like this  
__love would feel like this  
__Love without guilt love without doubt  
__Love should always feel like this  
__Heaven forgive me never forbid me..._

"Yaaaaaaaaaaaay! Wohooooooo!" yelled the audience

"Thank you, Xel, it was great. Now..."

Lina instantly stood up "That's the end, is it?"

"Ummmm...no. Sorry. I've prepared more thing for you...ummmm" Haii sweatdropped seeing anger rise in Lina's eyes "heh heh... free drinks backstage!" she yelled and everyone quickly run there.

'Deja vu...' mumbled Haiiro looking at empty room. "So I have a while for myself!"

Backstage Lina and Gourry jumped at snacks, in harmony again, Xellos dissapeard again, Filia in wonder sipped a glass of champagne, and Amelia and Zelgadis sat together in the corner, him drinking his beloved coffee and her with hot chocolate.

Zel glanced at the princess and saw that she's not drinking, but staring in the dark liquid.

"Umm... everything okay?" he asked

"Yeah, just... Can you tell me..." Zelgadis rose his eyebrow

"**... I... AM I REALLY FAT?"

* * *

**

So, that's it. Sorry for all the craziness, silliness etc. That's what happens when you're forced to spend more than half of your vacations/holidays with your (too much) caring grandma, grandpa that is sure that I'm a genius, I'm wonderful and caring, blah, blah, blah... and with my 6 yearsold sister, far away from my home, normal computer and for all that time the only person I met that was my age was my cousin! Oh my...

No, I'm NOT desperate...

I want someone to hug me...


	9. From quote? L&G

Wow.

It was really hard for me to end this chappie. First, I had no inspiration (known as 'writer's block') and then I had no time... Time is evil.. thanks God, tomorrow I'm sleeping hour longer. Tee hee ; )

So, be lenient as you read these words. I'm really doing the best I can.

Nice reading!

* * *

**SPECIAL THX TO...**

**Lina Gabriev**

**Vin-the-Mazoku**

**Rukia-sama**

Marie Boli-boli 

**Mew Takako**

Ayako 

**Mwafwa**

**Maddy02**

You are just wonderful! I LOOOOVE YOU!

(don't be afraid. It's just platonic love ;P )

* * *

I'm really sorry if I missed someone or something (like disclaimer that idea for a song wasn't mine. I tend to forget about such things ; P

* * *

"**... I... AM I REALLY FAT?"**

Zelgadis moved away a bit from her tears-filled eyes.

„No.. of course not! You're just fine!"

But that didn't seem to comfort her...

„You're saying this because you want to be nice!" and she started crying again.

Zel sat for a while, unsure what he should do. 'Dammit, think, think... do something, stupid! Dammit, dammit...' raced through his mind. Eventually, he rose his hand and pat-patted her comfortably.

Suddenly, princess jumped on his lap and wrapped her arms around his neck. Now Zelgadis had completely no idea what he should do, so he just sat there stroking her hair.

'Wow, she has such nice hair...Damn, control yourself!' he thought 

„Amelia.. I really meant it, you look... umm... perfectly in my opinion."

Girl rose her head „Really? You do?"

He smiled and nodded.

„Oh, Zel, you're so wonderful!" yelled Amelia hugging him again.

Few tables fort, Gourry turned around and said with his mouth full of food

"Linaph, whis twat Amewia awnd Wel twere?"

"Wha?"

Gourry blinked. "Owh, newewmindw."

**Meanwhile...**

In the black n' white scenery, we can see Luna walking in a long, black leather coat through the street. From her moves it can be said that she knows perfectly where she's going.

She stopped and her eyes landed on an obscure door with a little piece of paper poorly attached to them. She came closer and read it – it said 'Golden coin pub'.

She smirked. 'You can always find what you want if you know where to look for it.' She pushed the door and entered the dive. 'Sin City isn't an ordinary place. You have to know how to find yourself in here...' thought Luna and sat next to the bar. "One whiskey, please."

Barman turned around "It'll be fiftee... Luna? What are you doing in here? Work?"

"No" she answered "Business. Where can I find him?"

"Him?" barman frowned "He's in the magazine. Room 14."

"Thanks." Luna stood up and walked away, ignoring the fact that all men in the room looked after her.

Maybe if she weren't used to it, she would notice that lower part of her back was in jam. Someone, who sat before her next to the bar didn't know how to eat a sandwich without messing everything around.

Nevermind.

For a while she walked through narrow corridors, then she stopped in front of the door with '14' drawn on them. Not bothering to knock, she entered.

The door creaked terribly and immediately she was blinded with white light.

"Who's there?"

"It's me, dammit, do something with that light!"

"Oh, sorry. It's my new assistant. He'd spent so much money on making his teeth perfectly white, so you see... Stop smiling, Mario! Put that magazine away!"

Quite tall and slim man, who sat in the corner of the room, sighed and threw his 'Playboy' away. Man behind the desk shook his head and turned his attention back to Luna.

"Waddya want?"

Girl pushed away some papers that lain on the desk and sat on it.

"I'm looking for someone." She said seriously.

"Oh." Nodded men. "Waddya you know about him? Or her?"

"Him. Nothing, but this" she took little, gild pendant from her neck, opened it and took from it long stand of blonde hair.

The man rose his eyebrow looking at 3meters long hair Luna was holding.

"Umm.. ya sure it's 'him'?"

"Of course! He's my true love!"

Man grimaced. 'Women' he thought.

**Back to Slayers...**

Haiiro was running among the people with belt in her one hand and a fork in another, trying to get everyone to their places. Lina & co were already there, with Amelia still in Zel's lap. He had no heart to tell her to 'get off', and of course he didn't mind it very much...at all...

Everyone understands : )

"OMG, you're such an... nevermind. You wouldn't get it anyway, so on to the next round." Said Haiiro after placing about half of ausdience in their places." This time our contestants will see a word or phrase from the text and they'll have to dedicate this song to someone, who'll... well... match in your opinion to these words."

:crickets chirp:

"Naaah, you'll see. As usual, Lina's first."

Redhead stood up and with noticeable nervousness approached to Haii.

Girl rolled her eyes "Oh, come on. Even if I wanted I can't really do anything to you and then say that you chose someone."

"Yeah, sure." Mumbled Lina and took the piece of paper from her hand. Then she rose her eyebrow.

"What? Only one?"

"Yep. I thought it would be more funny if you had only one song." Haiiro grinned evilly.

Sorceress looked back at her card and sighed heavily. "And with such 'choice' who do you think I'll choose? Gourry."

"Oh, what a surprise, I somehow knew it would be him!" smirked Haii

Lina twitched in reply "I'll get you for that." She snapped back and went backstage.

Haiiro faced the public. "So, Lina went to change, meanwhile I'll maybe question someone... or maybe someone wants to say something?"

"Yes! Me!" someone waved from the back

" 'kay, so what... Tasuki? I thought you were drunk!"

Redhead shook his head "Yup, I was, butta those waiters in here are sooo slow, tha I managed to sober."

Haii sweatdropped. "Oh, I'll try do to something with it. Anything else?"

"Nope. I don't rememba wha I was doin' last 2 hours so nope."

Double sweatdrop. "'kay, Lina should be ready by now, so..."

She flew back to the stage and introduced Lina:

"Madames et Monsieurs et all other things... Meet Lina as Madonna in 'Nothing Fails! She dedicated this song for Gourry!"

All lights directed at swordsman and entering redhead.

Lina's hair was wavy, and she had quite visible make-up – red lipstick, black eyelashes and powder that made her look really pale. She also wore very tight, long white dress.

"She chose him seeing only one word – 'silly'!"

Zelgadis started to laugh. "Hah hah, it's clear that she couldn't have chosen anyone else, hahahah..."

Lina glared at him ready to kill, but as music started she decide to add him to her 'waiting to be killed' list and started to sing:

I'm in love with you, you silly thing... WHAT?I** REFUSE **TO SING IT! 

„But you have to. Remember our deal?"

Lina mumbled something under her nose

Anyone can see... 

„That's true!" suddenly yelled Amelia.

Now, she was on _the list_ too.

_What is it with you, you silly thing_  
_Just take it from me  
__It was not a chance meeting  
__Feel my heart beating  
__You're the one_

"Awww..." said Filia and Xellos simultaneously. Surprised, they looked at each other and smiled softly. Although one of them 'aww'ed because of sympathy. And other just mocked.

Awwww... how sweet... back to the story.

_You could take all this, take it away  
__I'd still have it all  
__Cause I've climbed the tree of life  
__And that is why, no longer scared if I fall  
__When I get lost in space  
__I can return to this place  
__Cause, you're the one_

"Like when that Lord of Night-herd took her?" Gourry asked Ame. 

„NightMARES, Mr Gourry." She replied.

_Nothing fails  
__No more fears  
__Nothing fails  
__You washed away my tears_

Amelia 'aww'ed leaning her head against Zel's chest. Then she realised what she's doing.

"Eeek! Zelgadis! I'm so sorry I forgot, that I'm sitting here, I'll go now!"

_Nothing fails  
__No more fears  
__Nothing fails  
__Nothing fails_

"Nah, no problem. You can stay here'" he replied looking away in hope that she won't notice the blush on her face.

_I'm not religious  
__But I feel so moved  
__Makes me want to pray,  
__Pray you'll always be here_

"Somehow I can't see Lina praying for something. Rather running and throwing fireballs at everything in sight..." commented Filia

_I'm not religious  
__But I feel such love  
__Makes me want to pray_

"Maybe it's her form of prayer?" said Xellos "Like in the past when they were just grunting and yelling..."

"Yeah... I'm sure you can remember it well" said Filia in a mocking tone

Mazoku twitched "You too, I suppose. You look older than me..."

_When I get lost in space  
__I can return to this place  
__Cause, you're the ones_

:BAM:CRASH:

Haiiro shook her head. "How come they're fighting all the time although they like each other?"

Tasaki (who happened to stand nearby, probably brought there in his search for the waiter) looked at her. "They like each otha? I'd ratha say tha they want to kill themselves..."

"Yeah, that's the source of the problem. They can't make up their minds..."

_Nothing fails  
__No more fears  
__Nothing fails  
__You washed away my tears  
__Nothing fails  
__No more fears  
__Nothing fails_

Lina threw microphone angrily away and run backstage.

"Well, thank you... Dammit, she had to throw it there...Growl..." Haii jumped off the stage and crawled away.

Meanwhile, Gourry was sitting quietly in his armchair looking as if he was _thinking_, but it's improbable, so we're going to move on. On his left sat Zelgadis with Amelia, then Filia with her arms crossed, and two seats farther Xellos with black eye.

Ame rose her head and looked at Zelgadis, who was still looking away.

'Damn, I'm going to get a crick in the neck' he thought

"Zel... can I ask you a question?"

"Yes?" 'My neck is kiiiiiiiiilliiiiiiiiiiing meeeeeeeee...'

"Why are you afraid of rats?"

"Rats? Oh yeah..." Zelgadis turned his head to look at the princess. "You see, heh heh.. it's kind of stupid.. When I was a kid, Rezo used to tell me scary stories when I was misbehaving and once, he told me the story 'Braindead' and since then I'm quite dreading rats, monkeys and zombies..."

"Oh. I see..."

_(Few words of explanation : There is a film 'Braindead'. Extremely yucky... Wanna know what's it about? Well, once upon a time there was an island where monkeys lived. One day a ship crashed near it's coast and rats from the ship run on the island and raped all female monkeys. Well, that's enough to give you impression of that film, I can only add that it turned out, that when creatures born from that.. relationship, bites someone, after a few days he turns into a zombie. Enough : )_

Meanwhile Lina came back and now she was sitting next to Gourry.

:poke:poke: "Lina?"

"What?" she asked refusing to look at swordsman.

"Thanks for dedicating this song to me."

"You're welcome."

:poke:poke:"Lina?"

"What?" this time she looked at him, just to see that he's staring at her with eyes full of concern.

"I..."

"'VE GOT IT!" yelled Haiiro jumping from beneath of one table holding microphone in her hand. "So we can continue, Gourry, you're next!"

"'kay!" he said enthusiastically and forgetting about his serious talk with Lina, he went on stage.

"You have these words, read them."

She gave him a piece of paper and for a while there was silence.

"These words make me think of... Lina." He said.

"Okay, now go and change!"

Zelgadis smirked and looked at sorceress.

"I bet it was 'I love you' or something like this." He mocked.

"And who's saying that?" she replied looking at princess in his lap.

Suddenly the door burst wide open and a crowd of blondes filled the room.

_Hundreds, thousands of blondes..._

And so the average IQ in the room dropped from 1,2 to – 400012...

(And who's writing that.. blonde, actually dark blonde... sigh.)

"Oh my God, oh my God, are we late?"

"Late? For what?" asked Haii terrified with their sudden appearance

"OF COURSE OUR DEAR GOURRY'S PERFORMANCE!" they yelled in unison " My head..." sighed Haii 

"Yes! We're just in time to see it! Group yay!" one of them yelled

"YAAAAAAAAYYY!"

"Actually, we're starting third round, so you are late... what took you so long?"

"Well, we had problems in Norway, because there were no planes to Mexico, so we flew to Mozambique. Sounds similar, so we thought that it's good too."

"We.Are.Not.In.Mexico. Nevermind, take your seats, Gourry should be ready by now..."

Lina looked at large group of blondes. 'So Gourry does have a fanclub!' she thought with a satisfaction. But her mood suddenly dropped... hmm.. may it me... jealousness?

"SO. People and blondes, I'd like to present you Gourry as Rob Thomas in a song 'Lonely no more'!"

And so Gourry entered the stage. He was wearing a dark green T-shirt and light, torn jeans.

"YAAAAAAAAAAAYYYY! WOOOOHhooooo!" yelled his fanclub throwing flowers at him, while the rest of the audience was picking their noses. Yuck.

Lina again found herself staring at swordsman, while he picked on rose and smelled it.

"YAAAAAAAYYY!" "I love you!" "Marry me!" "Sleep with us!"

Redhead looked at blonde mob with irritation. "Grrrrr...What they're so excited about?"

"Gourry decided to dedicate this song to Lina when he saw the following words" Haii took a breath (getting ready to run away) "_ I DON'T WANNA HAVE TO PAY FOR THIS!"_

"WHAAAAAAAt?" yelled Lina 

"I hear it from you every time we are in an inn, so you know... he." Gourry scratched his head "I.. umm..."

Music started, so Gourry had no choice but to start singing. That probably saved him from saying something more stupid ( and landing in a hospital.. or graveyard, knowing Lina..)

Now it seems to me 

_That you know just what to say  
__Words are only words  
__Can you show me something else _

"Hmm. That sounds like an invitation for her..." mumbled Xel looking from the corner of his eye at Lina, who was still fuming.

_Can you swear to me that you'll always be this way  
__Show me how you feel  
__More than ever baby  
__I don't wanna be lonely any more _

"You don't have to!" yelled one crazy fangirl.

"Security!"

_I don't wanna have to pay for this  
__I don't want to know the lover at my door  
__Is just another heartache on my list _

Zangulus and one bully from security took the kicking fangirl out, but other's started jumping on Gourry too. Haiiro looked with panic around the room.

"Hey, you!" she yelled to Zachary "Where is the Tick? Only he can take care of all this mess!"

"And why should I know?"

"Nevermind. I'll go look for him."

_I don't wanna you to be angry no more _

"Heh, no one wants." Smirked Zel. The glare that redhead sent him almost hurt him. 

_I know I could never stand for this  
__So when you tell me that you love me know for sure  
__I don't want to be lonely anymore _

"Tick! Tiiick! I'm paying you for being hereeeeeeEEEEE!" Haii tripped up over somethin big on the floor.

"What the..." she turned around just to see the Tick. Tied down and lying on the floor. "What are you doing here like this!"

"It's a long story, but I'd like to express my great gratitude that you freed me. Let me hug you!"

"NO!" yelled Haiiro backing away "You.. umm... I need you at the stage. There are some crazy fangirls attacking Gourry"

"AAAAAllright, here I come!"

_Now it's hard for me with my heart still on the mend  
__Open up to me, like you do your girlfriends  
__And you sing to me and it's harmony _

"Lina singing? I'd rather call it 'chaos'..." said Filia

"It creates such delightful sorrow!" replied Xellos.

Filia just chuckled and shook her head.

_Girl, what you do to me is everything  
__Make me say anything; just to get you back again  
__Why can we just try _

In that moment Gourry looked at Lina. She just couldn't stop looking in his deep, blue eyes. Suddenly the world slowed and all she could hear was quiet, peaceful music.  
She wanted this moment to last forever, but suddenly something dropped on her head. She rose her hand to touch it and then looked at her head. It was a white substance. 

White substance falling from the air... Lina cursed in her head and looked up just to see...

Tasuki with a yoghurt in one hand and spoon in another. He did his best not to laugh in her face "You should have seen your face"

"Why you little.." she glared at him preparing fireball

"Lina!" yelled Amelia holding her hand. " Not now!"

_I don't wanna be lonely no more  
__I don't wanna have to pay for this  
__I don't want to know the lover at my door  
__Is just another heartache on my list _

_I don't wanna be angry no more _

"We can only dream of it..." mumbled Zel. Amelia giggled hearing this.

_You know I could never stand for this  
__So when you tell me that you love me know for sure  
__I don't want to be lonely anymore _

_What if I was good to you, what if you were good to me_  
_What if I could hold you till I feel you move inside of me _

"Umm... no comments." Said Amelia looking worryingly at Lina, but she was unusually calm.

You can't say that about Gourry's fanclub who was actually trying to jump at their idol and tear his clothes off.

_What if it was paradise, what if we were _symph..simp...samples...no, not.. umm  
_What if I gave all my life to find some way to stand beside you _

"I think that that's exactly what he's doing right now." Said Filia with stars in her eyes. "Oh, I love romances."

Xellos smirked evilly. 'This can be usefull in the future..' he noted

_I don't wanna be lonely no more_  
_I don't wanna have to pay for this  
__I don't want to know the lover at my door  
__Is just another heartache on my list _

In this exact moment fangirls managed to get through the barrier and jumped at swordsman. Lina immediately stood up and started throwing fireballs at crazy fanclub.

_I don't wanna be angry no more _

:Boooom: "AAAAAargh!"

_You know I could never stand for this _

:Crash:"My eyelashes! Nooo!"

_So when you tell me that you love me know for sure _

:Splat: "Oh no! My lipgloss broke!"

_I don't want to be lonely anymore _

The Tick seeing this whole situation decided, that there is no choice, he has to use his strength. He run and jumped in the middle of the mob yelling "SPOOOOOON!"

_I don't wanna be lonely anymore..._

:Smack: - and that's the sound of Ticks face hitting the ground.

There was silence for a while as everyone looked at superhero. Then, someone yelled.

"Who ordered sake?"

"MEEEE!" yelled Tasuki jumping from below the table and running in voice's direction. The mob moved away and redhead saw the waiter. "Thanks, wha took ya soo... Oh men." He slapped his forehead. "You, Haiiro or whatever, what made you hire a SNAIL as a waiter!"

She just laughed sheepishly. "Lack of money?"

Tas facefaulted. "Kay, now I'll go somewha' and drink in peace. Have fun, kids."

"Okay, so... Gourry, you can now go and... Gourry?"

Haii looked around, but swordsman's characteristic figure was nowhere to be seen. "Anyone seen Gourry?"

Everyone stood up (even Amelia and Zelgadis, although without any enthusiasm) and started looking for him.

Lina looked under his armchair worryingly. 'He's not the brightest one, so he can be anywhere' she thought 'but.. maybe he decided not to wait for us and went change?' she wondered heading in changing room's direction.

Just after she passed the corner she saw something... terrible.

Gourry. Standing against the wall.

With. A. Girl.

Their. Faces.

Too close. Way too close.

Lina felt anger and sorrow at the same time. Her legs were numb and probably for the first time in her whole life she couldn't find a word to say anything.

**Meanwhile...**

Luna suddenly stood up.

"Hey, girl, what's wrong?" asked the guy.

"I just felt something... there is something very wrong happening with my true love!"

"Cheer up, gimme a while and I'll finish" he replied looking through magnifying glass at the hair strain she gave him earlier.

Magnifying glass was connected with a big kettle full of something like water, but it was giving strange red aura.

"Hurry up." She said simply.

The man groaned and after something like 2 minutes he yelled "I've got it! Come and see your guy"

Luna quickly approached to the kettle and looked into it. The liquid started to move in strange way, boil and after few seconds there could be seen a face of a handsome man with blue eyes and blonde hair.

"Mrrau" said Luna "Do you know anything else about him?"

"Yeah, his name is.. Gourry Gabriev."

* * *

Well, that's all for now.

Damn, I'm so hungry. I hope you enjoyed, at least a little bit this chapter.

And it's so cold in here.

R&R. ! Weeeeheee...

And sorry. I suppose that the last two words of this chapter were painfully predictable : ) damn... I suck...


	10. Form quote? Z&A

Yaaay, again, after a loooong break...

I can only beg you to forgive me... nah.

I knew you were ruthless. Nevermind.

* * *

Special thanks to

?clueless? – thanks, but I think that this rather out-of-date about me updating and studying...and don't worry, I plan to revise TM somewhere in the future

Dreaming One

Rukia-sama

Mwafwa

Maddy02

Airi-chan – I love your ideas! Unfortunately, I've already had something planned for now... so it seems that this story is going to have few chapters more than I planned ; P just have to include those songs you've written about

And here we go!

* * *

Lina blinked. Nothing changed, so she blinked again. Nope, her vision was perfect.

That meant that there was something terribly wrong with what she saw.

She felt strange warm coming to her cheeks and her hands begun to shake.

The girl that stood in front of Gourry turned around and saw Lina.

"Would you mind? We want some privacy!"

"PRIVACY?" in less than a second Lina was standing next to the fangirl, holding her up by collar "GET YOUR BLONDE AS...HEAD OUTTA HERE OR I'LL BURN YOU SO THAT THERE WON'T BE ANYTHING LEFT!"

Blonde's head wasn't blown off, but her petite non-existing brain was big enough to understand, that she has to run. Fast.

When she was gone redhead turned to Gourry, who was still leaning against the wall.

"And you..."

"Lina? Let me explain..."

"..you..."

"I was just passing by when she jumped on me and..."

"..you..."

"I..I didn't mean to, it was so sudden..."

"...you better watch out in the future!"

Swordsman waited for few seconds for hit, blow, fire, explosion or something, but it didn't came. Lina was standing quietly as if nothing happened.

"You're not mad at me?"

She shrugged "For what? I knew that that freak jumped on you and that you're innocent. I trust you." She turned on her heel and walked on stage.

Gourry scratched his head in confusion. "I wonder what innocent means..."

**Meanwhile on the stage...**

"Okay, guys, take out these bodies before anyone comes here and accuses us from mass murder...meanwhile, shall we continue?"

"But Miss Lina and Mister Gourry aren't here yet..." said Amelia

"Oh for God's sake... we can start without them. Zel, you're next!"

"Crap." He muttered under his breath and slowly stood up.

"Come on, show some enthusiasm!" Haiiro rolled her eyes

After taking his card Zelgadis rose his eyebrow.

"I bet that the answer 'Amelia' doesn't surprise you at all?" he said. Haii just grinned in response and pointed at the changing room direction.

When Zelgadis walked off, Haiiro faced the audience

"So, it time to talk with some of you.. maybe...YOU!" she flew to one table "Can you introduce yourself?" she asked a green haired man.

"Whaaa...? Umm... yeah, My name is Gareas... but friends call me Galu"

Haiiro blinked "See... Aren't you related to Tasuki?"

"Who?"

"I bet that if your hair was red instead of green you'd look almost identically."

"Great..." he mumbled and passed out. A woman with blonde hair who sat beside Galu looked at him worryingly.

"Oh my... I wonder how he's going to wake up for work tomorrow..." she sighed.

"Work? Interesting, interesting, would you please tell me more? What's your name?"

Blonde rose her head and looked at Haiiro with her bright blue eyes "Umm, yeah, sure. My name is Leena, and I work with him" she poked Gareas "In GOA. It's an agency that protects this planet from the creatures called Victims, and Galu is one of the main pilots, who fight with them."

Haii tilted her head. "We're being attacked?"

"You didn't know?"

Suddenly a few man, dressed in a black suit and wearing sunglasses, jumped on the table, covering Galu and Leena completely.

From the ceiling fell one more man and gracefully landed in front of Haiiro.

"FBI, these two are wanted for deceiving numerous people, thank you for helping in arresting, well send you a medal in few days." He spat out quickly.

"But..." Haii glanced over his shoulder too see other guards slowly lifting themselves from the ground. But she still couldn't see her guests.

Then she heard the voice of the green haired man coming from below of the pile of agents.

"Aaahhh, I can't feel my brain... No, wait, it's right beside my hand..."

Everyone sweatdropped.

"At least he woke up... Nevermind. Zelgadis should be ready by now."

Haii flew back to the stage. She looked quickly at her right making sure, that everyone was on their places. Then, she announced

"Not-gentlemens, and not-ladies, so everyone, I'd like to present you Zelgadis Greyw... naah, as Lemar in the song "If there's any Justice"!"

"YAHOOOOO! YAAAYYYYY!" yelled the audience.

Zelgadis entered the scene wearing a simple white T-shirt and jeans.

"This song is dedicated to Amelia, and he decided so seeing the word..."

"Love" said Lina

"Naah. I bet it was something to do with 'sex'" said Xellos

"Kiss" stated Filia.

Mazoku looked at her surprised.

"Cucumber" said Gourry.

Lina sighed 'Ignore it.'

"JUSTICE" yelled Hairro. Lina, Xel and Filia sighed with disappointment.

Music started and Zelgadis started to sing

_Ohhh, _

_Ye-ah-ah,_

Stupid.

_Yeah, _

_I would be your man, _

_You would be my girl, _

HEY! It wasn't supposed to be in these lyrics!

Hairro shrugged.

_Oh yeah, _

_I believe, _

_I do, _

_If there's any justice in the world, _

_I would be your man, _

_You would be my girl, _

Zel blushed slightly

_If I'd found you first you know its true, _

_You wouldn't be alone, _

_I would be with you,_

"Awww, how sweet" said Filia.

_When you decide, don't let me down, _

_Coz there's nothing to be certain in my life, _

_And you've seen a thousand times _

_There's not much justice in the world _

"It's not very optimistic song...' commented Lina.

_If there's any justice in your heart, _

"This condition is fulfilled, now wait for the rest of the text..." smirked Xellos.

_You love pity it changed, _

_Ease it into heart, _

_Oh no, _

_Why don't you remember how it feels, _

_Not to give a damn, _

_For anyone but me_

Lina almost choked. "Ummm... I think that she remembers it too well..."

"Lina! Don't be rude!" yelled Amelia. Redhead curled in the corner of her armchair surprised by her outburst.

_I can't believe you'd be deceived, _

Changing memories from truth to fantasy 

"Hmmm... I've always thought that people usually try to change their _fantasies_ into truth..." wonder_ed _Xellos. Filia smacked him with his mace.

"I can tolerate a lot, but no dirty thoughts!" she hissed.

"Haiii..." answered mazoku from the floor. 'If she'd moved a little I'd have a great view on her legs...' he thought.

_Where there's nothing left but tears, _

_And there's not much justice in the world _

_Just because I'm wrapped around your finger, _

"That's true." Whispered Lina. Then, she felt that Gourry is poking her arm again. "What?"

"Amelia's red, you know?"

_Don't fool yourself with dreams that might appear, _

_If in time you'll stop and trust your feelings, _

_The truth is out there somewhere _

_It's blowing in the wind_

_If there's any justice in the world, _

_I would be your man, _

_You would be my girl, _

"Well, considering the fact, that there surely IS some justice in the world, that means..." said Xellos, but soon he was quietened with certain princesses 'Death Glare'.

'My, my... she surely spends too much time around Lina...' he thought

_Oh yeah, _

_If I'd found you first you know its true, _

_I wouldn't be alone, _

_I would be with you, _

Probably Zelgadis just identified with this song too much, but in this moment he reached his hand in the distance. Half of the girls in the room fainted, and even some guys felt that their legs were numb.

_When you decide, don't let me down, _

_Coz there's nothing to be certain in my life, _

Zelgadis turned to Amelia. Again, they found themselves unable to break the eye contact, pink clouds flying around them.

_And you've seen a thousand times _

_There's not much justice in the world _

_If there's any justice in the world, _

_You're gonna be my baby, _

_You're gonna be my baby, _

_You're gonna be my baby!_

Zel and Amelia forgot about everything, lost in each other's eyes. Zelgadis smiled softly after finishing the song and repeated voicelessly ' you're gonna be my baby?'

The princess blushed shyly and nodded. He smiled even brighter. Actually, he felt so happy, that he almost ignored that disturbing sound of something heavy banging against his head...

Hairro scratched her head. Even hitting Zelgadis with the armchair didn't bring him back to the reality. For a while she contemplated various options, when an idea stuck her mind.

On Haii's face crept one of the most sadistic smiles the world has ever seen.

With one quick motion she pulled Zel's trousers down.

That actually worked. Zelgadis quickly grabbed them from the floor, and he run backstage trying at the same time to fasten his belt.

For good five minutes the room was filled with yells, whistles, and a typical chaos.

Even Amelia couldn't help but say "He really has nice as..." the rest o the sentence was drowned out by one man running randomly along the room yelling something about his girlfriend being a man.

In the corner of the room stood Zachary turned to Zangulus.

"Briefs. You owe me ten bucks."

* * *

"Alright. Now, when the mess is cleaned AGAIN... eckhm, it's time for Amelia!"

Ame took her card and read it.

"Well... ummmm... is it really the only option?"

"Yup." Grinned Haii.

Amelia blushed. "Zel." And she quickly walked off.

Lina whisteled. "Anyone noticed, that Amelia stopped calling Zelgadis 'Mr'?"

"It seems that something's changed between those two..." smirked Xel from the floor.

"Okay, Zel, tell us everything. With details." Demanded Lina.

"Shuddup." Was Zel's only answer.

"You're not fun. I have better idea – let's bet what was the phrase that Amelia had!" redhead stood up. " I say... 'He's hot'!"

"'Sex' said mazoku. Everyone sweatdropped.

"And he only about one thing... I'll say... something about his 'Soft lips'!"

Zelgadis was just getting redder and redder...

"'Briefs'" said Gourry and everyone burst into laughter.

Zelgadis just covered his face with his hand and prayed for something heavy to fall on his head... anything...'

'Splash'

Zel rose his head to see Tasuki with yoghurt and a spoon. Tas could hardly control himself not to fell down. At least he would make Zel's wish come true. And die with a smile on his face.

"Okay, anyone, everyone, all, no one, let me introduce Amelia Wil Tesla Sailoon, or something as Christina Aguilera in 'What a girl wants'!"

"YAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYY!"

"Listen carefully, Zel" Lina nudged Zel. He was too tired to say anything. Besides, sight of Amelia in tight, light jeans and light pink tank top was the only thing that occupied his mind at the moment.

"She dedicated this song to Zelgadis seeing one phrase: 'Like a rock'!"

It was very unpleasant back to the reality. But the truth is, that Zelgadis would kill everyone BUT HER in such situation...

Ame cleared her throat shyly and started to sing

_What a girl wants, what a girl needs _

_Whatever makes me happy and sets you free... _

_What a girl wants, what a girl needs_

_Whatever keeps me in your arms _

_I wanna thank you for giving me time to breathe _

"And it's another proof, that Zel is a regular expert on woman" commented Xellos.

_Like a rock, you waited so patiently, while I got it together _

_While I figured it out I only looked, but I never touched _

'well, that's true...' thought Zel still looking at Amelia.

_'Cause in my heart was a picture of us _

_Holding hands, making plans _

_And lucky for me, you understand_

Amelia glanced quickly at her beloved, afraid that with longer eye contact they'll freeze again. 'I should try and get some _privacy_ with him...' she thought

What a girl wants, what a girl needs 

_Whatever makes me happy and sets you free... _

_And I'm thanking you for knowing exactly _

_What a girl wants, what a girl needs _

_Whatever keeps me in your arms _

_And I'm thanking you for being there for me _

"Xellos?"

Mazoku lifted his head and looked at the dragoness. "Yup?"

"Aren't you going to stand up or something?"

"Nah. I'm comfortable in here." He couldn't help but glance under her skirt again. Unfortunately, Filia noticed.

"YOU OLD PERVERT!" she yelled smashing him with her mace and making a big hole in the wall.

"Everything, honey, but not old..." panted mazoku sticking his head from the hole

_A weaker man might have walked away _

_But you had faith strong enough to move _

_Over and understand while I got it together _

_While I figured it out _

'I should be the one to sing this part' realised Zel. Immediately, he felt guilty. For being cold all these years. 'I should change something about it...'

_They say, "If you love something, let it go _

_If it comes back, it's yours; that's how you know." _

_It's for keeps, yeah, it's for sure _

_And you're ready and willing to give me more _

"Lina, what Zel wills to give to Amelia? Isn't she richer than him?"

"Yes, she is. It's about their...umm..."

"Feelings?"

"Yes, Gourry feelings."

"Oh" he propped his chin. 'Feelings...'

_What a girl wants, what a girl needs _

_Whatever makes me happy and sets you free _

_And I'm thanking you for knowing exactly _

_What a girl wants, what a girl needs _

_Whatever keeps me in your arms _

_And I'm thanking you for being there for me _

_Somebody sensitive and tough _

Xellos was sitting in a hole with a piece of paper and a pencil in his hands.

"Sensitive – check. Tough – check."

_Somebody there when the going gets rough _

"Rough – check"

_Every night he'll be giving his love _

"Capable of making love very often – check"

_To just one girl, one girl, one _

"Faithful – check"

_Somebody cool but real tender too _

"Check"

_Somebody, baby, just like you _

_Can keep me hanging around with _

_The one who always knew _

_And I'm thanking you _

_For being there for me  
_

_What a girl wants, what a girl needs _

_Whatever makes me happy and sets you free... _

_And I'm thanking you for knowing exactly _

_What a girl wants, what a girl needs _

_Whatever keeps me in your arms _

_And I'm thanking you for being there for me _

_And I'm thanking you for knowing exactly... _

_And I'm thanking you for being there for me..._

Amelia bowed and walked off the stage in accompany of loud applause.

Xellos teleported next to Zelgadis and handled him his list.

"What the hell is that?"

"Just something I did for you" answered Xellos nonchalantly. "Just was curious if you're her type." He winked

"Whaaa.. You're sick. It's stupid."

"Then, why are you checking the result?" mocked mazoku.

Zelgadis groaned and crumpled the paper. "I'm not interested in your researches" he said and quickly gagged Xel with the roll. "Now do the favour to the world and don't take it out!" and with these words he walked away.

Two meters by, Gourry turned to Lina.

"Umm, Lina, about those feelings..."

Redhead looked at the swordsman surprised. "Yes?"

"But promise, that you won't burn me or something, okay?" he asked, somehow nervously.

She nodded. 'May it be?' she thought.

Meanwhile, Gourry moved closer and slowly reached his arm as if he wanted to put it on Lina's arm. The further one. So, as if he wanted to... hug her!

Lina gulped.

"I just wanted to tell you something very important. I..."

He looked straight into her eyes. "I..."

"GOURRY MY LOVE!"

* * *

Sorry, but it seems that I'm unable to do anything more today. Actually, it's 00.42, so I started to write it yesterday, I can hardly see the keyboard, and well.. I know it's rather malicious place to finish, but I'm really sleeping...

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz...

Umm, where was I... oh yes, and I really feel bad for not uploading in such long time. Forgive meeeee... I'm doing my best. I love you...no, I don't... I'm just too sleepy..

And by the way, this text about 'my brain lying next to me' is from Mucha Lucha. I loved this text. Flea stinks. And the show is poorly animated. But some quotes are great.

See ya soon, I hope. Bye. Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz...


	11. Form quote? F&X

Oh my.. Two words: School. SuXXX! Xx ...

I'm sorry for such.. Updates, but well, I have no time, I have ban on computer, my life is ruined and well... writer's block? I'm actually off Slayers topic lately, so it's quite hard just to come back so suddenly and continue

But I'm doing my best and I hope that you'll like this chapter.

Thank you for all suggestions, I really like them and I hope to include some of them in the future, because now I have to follow this non-existing story line. I always read the lyrics of suggested songs and even if I won't include them here, they always give me some ideas. And I need them very much lately : ( ...

* * *

**Special thanks to all who reviewed, that means:**

**I.N.**

**Marie-Boli **

**Rukia-sama**

**anime lvr **

**Niele-Mzk **

**Maddy02**

* * *

"GOURRY MY LOVE!"

Haiiro slapped her forehead. 'Please, let me have 5min of peace... '

Everyone's heads turned to a woman in the entrance. She had shoulder length purple hair like Xellos and black coat, from beneath of which could be seen waitress's uniform.

Lina's sighed heavily 'another crazy fan... and whey they all look like Pamela Anderson?'

"Okay. Listen, whoever you are – Gourry is NOT INTRESTED!"

"Really" woman smirked and started walking in their direction "And who you are to order meeee...eeeeee? Lina?"

As the woman came closer, Lina finally realised her terrible mistake.

"Oh fu... LUNA! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"

And forgetting about everything she run away as if she saw Xel in lingerie.

When she stopped she was quite deep in the maze of backstage. She leaned against the wall and closed her eyes, breathing heavily.

"How? When? Why? What did she want from Gourry? What she wants from me? It has to be a bad dream, there's no way she can be back after all these years..."

"Lina?"

"Yes?"

"Why are we hiding?"

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaH!" sorceress jumped in fear as she realised that she's not alone. "GOURRY?"

"Yup."

"Why did you..." but she didn't have a chance to finish, because she was interrupted by a loud 'clack, clack' of someone in high-heels coming in their direction.

"Ohhh Linaaaa! Sister! Gourry, honey! Where are you? Why are you hiiiidiing?"

Lina swore and dragged the swordsman to the nearest door and shut them.

* * *

Meanwhile, on the stage, Haiiro was walking in circles. Then, she stopped and groaned 

"Where the hell are they?"

"That's why I suggested following them. Judging by Lina's reaction, it was her sister and well... I don't know _how _she wants to greet her little sister." Said Zelgadis crossing his arms

"But I told security to go after them! ... Nevermind. Show must go on, Filia, come!"

"Filia?"

Dragoness's armchair was empty. And so was Xel's.

Haiiro groaned more "Just great. WHERE DID EVERYONE GO!"

Amelia rose her hand. "But.. me and Zel are here..."

"AND DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT MOVING FROM YOUR PLACES! I'm..."

Haiiro jumped behind the curtain and after a second jumped back, dressed in khaki long pants, black tank top and with black band on her head

"going after them. " Then, she took a dagger from her shoe and went backstage.

From the loudspeakers came relaxing sounds of sea, screams of seagulls, yells of overprotective mothers (don't go into the water!There was a dog in it!) etc.

Zelgadis and Amelia looked at each other with awkward silence between them.

"So... ummm... I wonder where did everyone go." Started Ame shyly

"Amelia." Princess looked at Zel's face surprised by the seriousness in his voice "We... we need to talk."

Amelia's heart started to beat faster. "Yes?"

"I..well...umm..." Zelgadis looked down thinking how to say what he meant. And what he exactly meant? What he wanted to say? I like you? I care for you? I lov..."

He looked at his clenched fists. 'and then what? How she'll react? I'm almost positive that she feels the same way, but...' then, looking at his hand he realised something 'I'm chimera. She is a princess. It doesn't matter how I feel, she deserves better. Not a stone freak.'

"Zelgadis?" Amelia spoke softly seeing his hands trembling "Everything okay?"

"Yes" he muttered. 'What was I thinking?' "Just... Nevermind. It doesn't matter now."

Amelia blinked. 'And it was so good...' "but..." she started

"It's not important" said Zel faking smile "Would you excuse me?" and he walked away.

"But Miss Haiiro told us to sta... oh great. Now I'm alone." She pouted crossing arms. "Where is everybody..."

* * *

Meanwhile, somewhere in Paris...

"Can you remind me, why I'm HERE, with YOU?"

"Tsk, tsk, my dear Filia, why are you so nervous?" mazoku wiggled his finger

"Because I'm NOT where I'm supposed to be, and with someone I'm NOT supposed to bee seen with!" yelled blonde catching the attention of everyone around. She sweatdropped and with resignation leaned against the table.

"Well, it was our turn coming now, so I decided that it's the best moment to take you out as I've promised you."

Filia blinked. "Promised? That's a good one... when?"

"As far as I remember when I was singing 'Too sexy' and you decided to make that little prank...maybe some wine?" he smiled

"Yes, please... BUT I WASN'T SERIOUS BACK THEN! AND YOU KNOW IT PERFECTLY!" she yelled handing him her glass

"Yare, yare.. You're catchin' attention again, you know?" he winked at her.

Filia sighed heavily.

* * *

And back to the show, in the middle of maze...I mean, backstage... 

Lina kept her hand over Gourry's mouth to keep him quiet as sound of Luna's steps kept getting louder and louder.

"Linaaaa, my dear sister! Where are you?"

Red head cursed under her nose. 'What does she want from me? I hope she forgot about that incident with her bath...'

When her sister walked away, Lina took her hand away and whispered to Gourry

"Have you met my sis' before?"

"You mean that strange-looking girl with purple hair? She is your sister?"

Lina sighed "Unfortunately, yes."

"But you don't look similar. Just look at her brea..."

"Okay, okay, I get it!" she snapped angrily "But do you know her?"

"Who?" he blinked scratching his head

Sorceress groaned and stood up, looking for the first time around. It seemed that they got into some kind of basement, gloomy, with filthy floor, snails on the walls, giant snails, giant, ugly...

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" screamed Lina jumping subconsciously in swordsman arms, hugging him to the point when he couldn't breathe."TAKE ME OUT OF HERE JUST TAKE ME OUT TAKE ME AWAY DO SOMETHING!"

Gourry shrugged and completely unaffected walked to the door and opened it.

"A-HAH! Here you are!" yelled Luna, who stood all the time behind them "Gourry, my dear, you can now leave my lil sister, and kiss me!" she yelled spreading her arms.

This yell was enough to bring Lina back to the reality

"AAAAAAAAAAH! GET ME BACK TO SLUGS, OH PLEASE, GET ME BACK!"

Blonde swordsman just tilted his head. "Now I'm confused" he stated.

"And Lina... well, nice to see you. I see you haven't grown up a bit." Said Luna eyeing the red head slowly.

"And you haven't... ummm... became less dangerous?" she replied

Purple haired woman rose her eyebrow "Are you two a couple or something?"

Just then sorceress realised, that she's still hugging Gourry, so she quickly jumped off.

"No, no, of course not" she laughed. If she could see that disappointment, that appeared in swordsman's eyes at this moment...

Luna smirked "Good. Because from this moment" she approached to him and pt a hand on his cheek, looking deeply into his eyes "He's mine."

Then, she closed her eyes and leaned, the distance between their faces diminishing...

When suddenly something sharp cut the air between their faces.

"YOU TWO! I mean, YOU THREE! GET YOUR BUTS BACK ON THE STAGE, NOW!" Haiiro suddenly landed in front of them with a crazy look.

Even Luna decided to keep silent and obey the command. Quietly, they walked away, first Luna and Gourry and then Lina, watching silently the couple walking before her.

* * *

Back to Paris...

"Are you having fun?"

Filia smiled mischievously. Feeling a bit dizzy, probably because of the wine, she leant closer to mazoku.

"Not a tiny little bit."

Xellos chuckled "Oh really?" he took a sip of his wine "Can you tell me why you decided to suggest a date back then?"

"Well, it was the only thing I was sure to put you off guard enough to slip you those false lyrics." Dragoness smiled again, but she would never admit, that the dinner wasn't that bad at all.

"And you wasn't afraid that I'll keep my promise?"

"We're sitting here and I'm okay. I'm not scared of you."

Mazoku frowned "And this can be your biggest mistake" he whispered he leaned closer, their heads now mere inches away. But Filia decided to be strong and didn't move away.

'We are brave, eh?' thought Xel and suddenly reached for her hand. Dragoness felt only something like a cold wind, for a moment everything went black and then, she was standing on the shore of a beautiful lake, the moon shining bright over the nearby forest.

She looked at the mazoku, who was still holding her hand. He looked at her through half-open eyes.

"Xellos? Why.."

"Shhhh" he quietened her placing a finger on her lips. Then he slowly lent forward and Filia felt a blush coming to her cheeks. She closed her eyes, waiting for their lips to meet

... and she waited... and waited...

She opened one eye just to see Xellos doing his best to hold back his laugh.

"You...should have...seen...your... face... HAHAHAHHAAHAHHAAHHAHAAA!" and he started to roll on the ground.

Dragoness twitched. "NAMAGOMI!" and she made attempt to kick him, but unfortunately, the ground beneath her was too slippery, and she ended with a loud 'splash' in the water.

That only made mazoku laugh harder.

"Oh my...HAHAHHAHAAa...that's the first time I've laughed so hard... Hahahahaa... I have tears in my eyes...HaHAHAHAAAAA"

"**Here you are!"** Haiiro suddenly appeared in the air over them "**Get back, now!** And what are you doing in the water, you'll get cold! And you can't because you're next!"

And with these words she caught them and teleported to the stage. They were welcomed by surprisingly crowded audience.

"Okay, now when we're all here, Filia, choose the song."

Dragoness stood up, grumbling about certain mazoku and walked to Haii.

Xellos rose his eyebrow looking at wet woman's back. Because of water, her white robes became slightly transparent (again). 'I wouldn't guess that she actually wore such lingerie...' he thought.

Dragoness looked at the lyrics and without any further thought she said "Xellos"

Then she stormed out to change.

"Great" said Haii "Now when we.. Where. Is. Zelgadis!" Haii twitched.

"Well, he kinda.. walked away?" said Amelia shyly

"What does it mean he 'walked away'?"

"He was acting odd and then he stood up and..." she shrugged. Haiiro facefaulted.

'If I won't end up with wrinkles and grey hair it'll be a miracle' she thought.

"Filia is probably ready by now, so you all around here, meet Filia Ul Copt as Shakira in 'Fool'!"

And with a great applouse the dragoness entered the stage. Her hair was slightly curly and she was wearing navy-blue dress and long, black boots. She looked at uncontrollably drooling mazoku in purple armchair and dramatically turned around.

"She dedicated this song to Xellos seeing this phrase..." in that moment Filia glanced again at Xel. He seemed to be listening carefully..ohhh...this will hurt his pride, she hoped.

"Hate your name!"

WOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Xellos sweatdropped. 'Why am I not surprised?'

Then, the music started and Filia begun to sing

_Tell me lies, slap me on the face, just... _

_Improvise, do something really clever, _

_That'll make me hate your name forever_

"No problem with that, I guess" mocked Lina, glancing at Xel. But with the corner of her eye she saw Luna sitting in certain swordsman lap. That spoiled her mood, so she crossed her arms and turned away.

_You might swear, you'd never touch a lady _

Then Xellos leaned to poke Amelia's arm.

"See?"

Then princess smacked him in head. "Baka."

_Well, let me say, you're not too far from _

_Maybe _

_Every day you find new ways to hurt me _

_But I can't help it if I'm just a fool _

Xellos nodded, so Filia took her shoe off and threw it at mazoku. The high-heel plunged exactly into Xel's left eye.

_Always having my heart set on you _

_Till the time you start changing the rules _

_I'll keep chasing the soles of your shoes _

_ahh, fool _

_God resigned, from hearing my old story_

_Every night, I'm paying hell for glory _

_I'm embarrassed but I'm much more sorry _

"Poor Miss Filia" sighed Amelia with stars in her eyes. Xellos became slightly green...

_All this pain, begins to feel like _

_Pleasure _

"Is she changing into mazoku?" asked Gourry. Lina just shrugged and Luna chuckled

"No, honey, but it was certainly a clever remark!"

Lina smirked at the comment. Slowly, a plan formed in her mind.

_With my tears, you'd make a sea a desert _

_Salt my wounds and I'll keep saying thank _

_You _

_But I can't help it if I'm just a fool _

_Always having my heart set on you _

Xellos kept watching singing woman with his good eye.

_Till the time you start changing the rules, _

_I'll keep chasing the soles of your shoes _

_Ahh, fool..._

She bowed and walked off the stage, not even bothering to look at Xellos.

"Wow, thank you, next is Xellos, come here!"

Purple haired priest took a piece of paper and looked at it. "Hmmm.. Fi." He said looking at the blonde who just came back. She turned abruptly, but she couldn't hide that small blush that appeared on her face.

Xellos smirked to himself and went backstage.

"Meanwhile, I see that there are some new people here, so why don't I have an interview with some of you..maybe..YOU!" she yelled and flew to on table. "Who are you?"

The boy with black messy hair straightened in chair. "My name is Harry Potter. And I'm a wizard."

"Oh... if we weren't in a room full of wizards and if I didn't know any magic, I would be impressed."

"You are a witch? You don't look like one..." he looked sceptically at her khaki pants and black bandanna.

"Oopsie, sorry." And Haii changed back to her black trousers, grey blouse and black cape. "But the looks don't matter. What can you say about yourself?"

"I'm the CHOSEN and I'm the only one who can kill Lord Voldemort."

:blink:blink: "who?"

Potter rose his eyebrow. "You-know-who?"

"No-I-don't" she rolled her eyes.

"How come..."

"Oh, it seems that Xel is ready, so bye Harry" she flew back to stage 'Creep' she thought.

"So, everyone, let me introduce Xellos Metallium as James Blunt in a song 'Goodbye my lover'"

YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYY!

Few guys started to run around yellin 'James! James! Yay!' and in the corner suddenly formed a fanclub of 'JB'.

Haii sweatdropped. "Yeeees... "

Xellos teleported to the middle of the stage with a big grin on his face.

He was wearing a light grey t-shirt, jeans jacked and black trousers. Audience went even louder, and some people were even throwing flowers.

"Xellos ded..." started Haiiro

Mazoku snatched the microphone from Haii's hand "I'd like to dedicate this song to Filia" he said and winked at her "I hope you're not angry anymore."

The blonde turned her head, but she couldn't help but smile. Haiiro snatched the microphone back, hitting mazoku in process.

"As I was saying... well, and he decided to dedicate this song seeing these words: My lover!"

"WHAAAAAAAAAAT!" yelled Slayers in unison.

"Filia, do you want to tell us something?" said Lina in annoyed voice 'First Luna and Gourry, not these two... What else!" she thought

"OF COURSE NOT?" answered blonde

"So where have you two dissapeard?" asked Amelia

"We were.." started Filia, but quickly realised, that truth was speaking against her.

"AHA!" yelled Amelia and made a pose on her armchair. "You said **'WE'**!"

Dragoness blushed like mad. "Shuddup'

Amelia wanted to say more, but music started and Xellos started to sing.

_Did I disappoint you or let you down? _

_Should I be feeling guilty or let the judges frown? _

Filia sent him a 'And-what-do-you-think' look. Mazoku grinned sheepishly.

_'Cause I saw the end before we'd begun, _

_Yes I saw you were blinded and I knew I had won. _

_So I took what's mine by eternal right. _

"Eckm."

Blonde woman looked at Amelia, who was glaring at her with crossed arms. "What?"

_Took your soul out into the night. _

_It may be over but it won't stop there, _

"May I ask you a personal question?" said Amelia

"NO!" answered Filia blushing furiously. 'I'll get you for that, Xellos!' she thought

_I am here for you if you'd only care. _

_You touched my heart you touched my soul. _

_You changed my life and all my goals. _

Xel glanced at Filia 'Hmm.. this part is actually true...'

_And love is blind and that I knew when, _

_My heart was blinded by you. _

_I've kissed your lips and held your head. _

Almost, at least...

_Shared your dreams and shared your bed. _

Filia was redder then tomato, but Amelia decided not to comment.

_I know you well, I know your smell. _

_I've been addicted to you. _

_Goodbye my lover. _

_Goodbye my friend. _

Some people in the audience stood up holding lighters. Immediately, security officers jumped at them.

"Are you nuts? You want to start fire?" yelled Tick at one of them

_You have been the one. _

_You have been the one for me. _

_I am a dreamer but when I wake, _

_You can't break my spirit - it's my dreams you take. _

_And as you move on, remember me, _

_Remember us and all we used to be _

Filia tried her best not to look at the man on the stage. 'No, I won't look at him. I won't I'm stronger than that...'

_I've seen you cry, I've seen you smile. _

_I've watched you sleeping for a while. _

"WHAT?" she snapped. Xellos sent her one of his trademark smiles and winked.

_I'd be the father of your child. _

_I'd spend a lifetime with you. _

'Maybe in your dreams' thought dragoness.

'Maybe not'

'Stop talking to me telepathically!'

'Okay'

_I know your fears and you know mine. _

Not that I have any...

_We've had our doubts but now we're fine, _

_And I love you, I swear that's true. _

With these words Xel's face became slightly green, but he managed to withstand that difficult word.

_I cannot live without you. _

Now he had to use his staff not to fall down. Everyone sweatdropped.

_Goodbye my lover. _

_Goodbye my friend. _

_You have been the one. _

_You have been the one for me_

In this moment ryuuzoku and mazoku looked at each other

_And I still hold your hand in mine. _

_In mine when I'm asleep. _

Filia couldn't turn away, the music somehow overwhelmed her...

_And I will bear my soul in time, _

_When I'm kneeling at your feet. _

Indeed, Xellos kneeled, only about 10 yards from her feet.

_Goodbye my lover. _

_Goodbye my friend. _

_You have been the one. _

_You have been the one for me. _

_I'm so hollow, baby, I'm so hollow. _

_I'm so, I'm so, I'm so hollow._

He bowed as the audience went crazy. Then he turned away on his heel and headed to the backstage, closely followed by Filia's eyes...

Lina glanced again at the couple in her left. They knew each other from..something like 15min, and it looked as if they knew each other from years. Now, they were both laughing, from somethin that Lina didn't hear.

"And then I've said 'If you want to wear my blouses, you have to have something you can put in them! HAhahahahhaaa"

"Don't you have enough jokes about my chest?" said Lina angrily "What do you want from Gourry anyway?"

Luna smiled "I just want to marry him!"

Surprisingly, Lina's and Gourry's reaction was the same "WHAAAAAAAAT?"

"You've heard. I know my dear Gourry loves me, because who would've left such tip if not someone who loved me?"

Lina thought for a while "You're talking about that big pile of money I forgot to take with me?"

"Nope. I'm talking about this money he left me, because he likes me. Didn't you"

"Ummm.. no?" answered Gourry

"Oh, you're such a sweetie." Said Luna giving him a peck on the cheek.

Lina turned around. She knew that her sister is preety, seductive and all, but why Gourry? Why not Zel...' then it hit her "And where is Zel?"

Amelia looked at the empty armchair on her right. "Oh, I almost forgot..."

Meanwhile, in one room at the backstage...

":groan: Why am I so stupid?" said Zelgadis out loud. He was alone, in a big, dusty room, so he had no problem with talking to himself. Everyone is frustrated sometimes, and for Zelgadis, it was one these times.

"Why can't I just walk away? What makes me go back to her?"

"Maybe you love her?"

Zelgadis turned around, surprised.

"Who are you? Where are you?"

"I'm your inner voice and I am here to help you."

Zel grumbled again and sat on the floor. "Great, now I hear voices."

"You love that girl, don't you?"

Zel crossed his arms "No, I just like her... very much.. She's my friend!"

"And nothing more?"

"Does it matter? I'm chimera and she's a princess! She shouldn't be seen with a freak like me!"

"But it doesn't bother her how you look like."

This voice was getting irritating "And how do you know? Probably she's just sorry for a freak like me."

"She cares,"

"She's just nice and I don't need no pity."

"Don't you think she likes the way you are, not how you look like?"

"No, who can like a freak like me, or more importantly, lo..." Zel stopped, astonished by his own words

"A-hah! So you admit you love her!"

Zel got more frustrated "Okay, I think that she's preety, but.. she deserves more."

"And what if she doesn't want more Zeldagais?"

"Zelgadis."

"Sorry, and by the way, your life is already crummy, you have nothing to loose!"

"Oh, that really made me feel better."

"You said that you're almost positive she feels the same way...Why don't you at least try to ask her out?"

"Okay, okay, I'll do it."

"I can't see your enthusiasm."

Zel sighed. This inner voice was almost as irritating as Lina. He rose his hand "I'll do it."

"Aren't you happy with your decision?"

"I am."

"Show me."

Zel stood up and thought about Amelia. Suddenly, he felt as if he was light as a feather. He jumped high n the air and yelled "I'LL DO IT!"

Them, one of the walls went up and Zelgadis sweatdropped seeing the audience in front of him. "Wha?"

He looked at his left and saw his companions on the stage, looking at him with astonishment in their eyes and Haii, rolling with the laughter.

"Hahahaha..That's a good one... HAHAHAHHAHahaaaaa... You must have accidentally walked into our secret room...and thanks to the microphones, we could hear everything you said... and meet Carl, out DJ, or 'your inner voice' ... hahahahahhahahah..."

It took a while for Zel to realise, that he was tricked, that everyone has heard him talking to himself about his feelings to Amelia.. not actually to himself, but to a geek in blue shirt, glasses and brown hair... but nevertheless...

'Oh f... Amelia.. she heard everything...' Zelgadis realised and felt that he begun to sweat badly.

Deciding to face his destiny, Zel looked at Amelia...

* * *

And here I prove that I'm annoying brat and I'll end this chapter. I thought that I'll have no ideas, but it seems that I managed to continue... if I'm not mistaken, I'm in a halfway of the story.. maybe I should put 3 songs in a chapter... it would mean less pointless events... but.. I don't know. I'll try to start the next chapter in a week, but I can't promise anything. The thing that usually makes me write a new chapter, is a review or e-mail telling me to do so ; ) (this time it was** I.N. **)

Sorry. Thanks. R&R : D


	12. Duet! two duets

... Ummm... hi?

I'm sorry I haven't updated in such long time, but... school?

Lack of time?

My plants were sick? ... That's stupid... I know there is no way you could forgive me, but... nah. Just read. And enjoy, I hope.

* * *

Special thanks to:

Niele-Mzk

Iceo N. – double! .. heh heh.. sorry? T-T

* * *

Zelgadis gulped and slowly turned his head. His heart beat so fast that it had nearly jumped out of his chest and his hands were trembling. There were thousands thoughts in his head, but none of them seemed to be helpful in such situation.

He looked at Amelia.

But she was gone.

Zel blinked, and then there could be heard flushing. Everyone looked in the direction of toilets just to see the young princess walking out.

"I missed something?"

"NO!" yelled Zel before anyone had a chance to say anything. "Everything's under control... and we were just about to start the next round, ne?" he caught Haiiro by shoulders, carried her to the middle of the stage, handled her the microphone, then he proceeded to put everyone in their places.

Amelia tiled her head but decided to overlook Zel's strange behaviour.

Haii cleared her throat. "If so... okay, shall we go on? The nest round will be..."

She paused dramatically, but no one seemed to notice.

":sweatdrop: groan... In the next round our heroes will be supposed to sing in... DUETS!"

YAAAAAAAYYY!

For once, the audience seemed to enjoy what was going on. On the contrary, Slayers froze.

Lina was first to regain her balance

"Can we choose the duets on our own?" she asked

"Of course." Haii smiled

"But?" asked Zelgadis knowing that it's too beautiful to be true.

"The only condition is that these pairs should be man – woman."

Slayers groaned. No one said it aloud, but it was obvious that this single condition made the answer for 'who's gonna be with who?' obvious.

Haii grinned at her own shrewdness. "Okay, so Lina, you're first. I suppose that you'll choose Gourry?"

Redhead grumbled. 'This annoying brat, I'm gonna show her... I'm not going to choose Gourry! Instead...' she looked at her companions. But the thing that caught her attention was Luna, in Gourry's lap, visibly enjoying her time. The swordsman's face was inscrutable as always, but you never know...

"Yes, Gourry, come on!"

"Hai!" yelled the swordsman and with surprising enthusiasm he run towards Lina, leaving her sister alone.

"Hey!" shouted Luna after him. Them, she looked left top see the others staring at her. "He's such a sweetie, isn't he?" she winked and then turned back.

Redhead caught Gourry by arm and went backstage, sticking her tongue at Haiiro along the way. She grinned in reply and turned back to audience.

"Okay, people, now I'm going to give you again a chance to present yourselves. So.. maybe you?"

She flew to one table where five girls sat. Except for the fact, that each of them had a different hair colour (quite unbelievable coincidence) they looked like a normal teenagers. The girl with red hair spoke first.

"Umm... Hi. My name is Will, and these are Irma, Teranee, Cornelia and Hay Lin". The girls waved.

"And what can you say about yourselves?"

"We have magical powers!" yelled the Chinese girl and blonde quickly smacked her over the head.

"Be quiet!" she hissed in annoyed voice

"But... they all in here are strange and they know magic, so I thought that we don't have to keep our secret in here..."

Blonde rolled her eyes.

"Girls, come on, we should be having fun!" said the girl with brown hair "It's Teranee's birthday!"

The girl with dark skin poked her meal with a fork.

"I don't know...it looks suspicious..." she said and at the same moment her meal grew to a size of a small elephant and ate her.

"Teranee!" yelled the girls in unison and jumped on the monster.

"It seems that it was her last birthday..." commented girl with brown hair.

"IRMA!"

"Okay, okay, I'm sorry."

"We have to use our powers!" yelled the redhead. Haiiro sweatdropped looking at Will, who took a pink pendant and suddenly, everything began to glow. Five girls rose in the air, then their clothes disappeared and they were surrounded by strange colourful bubbles.

In the moment when girls clothes vanished, there could be heard sound of photographs.

"Security! Take care of these perverts!"

Then, the bubbles around the girls broke and they flew out, in different clothing and with some extra...'things' here and there...

"They don't look so childish now, ne?" asked Zangulus staring at the blonde and drooling.

"Umm... aren't you married?" asked the random onlooker who sat beside him.

"Naaaah..."

"WATER!" "EARTH!" "WIND!" girls cried trying to defeat the monster, but he only blinked and ate them all in one bite. The creature burped loudly and walked away.

No one actually cared.

Haii flew back to stage. "Lina and Gourry should be ready by now, so greet them with applause!"

:crickets chirp:

":groan: Hello? Guys! Applause?"

"But they're not coming!" yelled someone in the audience.

Haii sweatdropped. "What's taking them so long? ... maybe they haven't noticed that there are two changing rooms..."

**Before the changing room...**

"Linaaaaa... what are you doing there? I'm waiting here for hours!"

"One more minute, jellyfish brains!" muttered Lina stuffing her bra. How come all these clothes she had to wear were such low-cut? Then, something hit her.

"Gourry... we didn't chose the song!"

"Yes."

"But out clothes are here!"

"Yes?"

"It means that she chose for us!"

"Yes?" swordsman answered again. This answer seemed to be proper in any situation.

"Great..." Lina muttered something under her nose and soon the door opened. Gourry turned his head to see the sorceress and gasped.

Lina was wearing long, white low-cut dress, and had a lot of diamond jewellery.

"Whoa...you look great!"

"Thanks..." redhead blushed slightly. "Now you, go and change."

The swordsman walked in and closed the door. Lina leant against the wall.

**On the stage...**

Haii was walking in circles and muttering words that are not to be written down. Luna was daydreaming about her wedding, Amelia and Filia were gossiping about Lina's and Gourry's strange behaviour, Zel was thinking and Xel was bored.

'Hummm.. what can I do...' thought mazoku. Then his gaze landed on Zelgadis. 'Wheee...I haven't bothered him in a long time!'

Zelgadis was too lost in thought to notice the forthcoming doom...

'How ironic...now everyone in this room know about my feelings for Amelia but her.' He thought.

Suddenly, arms wrapped around his neck. Zel looked quickly behind to see Xel's tear-shed face.

"You..you really meant that?"

"WHAT, YOU FREAK?"

"That you love her, not meeee!" and he started to cry.

"For God's sake, get off me!"

"But I wuv youuuu..."

"AAAAAAAAH!" Zel started to panic as he couldn't take Xellos of himself.

"STOP IT!" they both turned to see annoyed Haii. "I'm already annoyed, you don't have to piss me off more!"

"Hai." They answered politely and sat back. Zelgadis glared at Xel, but he only winked.

Zel blushed and groaned. 'I swear, one of these days...'

**Backstage... **

"Gourry?"

"Yup?"

Redhead bit her lips. "Umm... are you planning something with Luna?"

"No." The girl sighed with relief.

"So you...umm... don't like her?" she asked with hope.

There was a while of silence. "Well... I like her. But she's creepy."

Lina wanted to ask one more thing but then the door opened and Gourry got out of the room. Now, it was Lina's turn to mouthdrop. He was wearing a navy blue – grey shirt and dark jeans. The shirt was unbuttoned at the top (because it was a bit too narrow).

Gourry scratched his head. "Why are you asking?"

"Heh, just curious. Let's go."

When they walked on the stage they were greeted with Haiiro jumping on them and yelling "HOPE YOU ENJOYED YOUR TIME! WHAT WERE YOU DOING?"

"Changing?"

"And of course you haven't noticed that there are TWO changing rooms? Don't answer, we're already late. These are your lyrics. Oh, I forgot to mention that in this round **I'M** choosing songs for you. Now GO!" she yelled and pushed them on the scene.

"Ladies etc, meet Lina as Whitney Houston and Gourry as Enrique Iglesias in "Could I have this kiss forever"!"

"yay."

Not discouraged by this 'very enthusiastic' greeting, Lina and Gourry begun their performance. Well, first Gourry. As the music started he turned to Lina.

**_Over and over I look in your eyes  
You are all I desire  
You have captured me _**

Lina blushed and looked shyly away. '  
_**  
I want to hold you  
I want to be close to you  
I never want to let go **_

He reached out and grabbed her hand. Redhead looked at him questioningly and he gave her a warm smile. Then he pointed at her lyrics, signing that it's her turn.  
_  
I wish that this night would never end  
I need to know _

"awww...how sweet..." sighed Filia

"oohhh.. how sickening." Mumbled Xellos.

"Bucket?" asked The Tick

Now Lina and Gourry sang together.  
_  
Could I hold you for a lifetime  
Could I look into your eyes  
Could I have this night to share this night together _

"Umm..intresting" commented Amelia  
_  
Could I hold you close beside me  
Could I hold you for all time  
Could I,could I have this kiss forever  
Could I,could I have this kiss forever,forever _

Suddenly, Zelgadis felt a warm breath on his neck. Terrified, he turned around, just to see Xellos dressed up as a girl.

"Hi, honey!"

SMACK

"Bye, honey" hissed Zel through gritted teeth, putting his clenched fist back on the armrest._  
_

Lina began to sing.

_  
Over and over I've dreamed of this night  
Now you're here by my side  
You are next to me _

Lina sent to Gourry a dreamy look, while security had to hold Luna.

_  
I want to hold you  
And touch you and taste you  
And make you want no one but me _

_  
_Then, Gourry joined,

_  
I wish that this kiss could never end  
Oh baby, please... _

_  
I don't want any night to go by  
Without you by my side _

The swordsman squeezed her hand lightly.

_  
I just want all my days  
Spent being next to you _

"They're doing it for 5 years, if I'm correct" said Zel

_  
Lived for just loving you  
And baby, oh by the way _

_  
Could I hold you for a lifetime  
Could I look into your eyes  
Could I have this night to share this night together  
Could I hold you close beside me  
Could I hold you for all time _

Gourry slightly leant forward...

_  
Could I,could I have this kiss forever _

Lina rose her head...

_  
Could I,could I have this kiss forever, forever..._

"YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY"

The applause pulled them both out of trance and they quickly jumped away from each other.

"Heh, umm... You've done pretty well" whispered Lina

"Thanks" answered Gourry.

"Okay, lovebirds, go away and change, remember that THERE ARE two CHANGING ROOMS, now Zelgadis!"

The man stood up and reluctantly walked to Haii.

"Okay, so who's your choice?"

Zel sighed, turned around and looked at three woman he had to choose from.

'Wait a minute, three?' he looked closer. Amelia, check. Filia, check. Xel...Xellos. Of course.

Mazoku was now dressed in a blue top and white skirt. He waved to Zel seductively.

'That's sick...' thought Zelgadis. Thankfully, Filia spotted what our fruitcake was doing and smacked him with her heavy mace.

'Okay, now, who I shall choose?...' wondered Zel. Xellos got up and smiled sheepishly at Filia, she pouted. Then Xellos got up and stood behind Amelia's armchair. Then he started to poke her.

'Let's put it that way – I'm only rescuing Amelia from that crazy mazoku, Filia will handle him. It's not that I want to sing with her because of...anything else' thought Zel.

"I choose Amelia!"

The princess jumped in the air happily and run to Zel, who sweatdropped.

"Oh THANK YOU, THANK YOU THANK YOU!"

"No prob." Answered Zel quietly.

"Wow, who'd have guessed. Now go and change!"

On their way to the changing rooms, Zel and Amelia went past Lina and Gourry. Seeing them, redhead grinned.

"Have a good fun!" she yelled.

"You and Gourry surely had.." answered Zelgadis.

For the rest of the way they heard Lina's "Let me go! Let me get that stupid brat and kick his rocky as$!"

"OKAY PEOPLE! I'm _really_ trying to entertain you, would you please appreciate it? Okayy... now I'm going to talk with... YOU!"

She flew to a table where, oh what a surprise, again five girls sat. But they looked different. Again, they had different hair colours, but they were unnaturally tall, they had super long legs, they had large eyes and were all dressed in sparkling and colourful clothes.

_'Why I chose them?' wondered Haii_

_"Because you want to humiliate them?" answered Haii's devil._

"Why, hello, who are you?"

The girls giggled. The redhead answered "We are the Winx club!"

"And what can you tell me about yourselves?"

"Well, we're studying in a magic school, and well, I come from Earth and my name is Bloom."

"My name is Stella, I'm beautiful and I'm a princess." Said the blonde.

"My name is Flora and I like flowers" said the one with brown hair.

"My name is Musa and... I like music?" said a girl with pigtails.

"My name is Techna and I'm smart in here." Said the girl with purple hair.

:crickets chirp:

The silence woke up Haii, who seemed to doze off during this 'sweet presentation'.

"Great...yawn."

"When do you plan to have a show with us?" asked Stella "We know that we are beautiful and all, but the next weekend we can't because we have dates, and well... next weekend we are also having dates... maybe next weekend? Because I'm planning to break up with... umm... what's his name..." the blonde seemed to be lost in such a long sentence.

"Well... how to say it... I'm not working with such freaks?" said Haii and flew back to stage.

"Alright, now we're waiting for Zel and Amelia, WHO SHOULD BE HERE IN A FEW SECONDS OR THEY'LL REGRET IT!"

In the backstage, Amelia looked worriedly at the door of changing room.

"Miss Haiiro is calling us!"

"I'm going, I'm going." Answered Zel, butting his waistcoat on. He was now wearing an orange shirt, brown waistcoat and black pants. When he tied his shoes, he opened the door and faced Amelia.

"Oh f..." slipped from his mouth, but he managed to cover it quickly.

Amelia was wearing a green, low-cut, tight green blouse with cuts on the sides, short jeans mini skirt, knee-length socks and sports boots. She also had golden earrings, lots of various necklaces and some bracelets round her wrists.

One word: SeXy.

"Something wrong?"

Zel mentally slapped himself. "No, just...ummm...nothing?"

"Oh..why were you looking like that on me? Maybe I have my blouse back to front?"

" I mean... arggh.. we better be going."

They walked on the stage greeted with loud applause.

Haii went during the break to Carl, the operator, and told him to play the tape with applause when she gives him a sign.

"Okay, now you'll see Zelgadis as Will.I.Am and Amelia as, umm... The Pussycat Dolls in a song 'Beep'! Here you are, the lyrics."

The pair studied them quickly and blushed.

"You are evil..." said Zel

"Be thankful that there are 'beep's!" the girl replied, grinning.

The music started and Zelgadis, red as tomato, started to sing. Talk. Nevermind.

_It's funny how a man only thinks about the **BEEP**_

_You got a real big heart, but I'm looking your** BEEP**_

"Hmm... That's right..." said Lina

_You got real big brains, but I'm looking at your_** BEEP**

_Girl, there ain't no pain in me looking at your_** BEEP**

Amelia blushed. Zel sent her a 'I'm sorry, but it's in the text' look.

Now Amelia sang

_I don't give a_** BEEP**

_Keep looking at my_** BEEP**

"Is it order?" asked Lina

_'Cause it don't mean a thing if you're looking at my_** BEEP**_  
I'm a do my thing while you're playing with your._** BEEP**

Amelia's eyes nearly popped out and now she looked at Zel. He was hiding his face in hands. That was just TOO embarrassing.

_  
Ha, ha-ha, ha-ha, ha-ha _

Every boy's the same  
Since I been in the seventh grade  
They been trying to get with me  
Trying to Ha, ha-ha, ha, ha-ha

"Well... if she had a figure like that then, I'm not surprised..." said Zangulus

_  
They always got a plan  
To be my one and only man  
Want to hold me with their hands  
Want to Ha, ha-ha, ha, ha-ha _

"I know something about it..." sighed Filia. Xellos choked.

"Really?"

_  
I keep turning them down  
But, they always come around  
Asking me to go around  
That's not the way it's going down _

"She was of course waiting for Zel! He's not that importunate." Lina grinned

"Hum..that's very probable." Said Gourry.

'Cause they only want  
Only want my ha, ha-ha  
Ha, ha-ha

'I'm not like that.. am I?' wondered Zel. Then he noticed that he was staring at Amelia's ha-ha-ha. That worried him.

_  
Only want what they want  
But, na, ah-ah  
Na, ah-ah _

Again Zel

_  
It's funny how a man only thinks about the_** BEEP**

_You got a real big heart, but I'm looking your_** BEEP**

_You got real big brains, but I'm looking at your_** BEEP**

_Girl, there ain't no pain in me looking at your_** BEEP**

"Lina, what are these beeps?"

_  
_Amelia was red like a tomato and she felt rather uncomfortable singing such song in front of drooling men. Especially in such clothes...

_  
I don't give a_** BEEP**

_Keep looking at my_** BEEP**

How come everyone decided to comply with this...

_'Cause it don't mean a thing if you're looking at my_** BEEP**_  
I'm a do my thing while you're playing with your_** BEEP**

_Ha, ha-ha, ha-ha, ha-ha _

You didn't know that no  
Don't mean yes, it means no

Zelgadis mentally slapped himself. That was ridiculous. He had to stop staring at Amelia. He turned his head and looked at the rest of his friends.

He didn't like Lina's smirk, not a bit.

_  
So just hold up, wait a minute  
Let me put my two cents in it  
One, just be patient  
Don't be rushing  
Like you're anxious _

"Hmm.. It sounds to me that Zelgadis is perfect for Ame!" commented Lina, loud enough for Zel to hear. Then he looked at Xellos. Mazoku winked at him and sent him a kiss.

'Why me?' he wondered and turned back to Amelia

_And two, oh just two us  
So try to get your Ahh _

Do you know that I know?  
And I don't want to go there

Only want  
Only want my ha, ha-ha  
Ha, ha-ha  
Only want what they want  
But, na, ah-ah  
Na, ah-ah  
_  
_Zel:  
_  
It's funny how a man only thinks about the_** BEEP**

'I'm not like that'

_You got a real big heart, but I'm looking your_** BEEP**

'I don't think so. No! She has a big heart, but I'm not lookin...argh.'

_You got real big brains, but I'm looking at your_** BEEP**

'No comments.'

_Girl, there ain't no pain in me looking at your_** BEEP**

'Is there?' with every thought Zel was becoming more and more depressed.

_  
_And Amelia's turn.

_  
I don't give a_** BEEP**

_Keep looking at my_** BEEP**

_'Cause it don't mean a thing if you're looking at my_** BEEP**

_I'm a do my thing while you're playing with your_** BEEP**

_Ha, ha-ha, ha-ha, ha-ha _

"Linaaa.. what Zel is playing with?"

_  
Ooh, you've got it bad I can tell  
You want it bad, but oh well _

It was a funny view – you couldn't tell which of the singers is redder.

_  
Dude, what you got for me  
Is something I  
Something I don't need  
Oh!  
_

'Only one chorus...'thought Zel

It's funny how a man only thinks about the** BEEP**

_You got a real big heart, but I'm looking your_** BEEP**

Amelia glanced at Zelgadis. Well, that's true that because of her... shape, she was always attracting a lot of men, but...she believed that Zel is different. He should know the best that looks don't matter.

_You got real big brains, but I'm looking at your_** BEEP**

_Girl, there ain't no pain in me looking at your_** BEEP**

_  
_Amelia:  
_  
I don't give a_** BEEP**

_Keep looking at my_** BEEP**

'As long as you have pure intentions...'

_'Cause it don't mean a thing if you're looking at my_** BEEP**

_I'm a do my thing while you're playing with your_** BEEP**

_Ha, ha-ha, ha-ha, ha-ha  
_

"YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!"

Carl didn't have to play the applause tape, the audience was furious. Amelia and Zelgadis smiled at each other, bowed and walked off.

"Hey, babe, don't walk away! I love you!" could be heard from the audience. The unfortunate man was quietened by The Tick's fist.

**At the backstage...**

Before the changing rooms Ame and Zel stopped. There was an awkward silence for a while.

"Ummm... good performance." Finally said Amelia

"You too" replied Zelgadis quietly. In his mind, there was a hard-fought war between his thoughts.

_'Tell her! Keeping secrets from her has led you nowhere!_

_But... but what if she thinks that I'm only going for her looks? _

_You'll tell her the truth!_

_But what if she doesn't understand me? 'Hey, you know, I love you, you have great butt, but it's not the only thing I see in you, you are also'... argh._

_It doesn't have sense..._

_You don't have to tell her that you love her here and now! Just tell her that you like her for who she is! After this song she may have her doubts...'_

"Umm..Amelia? Can we talk?"

Amelia looked at him uncertingly "Yes?"

"I just wanted to tell you that... umm... you look great, but it's not the only thing that I see in you. Just in case. That song was quite disturbing."

"Yes... don't worry, you're the last person I'd accuse of judging people by looks. But thanks." She said and gave him a quick peck on the cheek. Then, she ran to the changing room.

Zelgadis touched the place where her lips were few seconds ago. He leant against the wall with a dreaming look in his eyes. 'Whoa' was all that he could think now.

* * *

Okay, not that bad moment to end. I decided to write two chapters at once, or at least try to write the most of the second one, so I could update in a week or something.

Thankfully, I already have a song for Xel and Fi  
I'm actually in need for some funny/disturbing lyrics, for I'm planning the next round to be particularly unpleasant for Slayers crew ;D  
I like being evil. And the song that Zel'll sing is actually the song I wrote this whole fanfic for! I hope it'll turn out the way I want it to. Nevermind.

R&R

Sorry again, and remember, next chapter in a week! Or you can kill me.


	13. Duet n' beginning of break

Well, bad news, you can't kill me, I've updated! Yes, I can keep my word...

Okay... maybe not at all.. I'm sorry, but today I've realised that tomorrow I'm having a great chemistry test and I haven't learned at all... oopsie. If I fail it's your fault.

You can kill me. Taking into consideration the forthcoming French Test... when I think about it, the only thing that comes to my mind is a song from 'Wedding Singer'

_Somebody kill me please, somebody kill me please..._

I'm gonna reward the one who'll do this. I deserve.

* * *

Thank youuuuuuuu tooo: 

**Niele-Mzk **

**Iceo**

**Rukia-sama**

**cherryblossom51**

My funny furry/rubber ball would give you a kiss, but everyone says it is annoying, sop I won't.

* * *

"Okay, folks, now it's time for our last pair! Filia, Xellos, your turn!" yelled Haiiro 

"Do we have to?" asked Filia with hope in her voice

'No." her face brightened "..But then you won't get your prize!"

Dragoness sighed and reluctantly walked backstage, with cheerful mazoku close behind her.

"Yay, a song, we're going to sing a song.." he hummed.

"And what are you so happy about?" the woman snapped

"For the first time in this show your performance will be good, and all thanks to ME and my TALENT" he grinned

Filia pouted "Oh, really? Well, you're right. If you're talking about your talent to torture the others."

Xel twitched "Well, I must admit that hearing you sing is the greatest torture I've ever seen."

"Oh yeah?" Filia took her mace and jumped at Xel.

Everyone sweatdropped hearing this argument.

":sigh: they're like Europe at the beginning of 20th century..." commented Haii.

:crickets chirp:

"Because, you know, it was like that!" yelled Haii taking from nowhere the map of Europe at pointing at it "First, there was the unification of Italy! And to unify, Italy decided to have an alliance with France! Then, they had an alliance with Germany, who was also unifying! And few ears later they declared war on France! Quite similar situation happened on the Balkans, but.. that's..." the girl looked around just to see the puzzlement of other's faces.

"All I wanted top say, that sometimes they're fighting and sometimes that don't."

"You couldn't say it like that at the beginning?" Said Lina impatiently

"Sorry, history test. I'm brainwashed" smiled Haii

Backstage...

"Zel? Are you all right? " asked Amelia, knocking at the door of his changing room "I think I've heard Mrs. Filia and Mr. Xellos coming..."

The door opened, and Zelgadis staggered out.

"Are you okay? You don't look well..." said Amelia looking at his flush and his absent look. She put a hand on his forehead. "And you have temperature...I'll take you to the doctor!"

"No!... No need..." managed to say Zel, but the princess was already dragging him at the stage.

The passed by Filia and Xellos, who looked after them.

"Where are they going?"

"Probably to find a quiet room, only for them two..."

SMACK

"Pervert."

"Sincerely yours..."

Back on stage...

"Mrs. Haiiro! Mrs. Haiiro! There's something wrong with Zelgadis!" yelled Amelia, ignoring her friend's weak protests.

"Ha? ...groan..." Haiiro sat helplessly on the floor "I need a break.."

"Where is the doctor?" asked princess

"There is no doctor in here..." mumbled Haii

"What? But..but...Zel..."

"Take him to the kitchen, the cook said that she's been a nurse for ten years. Go to the bar and then take the first door at the left."

"Tanks!" and she ran away

Haiiro sighed and stood up, only to see Lina and Gourry, leaning over her with a strange looks in their eyes.

"You've said 'bar'?"

And there was heard something like the roar of a lion. It was coming from their stomachs.

"All right, all right, just let Filia and Xel sing their song, and then there'll be a break!"

The sorceress and swordsman lowered their heads and walked away.

"Okay... now, who's gonna entertain us... maybe...you!" and she flew to a table where sat a girl with large, gold eyes, brown hair combined in something that looked like cross between a bun and a ponytail, in white kimono. "Who are you?"

"My name is Myu." She answered quietly, but not shyly.

"Uhm, and what do you like to do?"

She smiled ominously. "I hunt for demons."

Haii sweatdropped. 'I wonder how many freaks are in this room' "Something more?"

"My full name is Vampire Princess Myu." She answered and looked at the exit door.

There was a men who was trying to sneak out, but seeing that his plan is ruined, he smiled sheepishly and waved.

Myu jumped in the air and yelled "Lava!"

Behind the man appeared a tall, dark figure. The man turned around with "heh heh, hi?"

The dark figure stuck his pale hand with long red claws and with one quick move sliced the man in half.

'uhm.. I wonder if he's gay?' thought Haiiro, looking at his nails 'maybe they are fake?'

The man scream, and then, in a puff of smoke, all three dissapeard.

There was again silence in the room.

"Ookayy...I hope Fi and Xel are ready..."

Haii flew back on the stage "So, you all, allow me to introduce you to Filia ul Copt as Delta Goodream and Xellos Metallium as Brian McFadden in a song..."

"Wait!" Filia run at the stage and fell down, due to her high hells and knee-length, tight blue dress.

Xellos appeared shortly after her, in dark blue jeans and cream T-shirt. "I guess she wanted to tell you not to put us in a mushy-washy romantic song!"

Dragoness stood up shakily, mumbled something about high heels. Then, she adjusted her dress. "Exactly."

Haii grinned from ear to ear "Too late!"

Filia an Xellos facefaulted. "Just give us the lyrics, kay?" asked Xellos pleadingly.

"My, my, what an amusing sight, the Great General and Priest of Zelas Metallium _begging_ for something..."

Xellos grumbled at snatched the lyrics from her and gave to Filia on card.

The music started as the pair looked at their lyrics, blushing heavily.

'I don't like this...' thought Filia

'Me too... I like to embarrass other people, but now I almost feel guilty...'

'uhummm... Xellos? What are you doing in my head?' she shot him an angry glare

He rose his eyebrows 'I am? Oh, sorry, I do it out of habit'

She blinked 'Habit...Nevermind, I'll get you for that later' she broke the connection.

Xellos smiled to himself

"So, our lovely pair is going to sing 'Almost here!' applause, please!" yelled Haiiro, showing to Carl the 'sign' to put on the 'applause' tape

"YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY"

Xellos took a step forth and sent a stunning smile to his fans, then he started to sing

_**Did I hear you right? **_

_**Cause I thought you said **_

_**Let's think it over **_

He turned around to Filia. She sent him a 'don't annoy me' look.

It's never stopped him, ne?

_**You have been my life **_

_**And I never planned **_

Growing old without you 

Xel took blonde's hand, but she quickly snapped it away. "Back off!" she hissed

_**Shadows bleeding through the light **_

_**Where the love once shined so bright **_

_**Came without a reason **_

_**Don't let go on us tonight **_

_**Love's not always black and white  
**_

That line stuck her 'Black and white... just what I thought about mazoku and ryuzoku...'

_**Haven't I always loved you? **_

Dragoness glared at him and started:

_But when I need you _

_You're almost here _

"Almost, that's good" commented Lina "Like all this times when we needed him, he was laughing his head off on a nearby tree.."

_And I know that's not enough _

_And when I'm with you _

_I'm close to tears _

Right...

_'cause your only almost here_

Rather 'you're too here...'

And again Xellos sang:

_**I would change the world **_

_**If I had a chance **_

_**Oh won't you let me **_

He looked at her seriously and rose his eyebrow.

Filia pouted 'I hate the way I don't know if he's serious or if he's playing a trick on me..'

_**Treat me like a child **_

_**Throw your arms around me **_

_**Oh please protect me **_

Filia joined

_Bruise and battered by your words_

'And your mace...'

_Days are shattered, how it hurts _

Xel:

Oh, haven't I always loved you? 

Filia glared at him

_But when I need you _

_You're _almost_ here _

_And I know that's not enough _

And when I'm with you 

That's all the time when I **don't** need you...

_I'm close to tears _

_'cause your only almost here _

Xel joined

_Bruise and battered by your words _

_Days are shattered, now it hurts _

And Xellos' solo:

Haven't I always loved you? 

Filia felt more and more disturbed by the way he sang that particular line.

_But when I need you _

_You're almost here _

She sang these lines directly at Xel

Well I never knew how far behind I'd left you - He sang back looking pleadingly at her and offering her a hand. Surprisingly, she took it. 

_And when I hold you _

_You're almost here _

Well I'm sorry that I took our love for granted He shrugged and tightened the grip on her hand. 

Together:

_And now I'm with you _

_I'm close to tears _

Cause I know I'm almost here 

_Only almost here_

"Interesting, indeed..."

Xellos and Filia quickly turned around just to se The Beastmaster Zelas herself, sitting in the first row with a cigarette in her hand.

"Xellos, I knew that you liked your little dragon, but I have a strange feeling that I've missed something..." she said slowly

Xellos looked terrified at his hand holding Filias' and a bit to suddenly threw her away. She landed behind the curtains with a loud THUNK.

Zelas rose her eyebrow. "So, there's nothing you want to tell me?"

"No, Jouu-sama" he smiled sheepishly, rubbing his neck.

"Xellos, you fruitcake! What has come over you to throw me like that? " yelled angry Filia coming back from the backstage, hair in a mess and ripped dress.

Mazoku looked from fuming dragon to his Mistress. 'heh, heh... I should be going now...' he thought and dissapeard.

"NAMAGOMI, I'm GOING TO GET YOU!"

"XELLOS! I'M NOT GOING TO TOLERATE SUCH BEHAVIOUR!"

There was a while of silence and Zelas looked at Filia.

"You have a bad influence on him."

IN THA KITCHEN...

"So what's wrong with him?" asked Amelia worriedly, while a large dark-skinned cook examined her friend.

"Well... either he's deadly ill, or... he has problems with his intestines."

Zelgadis listened to them with annoyance 'Why it has to be me... stupid body, going crazy after contact with Amelia... stupid hormones...and stupid inability to express myself clearly!' he thought

" ...so you should go out, I'll take care of him." Said the cook

Zel woke up from his thoughts "Wha?"

"Don't worry Zel, Mrs. Brown said that after this you'll be alright!" smiled Amelia brightly

"But.. No! You don't..."

"Good luck!" she replied and walked out of the room.

Zelgadis slowly turned around to face the cook, who was actually putting on long, rubber gloves.

"So, you're that guy who's declared his feelings to that lil' girl, eh?"

"Yes... apparently..." he lowered his head, avoiding her gaze.

"Well, you're not the first one who's gone mad with a girl. And not the last one. Listen to my wise advise, kid" she put a hand on his shoulder. He looked at her uncertainly. "You can't run away, cause that'd hurt not only you, but her also. You have to say what you think right into her face, or she'll never know, and you'd spend the rest of your life regretting. Understand?"

Zel nodded.

"I don't mean that you have to run to her right away and yell so that whole world would hear, like you did" she winked "You should invite her to a quiet place, for both of you are shy, as I see. This will do. And you don't have to be afraid of her rejecting you. Trust the ol' cook, she knows when two people like each other" she grinned from ear to ear.

He replied the smile "Thanks."

"No prob. Now lay on your stomach and relax..." she said, pinning him to the table.

"Wha...? What are you doing?" he asked terrified, finding himself unable to move.

"I think that you have problems with your intestines, so I decided that you needed an enema." She said, pulling closer a strange apparatus.

"**NO! YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND! HELP!"**

**Back to stage...**

Zellas and Filia had a glaring match from 10 min now. Neither of them was willing to give up, so they were standing like two sculptures, without any move, only some sweat covering their foreheads.

"Umm... I see that they are busy, but what about our break?" whispered Lina to Haii's ear, afraid to speak louder and disturb the two women.

"Umm.. you can go. The bar should be ready to entertain you." Haiiro whispered back.

'Great, let's go, Gourry!" yelled Lina, catching the swordsman by hand and run to the bar, along with the audience.

Haiiro looked again at the Mazoku Lord and the last Golden Dragon and sighed. 'How ironic...'

She thought and went to the bar too.

**About 50km from the studio... or whatever it is...**

Luna was walking down the road, kicking angrily the stones in her way.

'That brat!'

She kicked a walking squirrel.

'That flat redhead!'

She kicked pile of grass.

'That... that..argggh!'

She kicked one particularly large stone, only destroying her nailpolish (on toes).

"DAMMIT!"

"Tsk, tsk, touchy today, are we?"

Luna looked at the to of the rock, to see certain mazoku, grinning at her.

"Not your business."

"Oh, and it surely doesn't have anything to do with Lina's tall and handsome companion?" he mocked.

Ina n instant, Luna jumped in the air and caught him by the collar. "Watch it, fruitcake, or I'll have a talk with your master!"

Xellos gulped and thought that he's enough trouble for now, she he shrugged.

Luna dropped him off the rock. "Ohhh.. I'm hopeless.. I can't even get a men who likes me..."

Xel stood up and dusted himself off. "Well.. I'll be going now..."

Lina's sister suddenly jumped in the air with 'I've got it!', and she quickly turned to mazoku. "You're going to help me!"

He sweatdropped. "Heh heh, maybe no?"

"You have nothing to say in this case! " yelled Luna and teleported them both into an unknown place...

**Meanwhile, in tha bar...**

Lina and Gourry were stuffing their mouths with food and Haiiro was watching them with amazement. She was slowly eating rice with cream and sugar.

Then, Amelia walked to them with Zel leaning on her. He didn't look too well.

Lina rose her head. "Whoa" she swallowed all she had in her mouth. "Zel, what's happened?"

"You. Don't. Want. To. Know." He answered.

"Amelia, what our cook said? Is it something serious?" asked Haii.

The princess sat down, offering to Zel a seat next to her, but he gave her a sign that he'd rather stand. "No, she only made him..."

"Oh, look Ame, someone is trying to get into a queue without waiting! It's injustice!" said Zelgadis pointing at the other corner of the room.

"Oh no!" and Amelia dissapeard.

Zel sighed and looked at his friends, who were staring oddly at him. "What?"

"Okaaay.. if you don't want to tell us... we'll ask Xel later." Said Lina and got back to eating.

Haii looked up. "You're sure you don't want to sit down?"

He winced. "I'm sure."

"Hey, guys! Look what I've bought!" came a happy voice of Amelia. She walked to them, holding a small box in her hand. "And by the way, Zel, there was no problem with the queue, they all are behaving properly, are you sure you feel alright?"

"YES, Of Course!" he responded a bit to enthusiastically.

Amelia blinked. "But look!" she rose the box "It's a video with you! And the title is 'Zel's confession'! When have you recorded this?" she asked

He snatched the box out of her hands and looked at the cover. There was he, in that stupid room, where he was talking with his 'conscience' and declaring his love to Ame...

His eyes widened. "I'll get you for this..." he muttered

"Who? What's it 'bout?" Amelia blinked.

"Nothing, really! Don't watch it! Okay?" he said and run away to find the guy who was selling this. And possibly kill him.

The princess frowned. 'Is it something he doesn't want me to see? Why...' she sighed and dropped herself on the chair and immersed herself in thoughts.

She haven't heard the bloodcurdling screams of the guy, from whom she bought the mysterious video...

* * *

Yay, I've finished this chappie. And what I've learned? That promising something is dangerous. And tiring. And annoying. So all I'm going to say, that PROBABLY I'm going to start next chapter next week, so MAYBE you'll se it in TWO, THREE or MORE weeks. I'll TRY to do my best :D 

R&R


	14. Break and lots of chaos

Yay.. so:

First, Kill me. For lack of updates. I'm soo sorry... end of the school year, you know. I had so much things to do that.. ugh... and the results are: 1) I hate Napoleon. 2) I hate physics.3) I hate chemistry. 4) I hate books. 5) The next person to annoy me will die in a terrible accident.

The only thought that keeps me alive is... I'M GOING TO ENGLAND! School trip. From 20.06 to 30.06. I'll be in Oxford and in London... so if you'll a strange group of kids all speaking strange language (polish), I'm probably among them. So you an have a chance to kill me :D

Well.. I'm sorry, now I'll say:

DON'T EXPECT ME TO UPDATE WITHIN NEXT MONTH! OR MAYBE TWO!

I'm moving, so my computer will be out of order.

Heheh.. I've read the last chap. Of my story.. and I absolutely can't remember... what I wanted to do next? Can someone help me? ... okay... happy improvisation.

* * *

**Now I should thank all these people who reviewed.. but I think they'll be more grateful if i updated.. so maybe I'll add their nicknames when I'm back.. yaaawn :3 sorry :D**

* * *

**Somewhere...**

Xellos was sitting on a rock with a torture painted on his face, as Luna was walking in circles and explaining her plan to him.

"Understand?"

"Not quietly."

Luna groaned and glared at him. He covered himself with his hands "JUST JOKING!"

She shook her head angrily. "Don't get on my nerves, priest. It's a serious AND delicate case"

He sighed. 'I know, I know... but can't you do this all alone? Or take someone else? I have enough problems with girls..." the last part was spoken very quietly

Luna turned around with a mocking smile. "Problems with your little dragon?"

Xel sent her a sharp look but said nothing.

"Touchy, touchy" the woman waved her hand. "Nevermind. So, shall we go?"

He shrugged. Luna giggled. "Seems that someone's holding a grudge over me..."

'And I bet that I'm not alone...' thought Xel as they teleported back to the studio.

**And at the bar...**

Amelia poked her meat with a fork. The meat growled and snarled at her. That made her loose her appetite completely.

She glanced at the man standing at her side, but he wasn't paying attention to the world around him. Ame sighed.

"Excuse me." She said getting to her feet. "I'll be back in a minute". All of sudden, she had a mind to get something to drink. Something... alcoholic!

'Miss Lina never orders wine because it's too expensive, and by the way, she is dangerous WITHOUT being drunk.' She thought making her way through the crowd.

'So, what should I choose...' she wondered studying the labels. Most of the wines were the cheap ones, bought in a store across the street, but there was one she knew from home. Her dad never let her drink it, because it was too strong for such a delicate lady like her, but a sip won't harm anyone, won't it?

**AT THE STAGE...**

"So... can you explain why MY son was singing SUCH song with YOU?" asked Zelas

"It was a challenge. I never wanted to take part in it." Answered Filia

"So why are you?"

"Um.. Lina?"

Zelas chuckled. "Yes.. that is an argument I can't beat. And can you tell me... What is the secret of your great figure?" she smiled.

Filia poured two cups of tea and gave one to the Beastmaster.

"Heh, it's nothing special. But what are you doing to keep your hair that way? I always use tons of cosmetic, but still it never looks the way I want..."

"You see, the most important thong is to..."

Xellos was watching this scene from a platform under the ceiling. 'How interesting, how they get along... Quite unusual, especially when they're probably going to be one family soon... WHAT I AM THINKING ABOUT?' he shook his head violently.

'Filia my wife, good joke. Hah hah. I would laugh my head of if was in good mood. But, actually...' he looked closer at the dragoness. In this moment she giggled from somethin Zelas told her. '..why not?'

"Tsk, tsk, aren't you getting too soft?"

Mazoku turned around quickly and saw Luna leaning on a wall.

"How long has you been watching me?"

The woman grinned. "I love the way you get nervous. Now, don't be such a lazyass, remember you promised to help me with my PLAN."

"I don't recall me promising anything to you..." he answered putting a hand on his hip.

"Oh, yes, I FORCED YOU, now come! No time for academic discussions!"

And in that moment they both disappeared.

**BACK TO THE BAR...**

"Has anyone seen Amelia?"

Zelgadis woke from his trance and looked at Haiiro. Just then he realised, that the princess wasn't sitting anymore in her chair.

Lina and Gourry looked surprised too. "I wunduh wha did shah go" said redhead chewing her chicken.

"I'd better go find her." Said Zel making an attempt to plunge in the crowd, but he was stopped by Haii hanging on his cape.

"No, stay here and keep an eye on these two" she looked at the table where the swordsman and the sorceress were checking who can stuff more in their mouth

Zelgadis frowned, but nodded. 'Amelia is surely okay, I don't have to run after her every time she's not in my eyesight.'.'

If he had seen what Haiiro did when she reached the bar...

**NO, MY STORY HAS TO BE COMPLICATED. SO AGAIN BACK TO XEL AND LUNA...**

"I'm NOT doing THIS!" yelled mazoku, trying to free himself from a chair he was tied to.

"Oh yes, you do! Just think about it this way – you can prove again that you are the greatest prankster in the world! With your talent I'm sure they won't be able to tell that you're not me!" answered Luna calmly, taking a lip-gloss from her bag.

"But..but..." he tried to protest, but he stood no chance.

When Luna finished the makeover, she allowed Xel to stand up. Thanks to the cosmetics and the fact, that Xellos was quite slim, practically no magic was needed to make him look like her twin. Twin sister, of course.

"And now, remember, go there and try to get Gourry's attention. Remember, what he reacts to and what I shouldn't do. When you're finished, then you can show up and pretend that it was all a joke. Then, bring all information to me, and this way I'll get my Gourry!"

Mazoku sighed as he watched her dreaming about her future life with a tall blonde swordsmen along her side. But Luna was right, it could be fun. The only minus was that it interfered with his plans with Filia. Not that he had any plans, of course... Or maybe...

Now he was the one dreaming about his future life, when he was brutally woken up with a kick in the $$. It was time to begin the PLAN.

Xel teleported to the door of kitchen and brought from nowhere a plate of delicious cinnamon – vanilla ice cream in a milk chocolate coating. 'The road to man's stomach leads via his stomach' he smiled to himself and went to the table where Slayers sat.

Mazoku grinned as he noticed that every man in the room turned around just to catch a glimpse of him. 'Yeah... men or woman, I still have it' snickered Xel, making his way towards the tall, blonde swordsman.

Lina was the first to spot 'her sister' coming back. In that moment her face was incredible, something like a face of someone who just saw the most ugliest insect in the world eating ten grossy hamburgers from McDonald and at the same time stuffing it's face with mustard.

EWWWWWWW...

That of course made Xellos very happy. He placed his plate before Gourry

"Hey, honey, sorry I left you for so long" he winked. The swordsman blinked.

"Uhm..thanks, but who are you?" he asked scratching his head.

Xel facefaulted and Lina grinned happily.

"Sorry sis, he remembers only people who're worth it"

Xellos stood up "Don't push it too far, 'sis'..." he replied darkly. Oh, benefits of being Lina's older sister...

Just then mazoku noticed that Zelgadis is staring at him suspiciously. Then a thought came to his mind. Xel quickly glanced at Gourry, who was again lost in eating and covering his dessert from Lina.

'Well.. they're not paying attention, so I can annoy our little chimera, as well...'

Zelgadis frowned seeing Luna smiling. There was something suspicious in that smile, but he didn't have time to ponder about it more, because the woman came to him and embraced him with one hand. Zel felt immediately blood rushing to his head.

"And you must be Zelgadis, sorry I haven't talked with you before..."

**LET'S LEAVE THEM ALONE AND SEE WHAT'S HEPPENING AT THE BAR...**

Haiiro was slowly getting irritated. She's the host of this show, but no one shows her any respect! Actually, everyone is stomping on her, yelling at her, and some people were even trying to steal her cape...

"Froooooooooommm Paris to Tokyoooo!"

'Oh, and there are already some people drunk. One of these days...' she muttered.

Then something hit her. She knew the voice of that drunken person. She quickly made her way through the crowd (oh, thank you my shoes with metal) and saw no one but Amelia, singing some latest hits on a top of the table.

"Because of you I never can eat a pepperoni!"

Haii's first thought was to take the princess away, but seeing that everyone seem to enjoy her perform, she decided that it can be funny to take advantage of this situation.

She ran around asking people what song would they give Amelia to sing, and two minutes later she was standing on a table, next to Ame, and speaking to her microphone.

"Drunk Ladies and Drunk Gentlemen! I'd like to present you a short performance by Amelia Wilsomething, who kindly agreed to sing to you although it's a break! So..." Haiiro rose her free hand and waved at Amelia. A cloud of smoke covered the princess, and when it faded she was dressed in a black jacket with white shirt, black trousers and a black hat on her head.

"I made a quick research, that didn't bring any results, so I chose Michel Jackson's song "Bad"! She would never sing it sober, so watch! It's the only occasion!

(A/N: thanks to people who suggested it to me, because it wasn't my idea : ) but I liked it : ) although I had some problems with fitting it in.. but well.. here it is!)

The music started playing and Amelia made a few quick moves characteristic to M.J., what was quite surprising considering her state.

_Your Butt Is Mine _

_Gonna Take You Right _

_Just Show Your Face _

_In Broad Daylight _

Her voice was a bit hoarse, but she still sung pretty well. Truth to be told – who was listening to her now? Everyone was looking, because under the influence of alcohol Ame seemed to be ...less shy. More provoking.

_I'm Telling You _

_On How I Feel _

_Gonna Hurt Your Mind _

_Don't Shoot To Kill _

_Come On, Come On, _

_Lay It On Me All Right... _

The Slayers, who were sitting quite far from the bar, suddenly realised that all the people went somewhere.

"Whuh did they goh?" asked Lina looking around. Zelgadis finally managed to take Xel's hands away and concentrated on sound coming from nearby.

"It's Amelia!" he yelled suddenly and without a look back he run to the bar. Somehow, he made his way to the first row and his mouth dropped to the floor. Amelia, drunk, singin on the table, making such _moves_ wasn't surely something he was expecting. In this moment the princess saw him and winked.

_I'm Giving You _

_On Count Of Three _

_To Show Your Stuff _

_Or Let It Be . . . _

The others chose this moment to catch up.

"Hey, what's wro... Amelia?" Lina had eyes as big as plates. Even Mr I-am-never-surprised-I-know-everything-fruitcake was.

_I'm Telling You _

_Just Watch Your Mouth _

_I Know Your Game _

_What You're About _

Amelia crouched in front of Zelgadis and was now staring right into his eyes, their faces merely inches apart.

_Well They Say The Sky's _

_The Limit _

_And To Me That's Really True _

She started to play with her collar.

_But My Friend You Have _

_Seen Nothing _

_Just Wait 'Til I Get Through . . . _

And Ame jumped on her legs to present a few of Jackson's moves to the rest. Just in time, cause few seconds more and Zel would probably faint from lack of air.

_Because I'm Bad, I'm Bad- _

_Come On _

_(Bad Bad-Really, Really Bad) _

_You Know I'm Bad, I'm Bad- _

_You Know It _

"Umm... quite surprising to hear it from her mouth..." said Lina, not noticing that Gourry was again occupied by 'her sister'.

_(Bad Bad-Really, Really Bad) _

_You Know I'm Bad, I'm Bad- _

_Come On, You Know _

_(Bad Bad-Really, Really Bad) _

"So... tell me, Gourry, do you like girls with full shapes?" whispered Xellos in swordsman's ear, but he didn't seem to affected by this. The blonde simply looked at him... her... I'm confused... him and said "well.. no... I think I don't." And he turned away.

Xel twitched. "It seems that he's lost for Lina... but I'd better not tell this to Luna..."

_And The Whole World Has To _

_Answer Right Now _

_Just To Tell You Once Again, _

_Who's Bad . . . _

_The Word Is Out _

_You're Doin' Wrong _

_Gonna Lock You Up _

_Before Too Long, _

Amelia stood in front of Zel, giving him a nice view of her legs. He was to embarrassed to look higher.

_Your Lyin' Eyes _

_Gonna Take You Right _

_So Listen Up _

_Don't Make A Fight, _

Suddenly he felt Ame's finger under his chin and she forced him to look up.

_Your Talk Is Cheap _

_You're Not A Man _

_You're Throwin' Stones _

_To Hide Your Hands _

Zel couldn't help not to twitch. _Stones..._Yeah...

_But They Say The Sky's _

_The Limit _

_And To Me That's Really True _

She let Zel go and struck a pose pointing at the ceiling. Then she made a perfect back flip and landed in a split.

_And My Friends You Have _

_Seen Nothin' _

_Just Wait 'Til I Get Through . . . _

Amelia jumped to her legs and begun a tap – dance. Lina was still to shocked to notice what's going on behind her back.

"So you think that girl should be short?"

"Yep."

"And have long hair?"

"...I think so."

"And she should know how to defend herself?"

"...well... yes..."

"And that she shouldn't be too cultural?"

"What does it mean?"

"Hopeless..."

_Woo! Woo! Woo! _

_(And The Whole World Has _

_To Answer Right Now _

_Just To Tell You Once _

_Again . . .) _

_You Know I'm Bad, I'm Bad- _

_Come On _

In that moment Amelia grabbed Zel by collar and dragged him to the scene. His weak protests were ignored.

_(Bad Bad-Really, Really Bad) _

_You Know I'm Bad, I'm Bad- _

_You Know It-You Know It _

_(Bad Bad-Really, Really Bad) _

_You Know, You Know, You _

_Know, Come On _

_(Bad Bad-Really, Really Bad) _

_And The Whole World Has To _

_Answer Right Now _

The situation was more and more uncomfortable. When the princess started to use Zel in a very similar way that some nice ladies use tubes in some nice clubs, he decided that it's gone too far. He started whispering a purifying spell...

_(And The Whole World Has To _

_Answer Right Now) _

_Just To Tell You _

_(Just To Tell You Once Again) _

Which of course had to start work when the song was over... Amelia fainted in his arms, but the audience was furious. Immediately, the table was covered by flowers, money, and even some pieces of clothing...

Zelgadis ignored then and carried Amelia away (in a bridal fashion). Just then Lina spotted that Gourry is... gone?

The sorceress winced. 'Great, I'm not watching him for a second and he's already gone... With Luna! I'm gonna, I'm gonna...' she was looking desperately around, but couldn't find her companion. 'I'm gonna... I'm gonna do nothing...' she sat with resignation in a chair. 'Let's face the truth.. if he wants her, then I stand no chance... Maybe I should... give up?'

"DON'T GIVE UP, MY CHILD!"

Lina jumped in a surprise. She looked at her right, where moment ago no one sat, and saw a tall lady dressed in... actually dressed normally, but she had a purple sweater on her head that was probably supposed to look like turban.

"And who are you? And how do you know my thoughts?" asked redhead.

"Uhuuuhh... Joseph the fairy knows everything!"

(A/N. Joseph the fairy is one of my alter ego... whenever I have a good mood I turn into him to bring everyone down with my infamous fortune telling! But it's not important..)

Lina frowned. "Yeah..right... Now, I'm going to stand up and I'll slowly walk awaaaayy!"

She couldn't even finish this sentence, because Joseph the fairy caught her by hand and threw her to the floor.

"NO, YOU CAN'T GO NOW! I MUST TELL YOU SOMETHING VERY IMPORTANT! QUICK, TAKE ONE CARD!" and she showed Lina two cards. The sorceress took one of them and looked at it. It was a Joker. Joseph snatched it from her hand and gasped dramatically.

"You know what it means ? You know ? The joker is free and is planning something! RUN FOREST, RUN!" and she run away.

Lina titled her head. 'Where do such people come from...' then she noticed that Joker was lying on a floor. Redhead took it in her hands and looked at it with wonder. 'Joker... planning something... joker... joker... WHERE IS XELLOS?"

And said mazoku was now sitting with Gourry and noting some important facts from his life.

"So, you don't like girls with short blonde hair?"

"Yeah, you should have been where I've been and you would be afraid too!"

"Hehe, no doubt. And... "

"GOURRY!"

The swordsman looked around. "Hi Lina, I was wondering where are you."

She was just about to reply, when she saw whom he's with. She saddened suddenly. "Umm.. Nevermind.. I'll go to find Xellos alone... I don't want to disturb you..."

Gourry literally jumped after her "What are you saying? I'm going with you!"

Lina looked at him with stars in her eyes. "really?"

Swordsman sighed. "Lina, listen, I know that I'm less intelligent than you, but there are some things I see, and I see that we need to talk seriously."

Redhead opened her mouth, but blonde continued.

"I see that you 're afraid that when your sister is around I you're not important to me, but you're wrong! You're always the most important person for me and.. and.. and I..."

"Yes?" Lina felt her heart beaten faster and faster...

"What was I saying?"

:facefault: "typical..."

**Meanwhile, in a quiet corner... somewhere... in the backstage...**

Amelia slowly opened her eyes. First, her vision was blurry, then a terrible headache hit her. She sat up holding her head.

"Amelia? Are you okay?"

These voice... so much concern in it ... it could be only one person...

"Zel...?"

"Don't worry. You've just..emm...umm..."

Amelia looked at him with wide eyes.

"Just what?"

Zel scratched his head. 'I can't ell her what she's done, she would be upset.'

"You've.. you've... you've just experienced a great shock! Yes! Shock! And you fainted! And ... and..." he didn't know what to say.

"And why was I shocked? I don't remember..."

"Heh heh.. nothing important, really" He felt that lying to her is wrong. He would entrust her his life, but...

On the other hand Amelia got suspicious. "What kind of shock was that?"

In that moment the door slammed wide open, showing no one else than Luna.

"Zelly-poo! Why do you hide from me? Now that we're steady you should hide WITH me not FROM!"

Now Amelia was shocked. She looked with bitter in her eyes at Zel and.. fainted.

Zelgadis somehow managed to catch her before princesses' head hit the table she was lying on. He turned to Luna and yelled angrily

"WHAT CAME UPON YOU?"

She looked worriedly at them. "Oh.. sorry.. I though it would be a great joke, let me help you..."

* * *

Yay, I finished this chap. Now I just have to read it 5 times, correct it, delete half of it and write it from the beginning, re-write the other half, than win a battle with my internet and post it. All in... umm... 1 hour? Great...

And guess what? I checked it only once! so.. I'll check it again when I'm back :D sorry?

But tomorrow I'm going to England! YAAAAAAYYY! I'm going to live first.. ummm... 3 days? In Oxford... on.. ummm.. Waynflete Road, I think... yaaaayyy:D

So, take an opportunity to kill me! Now I can sing a song. By Adam Sandler:

_Somebody kill me please, somebody kill me please_

_I'm on my knees begging pretty please, kill meee..._

_I want to die..._

AND HAPPY VACATION / HOLIDAYS:D :D :D


	15. Special dedication L&G

Oh God...what can I say... well, now I'm attending the last class of high school and my GCSE/high school finals/bac/matura is getting closer and closer...

I have to learn sooooooooo much : (

But as some people kept insisting on me to update, and besides, I hate unfinished stories, I decided to try and write the next chappie.

I had to re-read last three chapters of this story and study my notes to even remember what's going on :P

But I still don't remember where I was heading. Oh well :P

* * *

And reviewers 

Niele-Mzk

Airi-chan

Rukia-sama

Magic-Noise

And finally to Iceo, who made me write this chapter

It's nice to know that there are people who remember me : )

THAANK YOU! YOU ARE WONDERFUL!!!

Sorry for mistakes. I know I make them. Hope I'm improving though.

* * *

"WHAT CAME UPON YOU?" 

Luna looked worriedly at them. "Oh.. sorry.. I though it would be a great joke, here, let me help you..."

Zelgadis eyes her suspiciously. Why she was so nice all of sudden?  
They've rose Amelia into a sitting position.

"Amelia? Wake up!" Zel patted her cheek softly "Come on, wake up!"

"Maybe a kiss from the prince charming?"

Zel sent a murder glare towards Luna, who was sitting cross-legged next to him.

She shrugged "It works in fairy tales, doesn't it?"

"Go to hell"

Xellos choked trying to subside his laughter. He was actually pulling it off! Even that all-knowing chimera seemed to fall for his trick.  
Mazoku quickly regained his composure and asked

"What are you going to do with her?"

"After you almost gave her a heart attack? I guess I'll just find a place as far as possible from you... and Xellos, until she wakes up." And Zel picked Amelia up (again bridal-style) and made his way towards exit.

"You realise that she fainted because she thought that you are already taken?"

Zelgadis froze. That's right – the princess lost consciousness when Luna told her that they were a couple. So maybe... but just maybe... what he heard from the cook was true, and the girl in his arms really DID like him. Zelgadis smiled softly at that thought and walked away.

Xellos sighed leaning his head on his hand. "Since when do I help Mr. Grumpy hook up with Miss. Cheerful?"

"...Instead of hooking up me and Gourry?"

Xel gulped and turned around to face... an exact copy of him.

"wha?"

Luna giggled (which sounded rather weird in _his_ voice) and brushed his..her.. hair over shoulder. "Surprised? I cannot risk someone seeing the two of us in the same place at the same time so I had to borrow your body."

"Great... What do you want now?"

Luna kneeled down next to him. "You've learned anything?"

Xel took out his notebook "He likes Italian food, most of his free time he sleeps or eats, when he was 9 he was dropped into a cauldron with growth potion and his second name is Hugh."

"Hugh?"

"I've made that one up."

Mazoku decided that introducing Luna to the part of the list that clearly stated that swordsman's ideal woman was Lina was NOT a good idea.

"Okay..these my help..." Luna propped her chin with one hand. "But that's not enough! Focus on your work from now on!" she sent him a warning glance and disappeared.

She re-appeared in tha bar. Refusing to notice that the place is suspiciously empty, she ordered a glass of 'something stronger'. Luna swallowed all at once letting her thoughts wander _again _to a certain swordsman.

Suddenly she found herself hovering upside-down over the floor, held by her leg.

"Oh, Xellos, nice to see you, now get your rear to the stage RIGHT NOW! THE BREAK IS OVER!" yelled Haiiro and immediately teleported them on the stage.

The audience didn't react at all as they saw the host appear on the centre of the stage with purple haired mazoku with in one hand, and a herring in other, throw the first on his armchair, smack him with a fish and then disappear again.

They've already seen the same scene, only involving Lina and a mackerel and Gourry and a whale.

**Mean while ( ;P), as far away from Xellos and Luna as possible...**

Zelgadis found himself in a bright room with a cosy sofa, where he put Ame down. He was slightly worried that she was sill unconscious.

He leant over her, getting a closer look at her face. He wiped away a few strands of raven hair from her face, looked at her closed eyes with long black eyelashes, her rosy cheeks, slightly parted lips...

Maybe that idea of waking kiss wasn't that bad at all...

Just then Amelia's eyebrow twitched as a sign that she's waking up

He quickly jumped away fearing that she might overreact when she sees him that close to her.

'I see these headlines' he thought 'Travel companion of the Princess of Saillune accused of molesting her while she was unconscious... that's a bit too long for a headline though...'

"Zel?" she whispered opening her eyes slowly.

"I'm here" he said kneeling down, so their eyes were on the same level

"oh" she smiled faintly, but then her face dropped "and where is.. Luna?'

"I don't know and I don't care" she opened her mouth but he continued "what she said about her and me wasn't true, don't worry!" he caressed her cheek, as she looked at him with wide eyes

'Could it be that he's going to do what I think?'

He leant a bit closer "I could never be with a women like her, because..."

"Yes?"

"Because... I'm in..."

"GOT YOU TWO!!!"

Both Amelia and Zel jumped on their legs, surprised by Haii who appeared over them, holding in her hands a sprat and electric eel...

**Some time later, on the stage...**

"Now that I've collected everyone, shall we continue our show?"

YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAy!

That's when a tape-recorded applause comes useful

"Aaalllright! Our next challenge is... a special dedication song!"

YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!

"It means that the contestant will be given 5 songs and will choose a person, to whom he or she would like to address this song to. It means he (or she) will MEAN every single word of the lyrics"

Haii grinned.

As Haii was bubbling about no-one-cares-what, Xellos finally got to the stage. For a powerful mazoku, he had lots of problems with moving around without teleportation. Oh his way to Gourry's armchair, he noticed Beastmaster (now occupying his chair) talking with Filia and... himself?

'Might as well listen to what they're talking about'

He leant over them carefully not to gain their attention.

Lina too was eyeing the three. Since she learned that the fruitcake named Xellos is planning something.. well... knowing him that long taught her that he is not to be ignored.

At the moment, he was sitting on the armrest of his armchair, talking with Filia and Zellas, with her sister leaning over him. 'That's suspicious' she decided and quietly snuck behind them.

"...and then I had a vision of two swords falling down and could warn those two that neither of them will win." Filia finished speaking

"Nice one, although I personally prefer telling future from cards, that's more entertaining" came, surprisingly, Xel's voice.

'I never realised he was into prophecies... And cards, just like Luna' Lina glanced at her sister 'I wonder why she's not joining them when it's obviously her subject...' she mused

"Once I... uh... decided to have a drink it that one bar... yes, and I saw two men arguing about something involved with cards. And well... I decided to walk over and offered them a little future telling session... They were very loud as they argued so you know, I wanted to silence them..."

The redhead furrowed her eyebrows. 'That doesn't sound to me like Xellos... and this story sounds suspiciously similar to me' she thought and looked at Luna. The girl was still leaning on their chair, her eyes drifting from Zellas to Filia.

"...and that night one of them learned that he be famous but die early, and the other that his future wife will turn out to be a men!"

The Beastmaster raised her eyebrow in amusement while Filia couldn't help herself and giggled.

Lina's eyes widened. 'it _can't be..._'

Luna only smiled faintly looking at giggling blonde.

"I didn't know you had such adventures, my priest" said Zellas

"Because he didn't!" yelled the redhead revealing herself "what kind of sick game are you playing now, _LUNA?_"

The room fell silent. Everyone looked at Lina's sister, who stared at her blankly. Only when Xellos nudged her, she remembered how to speak.

"_owch_... I mean, I don't know what you're talking about."

"Cut it out, _Xellos_, I've heard this story thousand times, I _know_ that you've switched bodies!"

Everyone gasped.

"I.. I don't..." Luan tried weakly, but Xel gave her sign to stop. Mazoku slowly stood up and faced Lina.

"It seems that you've gained some brains after all" he hissed and snapped his fingers, changing immediately in Luna.

Lina facefaulted. 'Great, as if _one_ Luna wasn't enough'

"Why did you do this?"

"None of your business, sis" she made her way towards Gourry "but now I'm..."

The sorceress grabbed her by arm "Oh no you don't!"

They had a short glaring mach, but then Haiiro popped between to of them.

"May I suggest something?" she squeezed two pieces of paper in their hands. "maybe you want to sing this?"

The girls studied the text quickly and then looked at each other.

"Okay" the said unison and went backstage

"Don't kill yourselves." She sighed "NOW! Shall we talk with someone? Maybeeeeee... YOU!"

And she flew to a table where three teenagers sat, two boys and a girl. One boy had a snow white hair, glowing green eyes and a tight black and white costume, with a letter 'D' on his chest. The other boy had dark skin, was wearing a pair of glasses, red beret, yellow blouse and green trousers. The girl was a quite typical goth, pale skin, dark hair, black T-shirt with a purple oval printed on her chest, black skirt and black combat boots.

"Who are you and what's your name?" Haii asked the strange-looking boy.. I mean the first boy.

"Umm... Hi" he waved his hand to the public" My name is Danny Phantom and these are my friends, Sam" the girl waved her hand "And Tucker" who was too busy playing on his PD.

"Can you tell me what's the source of that glow around you?" asked Haii. Indeed, Danny was surrounded by faint white light.

"Well... um.. I'm a half-ghost, so..."

"OH NOES! THE UNDEAD!" yelled someone in the audience and everyone started to panic. Some people jumped out of the windows, some hid under their tables, and some just closed their eyes pretending that they are not there.

"Whaddya mean half-ghost?"

"Well" the boy scratched the back of his head "My parents sort of built that ghost portal and I accidentally got into it."

"Oh..great. Are you two going out?" Haii blurted out looking from Sam to Danny.

They both blushed and yelled in unison "WE'RE NOT LOVEBIRS!"

"oookayy... that wasn't exactly the question, but if you say so.. Now, back on the stage, our girls should be ready by now...sooo..."

"WAAAAAAAH!"

"I'd like to introduce you to Lina and Luna as Brandy and Monica in a song "The boy is mine'! Applause!!"

Ignore the yell.

Lina and her sister walked on the stage. Lina was dresses in tight-fitting jeans and a tight, lime-green revealing blouse. She had a bit stronger make-up on her face and some jewellery, mainly gold and green. Luna was wearing a low-cut white t-shirt, jeans mini and black high-heel shoes. Her make-up consisted of a golden eye shadow and dark lipstick.

The tune started and Lina started to sing, quietly at the beginning, then stronger with every word.

_You need to give it up, had about enough  
__It's not hard to see, the boy is mine_

"Aaaah... so THAT's what the song is about!" smirked Xel

_I'm sorry that you, seem to be confused_  
_He belongs to me, the boy is mine_

Lina made a step towards Luna

_I think it's time we got this straight  
__Let's sit and talk face to face  
__There is no way you could mistake him for your man  
__Are you insane?_

Luna put one hand on her hip and the other above her chest

_**See I know that you may be just a bit jealous of me**_  
In this moment she petted her chest suggestively  
_**'Cause' you're blind  
**__**If you can't see that his love is all in me**_

_See I try to hesitate, I didn't want to say what he told me  
__He said without me he couldn't make through the day_  
_Ain't that a shame_

Lina smirked triumphantly. Everyone stared with amazement at this musical quarrel

_**Maybe you misunderstood, plus I can't see  
**__**How he could wanna take time and that's all good  
**_She shook her hips  
_**All of my love was all it took**_

This time they sang together..

_**You need to give it up, had about enough  
**__**It's not hard to see, the boy is mine  
**_**I'm sorry that you, seem to be confused**  
_**He belongs to me, the boy is mine **_

Lina was getting more and more angry.  
'How come nature decided to equip HER with everything and forget about ME?'

_Must you do the things you do keep on acting like a fool  
__You need to know it's me not you well_ _If you didn't know it girl, it's true_

Luna was still pretty self-conscious.

_**I think that you should realize and try to understand why  
**__**He is a part of my life, I know it's killing you inside**_

Now Lina jumped to her sister, caught her by the front of T-shirt and yelled into her face.

_You can say what, you wanna say!  
__What we have you can't take!  
__From the truth you can't escape!  
__I can tell the real from the fake!_

Luna snorted

_**When will you get the picture  
**__**You're the past I'm the future  
**__**Get away it's my time to shine if you didn't know the boy is mine**_

The audience was left speechless.

_**You need to give it up, had about enough  
**__**It's not hard to see, the boy is mine  
**_**I'm sorry that you, seem to be confused**  
_**He belongs to me, the boy is mine**_

Lina was officially pissed of.

_You can't destroy this love I've found  
__Your silly games I won't allow  
__The boy is mine without a doubt  
__You might as well throw in the towel_

Luna opened her mouth to sing her part, but Lina suddenly pulled her down, so they were on the same level now. This motion left the older one breathless for a second, and Lina continued with Luna's lyrics.

_What makes you think that he wants you  
__When I'm the one that brought him to special places in my heart  
__It was my lovin' from the start!_

And seeing this determination Luna... Luna almost decided to give up.  
But as a popular advertisement in my country says, almost makes a big difference.  
But anyways, she stopped singing and allowed Lina to finish the song alone

_You need to give it up, had about enough  
It's not hard to see, the boy is mine  
I'm sorry that you, seem to be confused_  
_He belongs to me, the boy is mine_

_Not yours, but mine  
__Not yours, but mine..._

This was one of these moments where there was no need to put on the tape, audience burst out into applause for the duet. Lina smirked, abruptly threw her sister away and triumphantly walked away, while Luna got herself up and walked off to the exit on other side of the stage.

In the mess that created when everyone started discussing that not-so-ordinary encounter, no one noticed that Gourry got on his feet and jumping over Tasuki who lain drunken in the passage, run to catch up with Lina.

**And so, backstage, in front of the changing room...**

"Lina!" gasp "Linaaa!"

The sorceress turned around slowly to see the guy of her dreams running to her. He stopped on an arm length from her and breathed heavily to regain his composure.

"Yes?"

"I.. well... this song... umm... well..." for a moment it seemed that he was fighting with himself.

If Lina weren't that taken aback by Gourry's entrance, she would surely be worried about him fainting from thinking too much or something.

"Nice performance by the way... You've surely shown Luna who's the boss here." He smiled the way Lina's heart almost melted

"I wanted to ask you one thing..."he leant a little closer, lowering his voice. The redhead felt that she's blushing…

"Who.. who is that guy you were fighting over?"

"AAAAAAAAARG!" Lina screamed in frustration. Could it be _more_ obvious? She grabbed him by the collar in rage "We were fighting over you, dammit! YOU!"

For a moment there was silence. The sorceress realised what she's just said and tried to withdraw her hands, but Gourry caught her by wrists.

"Huh?"

The look on his face resembled a happy puppy. "Glad you've finally admitted it." He hugged her affectionately and then walked away.

Lina stood there, his words running in her mind

'_glad you've finally admitted it ..._He is glad ... _glad you've finally admitted it ... _I admitted that I _like_ him ... _you've finally admitted it ... _I finally said it... _finally admitted it ... _wait...'

"YOU! GET BACK HERE! WHAT THAT **FINNALY** WAS SUPPOSED TO MEAN??!!"

**On the stage..**

Filia sat cross-handed since Luna's plan was revealed, refusing to even look at Xellos,but now, no one seemed to pay attention to them...

"So it was her for all that time?" she almost whispered, but he managed to hear.

"Yeah" he whispered back

Filia sighed "Could've guessed. You were too nice."

Xellos blinked with sudden realisation. "What did you and Luna do while I was gone?" he asked turning abruptly to her.

Dragoness jumped at his motion. "well... nothing. First I was talking with Zellas, then you... I mean Luna came while we were talking about you and... Zellas told me a few funny stories about you and we laughed a bit..."

"The story about crocodile and diapers too?" mazoku asked

Filia tried hard not to laugh "Well, yes"

Xel hid his face in his hands. "And then?"

"We came here and Zellas said something about fortune-telling, and I said I am interested into it... and you said that you too... and we were talking about it. And..that's when I think you came..." she glanced at him.

"well...at least you enjoyed talking with me for once" he said

She was taken aback by his words, but didn't have a chance to ask him about it, because Haii's next interviewer turned out to be a ghost (like Danny), only more... destructive.

Maintenet... darn it.. Right now whole security was running after him, while his little friend, namely a girl about 12 in red poncho with a spider-web pattern, tried to convince him to stop.

"But Babes, this is fun..." said the ghost throwing a snake at one fat lady

"Beej, this is not fun for these poor people!" she dodged when a table jumped over her, chasing security guards

"But..." he paused catching a bug with his tongue and eating it

"Beetlejuice!"

"Watch with this B word!" he yelled finally stopping his act of destruction

"So listen to me! Argh..." she caught her companion by arm and dragged him outta the room.

"Sorry for him!" she said closing the door.

"Clean this up... if you can... ALLLRIGHT! Time for Gourry to choose a song!" yelled Haiiro when Lina finally got back.

The swordsman walked to the host and looked through the lyrics. " I choose this one"

"And who is your _special dedication?_" asked Haii wiggling her eyebrows suggestively

"Lina" he sent her a charming smile and disappeared in the backstage

"WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooooooooooo"

The redhead blushed AGAIN.

Zel was quiet since Haiiro dragged him and Amelia on stage. It could be easily told that he was thinking very hard about something and, obviously, holding himself back from making someone suffer.

Suddenly Zelgadis stood up and, ignoring Amelia, walked over to Xel.

"May I ask you a question?"

"Uh?" That was rare, Zel voluntary talking with Xellos? That had to be serious...

Filia chose that moment to excuse her and walk away. Somehow, she lost all interest in looking at Xel getting beaten...

"You were in Lunas' body during whole break?"

"Well..."

"So it was you who jumped into me and Amelia screaming something about _us_ being together? What almost gave her a heart attack?"

Mazoku noticed that chimera's hands clenched into fists.

Xel looked around and noticed that Filia was again talking with Zellas, what gave him a free hand. He smirked in his famous way, eyes squinted.

He stood up and walked over to Zelgadis, who shrieked away.

Mazoku put his finger under Zel's chin. "And what if I said I wanted to say this ever since we met?"

Amelia, who eavesdropped their conversation, almost choked.

Zelgadis was boiling with anger and tried to snap his hand away, but Xellos was quicker and disappeared.

Zel hid his face in hand. 'Why do I even try?'

**Meanwhile...**

Luna sat somewhere in dark corner of backstage

'I never saw Lina so determined to get something... maybe I should quit... maybe... but maybe I should see what's Gourry's reaction!'

And with this thought she got up and ran towards the stage... or where she assumed it was. You can never be sure in this place...

Back on stage...

"Sooo.. lads and gents, greet Gourry Gabriev as Jesse McCartney in a song "Why don't you kiss her", which is _specially _dedicated to Lina Inverse!"

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Everyone stared at Lina, who was now torn between melting and fireballing the audience.

Anyone noticed lack of aggressive intentions against Gourry?

The swordsmen walked on the stage and every girl (and some boys) in the room gasped.

Some would say that he spent some extra time in front of the mirror to look the best in front of Lina, but some would say that he was always good looking, nevertheless he looked GOOD.Was it for his hair (which looked the same as ever, but who knows?), or maybe his clothes (though what's so extraordinary in black jacket threw over a white T-shirt and a pair of dark blue jeans), or maybe in his special smile (... I'm cutting it out).

He walked over to the microphone, a bit nervously.

'Come on, man, stay calm, what's the big deal anyway? She said it, you'll say it... in front of thousands people... what was I.. oh yes, the song!'

Gourry gulped, and started singing; unaware of the fact that Luna watched his every step from above.

_We're the best of friends_

Luna almost fell of the rod she was sitting on. 'HA! BEST FRIENDS! I KNEW IT!'

_And we share our secrets  
She knows everything  
That is on my mind_

The swordsman looked Lina, but she shyly looked away. 'he really thinks so?' she thought

_Maybe, something's changed  
As I lie awake in my bed  
A voice here inside my head_

"He hears voices? Like me!!" Xel smiled. Filia, who came back right before Gourry made his entrance, smiled at him.

'You're impossible' she thought

'I know'

_Softly says  
Why don't you kiss her_

Lina and Gourry blushed

_Why don't you tell her  
Why don't you let her see  
The feelings that you hide  
Cause she'll never know  
If you never show  
The way you feel inside_

The red head looked at him. 'Now I really don't understand what that 'finally' was supposed to mean, if he..."

_Oh, I'm so afraid  
To make that first move_

Lina raised her eyebrows 'oh'?

"Probably afraid to be fireballed" grumbled Zel

_Just a touvh and we  
Could cross the line  
And everytime she's near  
I wanna never let her go  
Confess to her what my heart knows  
Hold her close_

Zelgadis glanced at Amelia. 'I guess I know what he means...'  
_  
Why don't you kiss her  
Why don't you tell her  
Why don't you let her see  
The feelings that you hide_

Gourry glanced at Lina to see how she's reacting to his song. Now, she was gazing at him dreamily, with a happy smile on her face. Good sign.  
_  
__Cause she'll never know  
If you never show  
The way you feel inside_

_What would she say  
I wonder, would she just turn away_

The swordsman took a step towards the redhead, what woke her from her trance.

_Or would she promise me  
That she's here to stay_

Now he stood directly in front of her.

_It hurts me to wait  
I keep asking myself_

He squatted, so their eyes were on the same level.  
_  
__Why don't you kiss her_

Suddenly a few guys (looking suspiciously like US5) jumped out from nowhere and sang as backing singers

_(tell __her you love her)  
__Why don't you tell her  
__(tell __her you need her)___

Tthe 5 guys sand that very emotionally, then they just stood making strange gestures towards the audience, Filia, Xellos, lamp..

_Why don't you let her see  
The feelings that you hide  
__Cause she'll never know_

Gourry grabbed Lina's hand

_If you never show  
The way you feel inside_

___Why don't you... kiss her  
_ Thoughts in Lina's mind were racing like mad and her cheeks were so warm that she was afraid that she was afraid that she's gonna burn there and then

Gourry's face... he was so close..so close that... that...

And then, their lips touched, very lightly at first, than she leant in, deepening the kiss.

Lina couldn't form her thoughts,compleatly lost in that new sensation. She felt him squeeze one of her hands, while her other one suddenly was on his chest, but she couldn't tell which was left, which right...

Then, he slowly moved away, ending their kiss...

* * *

**YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHHAHAHAHAHA**

Oh, how I hate it when someone ends a chapter in the least appropriate moment. But now, as I found this sadistic pleasure of finding such moments and ending, I cannot blame people who do it  
I realised that it's hard for me to write from Gourry's point of view.  
And I had so many problems with _the kiss_. At some point I wanted to copy it from someone, but that would be cheating :P  
Besides, I didn't know whether to let the kiss happen of ruin the situation like I did it before.  
So many problems with 3 sentences :P I'm piteous.

See you next time!

I must warn you that I have my GCSE/high school finals/bac/matura (whether language you prefer) in... 97 days.. and I'm SOOOOO not ready...

AND IF ANYONE WANTED TO HELP ME

I am looking for embarrassingly romantic songs (for Lina, Ame and Zel)

And maybe somethin Filia could specially dedicate... Looking for songs (especially when I don't know what I'm exactly looking for) is tiresome : (


End file.
